Change Of Heart
by yyumi
Summary: Ryou loves his yami, but never thinks Bakura would ever do the same for him for the way he is and treats him. What will make Bakura ever realize what love truely is? COMPLETE
1. You've hurt me

He screamed more; the disturbing and assiduous sounds of pain echoeing slightly through the expanse of the small apartment. However, he was too weak to even fight back, which he had never even dared and had stubbornly refused by thinking about the outcoming consequences of punishment he would get as much worse than ever before. Blood was shown painted across the white walls, not so noticeably in appearance by the usual bright ruby color of the substance, but instead faintly.   
  
He was finally shoved harshly into the wall again for the last time, or as if hopefully the last, as his head hit the wall behind him lifelessly. His whole body ached terribly and awfully, more blood flowing out from his injured wounds, new bruises shown upon his arms and face. A small line of blood trailed slowly down his pale neck that had been trailed from the side of his face. He coughed violently, blood shooting out from his own mouth. He couldn't take it anymore--he had gone through it almost seemingly all day, and he had already desperately wished that it would finally come to an end. Yes, he was getting beaten up by the malicious yami; his own darkness, or as if you could also call it his other 'darker' half. It seemed to him that Bakura actually enjoyed doing these things to him---he knew Bakura didn't really care about him.  
  
Bakura just watched the smaller boy with a wicked amusement as the youth still struggled against the pain. He breathed heavily and deeply from lack of air while trying to get back up onto his feet again, but he really didn't manage to and failed miserably. He fell back down immediately. More blood flew out his mouth as he coughed trying to get rid of the red liquid from his bloody mouth.  
  
"Get up hikari..I'm not done with you yet. And stop coughing blood. It's getting annoying." Bakura had a really threatening tone in his voice which even scared him sometimes. He didn't know why Bakura did this to him.  
  
Suddenly, Bakura picked him carelessly up by the soft white hair of his mane and once again violently shoved him against the wall yet again, causing some objects to fall off the shelves.  
  
"S-Stop..p-please.." Ryou begged while studdering and shaking violently. Bakura approached him maliciously and harshly grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, meeting the boy's pale face with his dangerous glare, expressing somewhat that he wasn't really impressed by the boy's pathetic behavior towards him.  
  
"Noone tells me when to stop, I'll stop whenever i feel like it!" with that Bakura strongly punched Ryou in the stomach with a free fist. The boy's reaction was to quickly open his mouth and breath from being thoroughly winded. Both of his hands went to automatically hold his stomach in pain, whimpering and coughing. Bakura just smirked evilly as he picked the boy carelessly up again and cornered him against the wall behind him.  
  
Ryou didn't even dare to look at his yami in the eyes---he knew what the consequences would obviously be if he did so he just gazed down at the floor beneath him, afraid what the other would possibly do next. In these small things he wasn't allowed to do anything, unless asking for the permission from Bakura.  
  
Bakura chuckled after seeing the look of fright in the teen's innocent chocolate eyes filled with tears and sorrow.  
  
"Poor hikari...do you fear me?" Bakura taunted while brushing some strands of hair away that had been in the boy's face with his blood stained hand. Ryou didn't know what to say; he remained completely silent the whole entire time, whimpering softly, and begging silently to himself that it would soon all end.   
  
"Now, now dear hikari . . you arn't afraid of your own yami are you . . hmm?" The darker boy asked again as he soon took a small piece of strand from the boy's snowy hair and twirled it between his fingers idly. He flinched cautiously and whimpered more desperately, innocent eyes pleading strong emotion.  
  
Bakura then smirked maliciously as he reached out for the boy's exposed throat with one of his hands. He instantly choked on his yami's tight grip, struggling to pull away. He began tugging and scratching Bakura's arm hoping maybe if that would make him to let go of him. Bakura only tightened his grasp onto the boy's thin throat, making him more frightened from what could possibly happen to him.  
  
He struggled and managed to get some oxygen through his closed lungs, but he couldn't really get much. Small tears began to persistently run down his cheeks as one of them landed on Bakura's wrapped hand below.  
  
"Hmm...should I just suffocate you to death now or just let you live, so I can enjoy torturing you for the rest of your pathetic life...?" Bakura grinned wildly into the boy's face; ecstatic of pure cruelty growing more inside of him as he enjoyed the pleasure of hurting the other. Bakura only made Ryou cry more; the fact that it was terrifying the poor boy more already.  
  
"Your such a weakling, crying all the time...tsk, tsk."  
  
Ryou managed to at least say something from his mouth, but it was almost clear enough for Bakura to understand.   
  
"A-Aishiteru..." Ryou winced and flinched. The spirit's smirk that had been played viciously upon his smiling lips instantly faded as soon as he heard the boy say that. Ryou only let out a very weak smile. Bakura thought that the boy had gone to the point to being crazy or stupid. How could his hikari be saying that even at the very moment especially when he's getting abused badly by him? There wasn't any other explanation except probably by the possible thought that maybe all this distress he was giving to the boy must of screwed his brain up or something worse.  
  
"What are you talking about? Don't say such foolish stuff!"  
  
Bakura finally released his hand from the youth's sore neck, making him literally gasping for air immediately right after, but even before Ryou got the chance to help himself, Bakura instantly punched him the face, hoping maybe if that would make some sense into the 'stupid' boy.  
  
More blood flew out his mouth landing down on the soft white carpet, staining that once beautiful fabric as the redness of the thick fluid ruined it beneath him. Bakura just laughed at the helpless boy. Ryou's hair were covered with red streaks and his clothes were all terribly torn up, painted with his own blood and leaving odd patterns in his stripped shirt. Bakura brought his hand up to his own lips and licked the blood off from his fingers ravenously, moaning softly, and making sure to leave no any remaining on the skin; this made Ryou almost go crazy from the sight. One of the facts that he knew was that Bakura was literally obsessed over it, seemingly thirsty for it at the most time. His own blood captivated the darker boy greatly, and Ryou soon realized that he would never get enough of it. He knew Bakura knew this made him sick to his own stomach so it was obvious that he did this purposely to torture him. But the truth that Ryou had already known was that Bakura would never kill him. He still needed his body for his evil flaws, but never wondered about the thought what would happen to him if Bakura ever got his own body then. Of coarse, he wouldn't be needing him for any purpose anymore. Ryou wanted to die rather than living through with his abusive ways.  
  
"You need a wash..." Bakura muttered.  
  
Bakura dragged him by the shirt to the restroom nearby. Bakura went to the tub and filled it with cold water from the facet until it was full. Ryou didn't really know what was going on---he thought at first Bakura was going to take him a bath, but that didn't really sound something nice that the tomb-robber would ever do for his light.  
  
Without warning Bakura grabbed him by the hair and dunked his head into the cold water. Ryou could feel water going into his lungs and he choked, at first he thought Bakura was trying to drown him to death. After awhile Bakura finally lifted Ryou's head from the bathtub, revealing the youth's very sick looking face. Bakura then dragged him back to the living room, and threw him back down on the hard floor. Ryou was still coughing violently from all the water he gagged on from previously, and he was soaking wet.  
  
"Have you had enough today hikari?" Bakura smirked.  
  
Ryou didn't reply back but only stood silent once more.  
  
"Why don't you answer my question?" Bakura still glared at the "stupid" boy. Ryou still didn't say anything; this was making Bakura literally pissed off.  
  
"Baka..." Bakura mumbled. "I guess if you don't say anything that means you wouldn't mind if I still continued...eh?" Bakura grinned again. Fear filled the boy's eyes again. Bakura liked it whenever Ryou got scared of him, that would be the exact thing that Bakura wanted Ryou to do actually....  
  
Bakura kicked Ryou hard in the stomach which caused the boy to instinctively roll up into a ball and cry. This made Bakura to laugh out loud again at the youth's pathetic weakness that he couldn't even desperately handle through even if he tried as hard as he could.  
  
Then the ancient spirit took out a small knife from his pocket and held it up to the boy's throat. Ryou wished that someone would of helped him by now..he was getting really terrified.  
  
"I-I had e-enough." Ryou finally said shielding himself thinking that Bakura would hit him again.  
  
Bakura smirked evilly. "So you finally said something hikari . ." Bakura grinned again. "Just wait until tomorrow . . ." Bakura put the knife back into his pocket and kicked Ryou hard in the ribs for the last time before returning back into the millennium ring.  
  
Ryou was relieved that Bakura was finally gone. He continued to stay laying down on the floor. After awhile he finally decided to get up. After making sure for the last time that Bakura was completely gone he slowly got up, extreme pain shot through his entire body as it was too much for him to handle again. The boy almost fell back down to his knees, but he managed to get back up again. As he finally got back up he slowly strode himself up to his own room. The only thing now he could do was go to sleep and get ready for school tomorrow. Ryou thought he would never make it to school while in the condition he was in right now. The bruises he had really hurt and not to mention his face had a whole bunch of them.  
  
The white haired youth took the millennium ring off his neck and placed it on the table near the bed. Another tear ran down his face as Ryou slowly climbed into his bed and covered himself with the blanket. "What did I do...? Why does he do this to me...?"  
  
Soon his chocolate-colored eyes finally began to slightly close and he fell fast asleep. 


	2. You will never understand

Ryou groaned and slowly opened his heavy eyes, not long for him to realize that the pain from last night's beatings still ached his whole entire body. He was hoping it would be better in the morning, but it looked like the bruises got even worse. "Ugh. Morning already?" the white-haired boy rubbed his eyes and got off his bed. He started walked towards to the bathroom.  
  
He looked at himself in the mirror, seeing his own reflection. His jaw immediately dropped in shock. "Oh my god, how am I supposed to go to school like this?" his face wasn't only bruised, but his eyes were also swollen from all the crying. He opened the cabinet door and took a first aid kit out and covered the bruises with bandages on his cheek, arms, and legs as much as possible.   
  
Ryou lazily changed into his usual school uniform and finally walked out the house, closing the door behind him as it clicked softly. What he didn't notice was that he had left the millennium ring behind sitting on top of his desk...  
  
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Ryou sighed softly, sitting silently in his assigned seat. The teen's head bent back down to stare at his own both hands that seemed to tremble imperceptibly, slowly observing the scars and cuts Bakura gave him last night. His unfocused mind gradually drifted off to remembering exactly what had happened. "_Why? Why me? Just looking at all these scars he gave me... makes me wonder. What did I ever do to him? If only he just understood how I truely felt deeply inside..._" his mind suddenly snapped back to when he said those three words to him last night. "_Aishiteru_." Ryou's eyes slightly narrowed in confusion and shook his head. "_...Why did I tell him that last night? I don't even know for myself. No. No. I don't love him. What ever made me think that way? I could never forgive him for what such torture he put me through. Someday, I hope he finally disappears into the darkness forever for good so I could once be free again and live a normal life. I hate him. I hate him! I'v been patient for too long. Next time when he beats me, I'll be ready..._" Ryou screamed mentally to himself. Suddenly, it was hard for him to breathe and he noticed how thick his breathe had gotten everytime he tried breathing.  
  
"Boo!" A cheerful voice interrupted his thoughts. Two pairs of hands grabbed his shoulders. Startled, Ryou tensed and slowly turned his head around. It was Yuugi, one of his good friends. The short duelist couldn't help but only let out a cheerful and friendly smile.  
  
"Ryou, are you okay? You don't look well today." Yuugi frowned after noticing the teen's miserable face.  
  
"Oh no, I'm fine Yuugi... I just didn't get much sleep last night." Ryou gave out a small weak smile in return.   
  
"And what's this...?" Yuugi gently reached out to touch a bruise on Ryou's face which made the teen to move away slightly.  
  
"Oh, it's...nothing. Really." Ryou lied while looking away. He didn't like lying to Yuugi, but he knew if Bakura ever found out he told anyone he would yet go through another beating about 5 times worse than his regular ones.  
  
"Oh... um ok." Although, Yuugi still looked concerned for him. "Oh yeah, we have a math test today Ryou. I just wanted to remind you just in case you forgot." The tri-colored hair teenager smiled.   
  
"Oh, thanks for telling me." Ryou didn't know he had a test today at school---he realized that he'd forgotten about studying for it. "Great." he thought sarvastically to himself.  
  
Ryou didn't really do so well on the test, but almost everyone else did a pretty good job. He was still weak and his brain really wasn't working for him today. Luckily for him school was finally over for the day and he could finally go home and get some rest.  
  
"Hey Ryou, would you like to go to the arcade with us?" Yuugi asked cheerfully as both of the teens walked out the building.  
  
"Um, no, sorry Yugi. I have to go home early today because I'm, um, busy..." Ryou gave Yuugi a disappointment look.   
  
"Oh ok, maybe next time then." Yugi smiled.   
  
"Sure."  
  
Yuugi and his friends said goodbye to Ryou and he left them. Ryou walked home alone and quietly; he was getting hungry at the fact he didn't get to eat anything all day and it was also getting pretty dark outside so he had to pace up.  
  
With one final sigh he gently turned the entrance door knob -cautiously- and slowly opened it.  
  
"And where have you been..?" he heard a cold voice.  
  
Ryou then got attacked without any warnings even before he got the chance to even speak. Bakura pulled him into the living room and threw him down hard on the floor. Ryou groaned in pain while Bakura walked towards the small boy menacingly. He picked him up by the collar of his shirt. Bakura spoke quietly that seemed too quiet for anyone to even hear, but Ryou caught every single word loud and clear.  
  
"NEVER ever leave without this again..." Bakura said in a low dangerous voice while he held up the millennium ring close to the teen's face. Ryou's face instantly went pale as he noticed that he'd forgotten all about the millennium ring.  
  
"G-Gomen." Ryou studdered fearfully, but soon got punched in the face hard. Ryou held his cheek and looked at his yami in complete shock while tears started to well up in his brown eyes. Bakura only grinned cruelly before he pushed Ryou against the wall. Ryou then knew he was going to go through yet another beating of his life again.  
  
"_Oh God... not again. Please. Please._" Ryou begged silently, keeping his eyes shut tightly. But he finally remembered about what he reminded himself earlier this morning during at school. "_I'v been patient for too long. Next time when he beats me, I'll be ready..._" unexpectedly, Ryou eyes narrowed more coldly towards Bakura, and it was soon known that his crying had stopped so quickly.   
  
"Stop hiting me." he spoke more bravely. It may of seemed that he wasn't afraid of Bakura anymore, but a small amount of fear was also still in presence.  
  
"What did you say?! Don't you dare get an attitude with me you little worthless bastard!" Bakura raised a hand to violently slap Ryou across the face, leaving a big red mark on the right side of his cheek. The teen just about had enough of this.  
  
"Don't hit me!" Ryou shouted while allowing new tears to finally stream down his face. Bakura was amazingly surprised by Ryou's sudden outburst---he never heard the boy yell at him before. His shocked expression faded slowly and was soon replaced by a furious look of rage.  
  
Bakura then roughly grabbed the boy by the shoulders and shook him violently, making the boy more angry.  
  
"I SAID STOP NOW!" Ryou screamed loudly, shutting his eyes tightly. Silence then took over for a couple of minutes, until Bakura finally spoke.  
  
"Ah, I see you no longer fear of me." Bakura chuckled sinisterly. "Well... then that means I guess both of us will be having alot more fun from now on..." he grinned evilly.  
  
"You... you would never understand how I feel!" More tears started to run down his face and his voice soon broke.  
  
"Heh. What's this shit feeling?" Bakura smirked, crossing his arms over his chest while leaning and resting his back against the wall behind him.  
  
"It's... nothing." Ryou spoke more softly, shaking his head.   
  
"That you love me? Like what you've once said before? " Bakura interrupted rudely.  
  
Ryou looked at him with eyes more sorrowfully, but the soft expression on his face instantly faded as he grew frustrated again. "I don't love you..." he whispered lowly, a small tint of hate in his voice. "I hate you. I hope the darkness will consume your whole someday, leaving no trace of you left what so ever. And when that day finally comes... I'll be there to watch you die." Ryou spoke firmly, but still softly.  
  
The teen only laughed outloud in amusement, causing Ryou to stand there abit stunned. This was obviously only making the situation more worse. "Me? Die? I can't remember? I'm the darkness itself." Bakura grinned maliciously.   
  
"Yes, you are the darkness, but I would be more happy to see you suffer for once." Ryou didn't know for himself what he was really saying, but it didn't really concern him at the fact that he didn't really care about what would possibly happen to him if he continued any longer.  
  
"Kisama..." Bakura hissed lowly while the darker boy's emotionless dark brown eyes suddenly grew more colder again and void filled with blankness. "You'd better watch that tongue of yours if you wish to live." he warned more cautiously at the end.   
  
"Well... why can't you just kill me now then?" Ryou questioned. "You said I wasn't afraid of you anymore, so why don't you just go ahead and end it? It's better than dealing with your torturings all the time anyways. Why not just end it right now?" Ryou realized the truth that he didn't care anymore, he would rather die then to live with Bakura's abusive ways for the rest of his life.   
  
Bakura sneered sarcastically once more. "As much as I would love to... I can't." he smirked evilly, closing his eyes. "Of coarse, I still need this pathetic body of yours to finish what I'v started." Bakura then gave gim the death glare as he opened his eyes again. "Don't get in my way..." he warned dangerously.  
  
"Well, if your not going to do it now I will be leaving the house then." With that Ryou walked pass him. Bakura quickly spun around and grabbed one of Ryou's arms. "Where are you going?!" he yelled.  
  
"Why does it matter to you? You don't even care about me. I'm going out and I don't know when I'll be back..." Ryou shrugged off Bakura's grip on his arm and continued walking out the door, closing it shut tight behind him.  
  
"Weakling..." Bakura scoffed. He turned back on his heels and walked towards the boy's room, but suddenly stopped at the suspicious thought crossing his mind. "_...He said that he would rather be killed then to live through with my torturing... but I told him I would never let him die for the reason that I needed him._"He told himself lowly. "_Heh. It wouldn't happen anyways no matter how much he begged me. So... the only choice he would have left is to suffer through the pain I give him for the rest of his pathetic life..._" A crazy grin was placed upon the boy's smirking lips all along while his dark brown menacing eyes grew into smaller slits as he stared back directly at the previous door Ryou had closed a minute ago.  
  
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Meanwhile, Ryou was walking outside in the dark night. He couldn't barely see anything that well, but was glad at least the street lights were on. Ryou walked on the sidewalk, leading himself to wherever the path led him---he didn't really know where he was going, but he only wanted to get as far away from Bakura.  
  
It was cold and he didn't even have a coat. A strong wing blew by, tussling the boy's long white hair. Ryou shivered slightly and wrapped his arms around himself trying to make himself warmer, but he knew that it wouldn't really help anything.  
  
Ryou still continued to walk while another tear ran down his face. He sniffled and wiped the tears off with his hands. Ryou didn't like it when he cried; it always reminded him how Bakura said he was weak, but sometimes he couldn't help it at all.  
  
"_I wish he would understand me...if only he did.._" Ryou pondered. He saw a small bench nearby and decided to sit for awhile. his feet ached terribly from all the walking, so he decided to take a rest for a couple of minutes. Ryou let out a small sigh while he looked up at the bright moon. "I don't want to go back...." he murmured. "I hate him.."  
  
Although he said that he hated Bakura, it also appeared to be that Ryou still had a soft side to him, but for some reason he couldn't admit it---he was just too frustrated with Bakura that never understood what he was always trying to tell him. He always wanted to build a nice relationship between him and Bakura in the beginning, but it was obvious that it would never happen... so he had already given up months ago.

Suddenly, Ryou saw another shadow with his own sitting form, but the shadow seemed to be standing up behind him. _'that's weird_.'  
  
"Hello?" Ryou looked back frantically, but no one was there. He turned back to look at the shadow, but it wasn't there anymore.  
  
"_That's weird..I could of sworn i saw someone standing right behind me_." Ryou thought. He felt someone was near his presents, and it wasn't too long until he saw a dark form standing right infront of him menacingly...


	3. Do you care? Can I trust you?

"Who are...wait, Bakura? What are you doing here?? If your asking me to come back home you can just forget about it." Ryou only looked away trying to hide his tears.  
  
The dark shadow remained silent and stood still. It looked more taller, bigger, and he didn't have spiky long hair. Ryou studied the figure for awhile. His eye's widened. "Wait your not Bakura..who are-" all of a sudden the form put his hands over his mouth, causing him to let out a muffled scream.  
  
"Give me your money." the stranger ordered coldly.  
  
"I-I don't have any.." Ryou stuttered.  
  
"Well, that's just too bad because now I'm going to have to kill you." the person smirked evilly while mocking the boy. Ryou eye's widened in pure fear as he tried running away, but it was no use. The thug was too strong for him. Soon more forms appeared out of nowhere circling around the boy. Ryou whimpered more uncontrollably, frantically trying to escape from the grasp.  
  
"Get him!" one of them yelled. Ryou got punched in the stomach real hard making him spit out. Another one picked him up and threw him across making Ryou crash into a large pile of trash cans. All the thugs jumped onto the injured boy and started beating him up badly. Ryou was bleeding everywhere and he was too weak against all of them. It wasn't long until when one of them took out a long knife from his pocket and brought it up to the boy's throat, the other one held onto Ryou tightly and exposed the boy's long throat.   
  
"Any last words you little brat?" the thug laughed while bringing the knife closer to the boy's white flesh. Ryou was too terrified to even get anything out of his own mouth at the very moment from the shocking situation.  
  
"Well, I guess this is goodbye for you now kid." then the thug was about to slit the boy's throat until he saw another dark figure right infront of him. The man glared dangerously. The mysterious dark shadow snatched the knife away from the jerk's hand, causing the man to attack him. The mysterious person dodged it easily and punched the man in the face.   
  
Ryou was still down hurt badly, cringing in pain. He slowly opened his eyes trying to focus them, and he saw that the main that tried to kill him was down on the ground laying and groaning in pain. His eyes widened.  
  
"_Who_-" ryou asked himself while looking up at the mysterious person, who was still standing menacingly. It was pretty dark, so it was more difficult for him to recognize the figure. Although, it's features were slightly familiar to him that the teen could slightly some parts of the person's appearence. It appeared that he had long and messy hair, almost similiar to his own, but of coarse more wild. Wait, the only person that he knew that had that hair style would be no one other than Bakura. Ryou's eyes instantly went wide in pure shock. "_Why in the world would Bakura come here to save me_?" he thought suspiciously to himself. "_How did he even know where I went this entire time? Was he... following me_?" Ryou began panicking.  
  
Bakura sneered malicously, literally crushing the laying man's hand with his foot as the boy pushed harder and harder. The man screamed loudly in terrible pain. "Tsk,tsk... hurting a poor innocent child?" Bakura smirked at him. "No one is allowed to touch him... except by me, or else they'll die instantly." he whispered dangerously and more seriously. The man's eyes widened in terror.  
  
Turning his head, Bakura spotted the dagger laying beside him. He gently picked the sharp object off from the ground. He turned his attention back to the man beneath him, a evil grin shown spreading slowly across his lips. Bakura laughed and licked the metal blade with his tongue. The man's eyes widened in frantic horror, knowing well what was then coming for him.   
  
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Bakura licked and lapped the blood raveously from the man's flowing mouth. Others stared with shock expressions on their pale faces. The darker boy turned his neck around to face them with blank brown eyes, a thin line of the red substance trailing down from the corner of his lips.  
  
"W-W-Who the hell are you?" one of them growled. It was obvious a small amount of fear was given off.   
  
"He looks alot like that other punk we beat up." Another one pointed.   
  
"Who cares? He will be dead anyways soon." The other one replied back.  
  
All of them lunged towards bakura. Bakura just sighed and easily dodged every one of their attacks.   
  
"YOUR GOING TO PAY FOR THAT YOU BASTARD!" one of them threatened maliciously in frustration.  
  
"I don't think so. I think it's more like you who would be paying around here. You stupid bastards don't know what I really am, do you?" Bakura only grinned back at the man's foolish talk. This made the jerk more pissed off.  
  
"Shut up with the bluff you asshole, your going to die sooner anyways!" he ran up to Bakura and tried grabbing him from behind, but missed. Bakura on the other hand grabbed the man's wrist instead and twisted it easily, causing the bone to crack. The man screamed in pure agony which made the boy's grin to grow wider.  
  
Finally, Bakura shoved him down on the floor. The thug only scooted back, now afraid of him as there was the look of pure terror in his eyes now.   
  
Suddenly, the millennium ring around his neck began to glow brightly. The thug just moved backwards, frightened by the sight right infront of him.  
  
"What the hell-" the other one's eyes went wide. "W-What the hell is that thing?!"  
  
"Humans defeated by fear... how I love to see it." Bakura laughed insanely out loud while there was a crazy gleam in his eyes.   
  
"Shit! That guy is physco! RUN!!" one of them screamed his head off while running for his dear life, but tripped on something and fell back down clumsily. The others quickly ran up to him by helping him stand up on his feet again.  
  
"Too late now, your all going to hell." Bakura laughed again while the ring glowed more brightly, and he sent all of them to the darkness, not even leaving any one trace of them left in sight. Bakura only watched with amusement as the darkness slowly consumed and ate each and every one of their bodies.   
  
Ryou groaned quietly, slightly opening his eyes to gain his conscious back. Bakura head this, and turned his head around noticing that he boy was still in pain. He slowly walked towards the laying form, looking down at the teen, and then frowned in pity.  
  
"Baka... this is what happens when you don't listen to me..." Bakura mumbled annoyingly while staring down at the helpless boy.  
  
"I-I-I'm s-sorry Bakura that I r-ran off, t-this would of n-never h-happened if-" Ryou stuttered violently while shivering, terrified that he was expected to get another horrible beating when he goes home for running away from the house.  
  
"Shut up, I don't want to hear your damn apology." Bakura put a finger over his lips. Ryou was really shocked by this. "_Did Bakura come here to save me...?_"he thought to himself while looking up at his yami in awe. "_No..that can't be..how can he care about me all of a sudden. That's impossible_.." Ryou shook it off.  
  
"You can't walk..." Bakura muttered dissapointingly. Surprisingly, he carefully scooped up Ryou into his arms and carried him back home. Ryou tensed when Bakura picked him up, and shut his eyes tightly staying as still as possible. Ryou whimpered softly with pleading, gently resting his head and nuzzling the other boy's chest in begging and hoping somewhat that he wasn't in any deep trouble.   
  
Bakura frowned deepened when he felt Ryou tense in his arms. For some odd reason he wanted to only throttle the boy until he realized that he wasn't planning on hurting him, but knew that it would sort of defeat the purpose. He didn't even know for himself why he was acting this way towards the teen which he had never done before. It confused him greatly, but it really didn't concern right now at the fact that Ryou was even in worse shape than the usual beatings he would get from Bakura any day.  
  
"Relax, I'm not going to hurt you." Bakura said lightly, trying to calm the boy. His own soft voice surprised him a bit in realization.  
  
Ryou had stopped shaking slightly after hearing Bakura telling him that. He sighed a relief sigh, and continued to rest his head gently against Bakura's chest. "_C-Can I trust him? What if he's lying..._"  
  
"B-Bakura?" Ryou wasn't sure whether to speak or not.   
  
"I thought I told you to shut up." Bakura replied back while not even bothering to look down at his lighter half. Ryou just sighed a small one while he continued to let Bakura carry him back to the house.  
  
Bakura finally found the way going back to Ryou's house. He kicked the entrance door open and he set Ryou on the couch---he did this carefully so that he wouldn't hurt the injured boy more.  
  
"Stay here." Bakura left Ryou going to the restroom.  
  
Ryou just continued to lay down on the couch. He wondered where Bakura had went off to. "W-What is he doing..?" he thought to himself.  
  
It wasn't long until Bakura returned back, and Ryou soon noticed that he was carrying a first aid kit. Wait...a first aid kit? What was he possibly gonna do with that thing? He was curious what Bakura was going to do to him. Bakura took out some bandages and some alcohol. Ryou was really surprised by this. "W-W-What... is he doing?"  
  
"Roll up your sleeves." Bakura ordered.  
  
"What?" Ryou only gave him a puzzled look.  
  
"Didn't you hear me?" Bakura growled. Ryou nodded his head and did what Bakura told him to do.   
  
"What are you doing Bakura...?" the still confused Ryou asked the ex tomb-robber.   
  
"Why do you ask so many questions?" Bakura interrupted while getting a cotton from the aid kit and putting alcohol on it. "What does it look like? I'm disinfecting these wounds so you wouldn't get worse."  
  
"Now hold still...this might sting alittle." With that Bakura placed it on one of Ryou's bleeding wound. Ryou tried not to scream by biting his lower lip. He tried keeping his crys inside, but he couldn't really hold onto it much longer.  
  
"Ouch!" Ryou screamed out loud. "That hurt Bakura!" he shouted while jerking back away and holding onto his arm. He gently rubbed it in pain.  
  
"I told you it would hurt a little baka!" Bakura glared.   
  
"It hurt more like than alittle..." Ryou argued.   
  
"Awww, too bad weakling..." Bakura taunted and smirked evilly.   
  
"Why are you acting nice all of a sudden? You've never done this before even after you hurt me. Your starting to scare me...are you sure your okay?" Ryou made a worried expression.   
  
"I will be alot more scarier if you don't shut up with these foolish questions." Bakura growled. Ryou just listened to him and shut his mouth quickly.  
  
Ryou still couldn't believe the scene in front of him. The boy thought he was dreaming, but it seemed surely real enough to him; he just hoped this was true. Ryou thought he would never see the day 'Bakura' would ever do something like this for him.  
  
"Now hold still .. I'm not done." Bakura continued. Ryou couldn't help but keep on moving away. Bakura glared.  
  
"Hikari, I can't do this if you keep on moving away..."   
  
Ryou tried not to move too much, but he couldn't really help it. Bakura only sighed, knowing very well that the boy wouldn't listen to him no matter how many times he was forced to tell him.  
  
Bakura grabbed the his hand and placed it on his own arm.  
  
"Here. Squeeze my arm whenever it hurts." Bakura let him do this so it would be alot more easier. Bakura continued disinfecting the wounds. Ryou winced and cringed cautiously, still trying to keep his crys inside, and he was also struggling through the attempt to not squeeze Bakura's arm afraid that it would anger him.   
  
About half an hour Bakura had finally done his job. Ryou had alot more bandages than he had before. They covered his arms, legs, and face. The bleeding had finally stopped, so he was relieved.   
  
"Your lucky I saved your ass today. You owe me a big one." Bakura crossed his arms and smirked.   
  
"B-Bakura? Um, why did you do this for me-" Ryou sat up from the couch continuing to say, but got cut off by Bakura.  
  
"Why does it matter? I saved your life and that's all that matters." Bakura replied back harshly before walking off. Ryou was speechless, continuing to sit silently on the couch.   
  
"You need rest now. You have school tomorrow. Go to sleep..." Bakura helped the injured boy up to his room. Ryou climbed into his bed and pulled the covers over himself.   
  
"Y-Yami?" Ryou spoke softly.   
  
"What?" Bakura replied back coldly while stopping on his way out. "T-Thanks for what y-you did t-today." Ryou smiled weakly as he felt nervous afterwards to what he had just said.   
  
"Chh." Bakura only scoffed back, and retreated back into his soul room. Ryou sighed mentally to himself in mild depression.   
  
#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&  
  
_...I-I can't believe what I judt did for the little bastard! Am I seriously starting to get soft here? No... that can't be. I'm the darkness... I have no heart. Not even for my him. I'll kill him when the time comes...but, not now. He was lucky today that I saved his ass from those punks... if it wasn't for me he would of been dead by now. I just hope he learned his lesson to never run away from me ever again, because if he ever does again... I'll make sure to make him go through hell like he's never before. He just better watch out next time...   
  
Bakura smirked wildly into the darkness._


	4. I'm beginning to see

It was early morning the next day. Ryou wasn't awake from his slumber. The sound of the boisterous alarm clock sitting beside his small desk made loud noises, however, it seemed not to even wake the boy up. Instead, Ryou moaned and groaned softly in his sleep. Sweat was shown, trailing down his face and chin. He had a small fever, but it wasn't as serious compared concerning to what the problem was. It wasn't really difficult for him to wake usually, but it appeared something wasn't right...  
  
Hearing the noise, Bakura went to the boy's room. He walked towards him, turned his head to the beeping alarm clock, and in frustration mixed with annoyance he breaked the object with his bare fist. It finally stopped making noises. Satisfied, he then slowly drew his attention back to the sleeping teen beneath him. He frowned in disgust.  
  
"Couldn't you hear the damn thing by now? Now... wake up." he ordered coldly.  
  
Ryou groaned again softly and covered his head with the covers. "Go away... I don't feel too good." he spoke weakly and softly. Although, Bakura obviously didn't take this so easily.   
  
"I SAID WAKE UP!" with that Bakura forcefully grabbed the covers, harshly taking them off of the shivering teen right infront of him. His facial expression then changed dramatically as soon as he saw the poor boy's sick looking pale face.   
  
"Oi, what's wrong with you...?" Bakura asked while raising an eyebrow, now more suspicious and curious instead of furious.  
  
"...Bakura?" the boy called out to the darker boy with his eyes still halfway closed, mouth slightly opened. Bakura remained silent and continued looking down at him. Ryou slowly sat up from his bed, now letting his arms resting on the sides. "Bakura... I don't feel so well..." Ryou groaned holding his forehead in pain.   
  
"That's not my problem." Bakura spat back rudely.   
  
It even surprised him by the unexpected situation that Ryou then couldn't hold onto it much longer. The whole room was spinning around and around, and he realized exactly what was going to come next. He tried holding it in, but instead failed. He threw up all over the other boy's blue and white stripped shirt.  
  
"W-What the hell?! What are you doing?!" Bakura backed up while all the 'puke' was dripping off from his shirt.  
  
"Bakura, I-I'm sorry, but I don't think I can go to school today..."   
  
"...You really are sick, aren't you?" Bakura demanded softly, a sharp edge to his voice. Ryou reached out and touched Bakura's arm and grasped them. He didn't know why, but Ryou felt grateful for Bakura's discovery.  
  
Bakura growled at the contact and swiftly pulled away, causing the boy to almost lose his own balance over the bed. "What the hell are you doing?!" Ryou's happiness faded.   
  
"I just thought… well if you knew that if something was wrong with me… that you'd take care of me." Bakura broke out into a cold laugh.   
  
"What makes you think I would do that?" Bakura paused to let out another sharp laugh. Ryou stared at him with sorrowful brown eyes that expressed strong emotion of pleading and sadness.   
  
"Please bakura? Just for today..." Ryou asked weakly again.  
  
Bakura stared at him with a cold glare once more before finally deciding on the decision. "Fine. But, your going to the hospital instead. I'm not doing this alone." he told him coldly.  
  
"T-Thanks." Ryou smiled.  
  
Ryou got ready and Bakura walked him to the hospital, luckily it was really close to his house so Ryou was really relieved...otherwise, he wouldn't of asked Bakura to take him there if it was a long way. He knew the boy would spaz out and throw a fit complaining about how too far away it is. Ryou also agreed with Bakura that he knew he couldn't continue staying home, the fact that he already knew that Bakura wouldn't really take care for him and obviously he couldn't take care of himself for the reasion that he was too sick.   
  
Bakura and Ryou entered the building. Bakura saw alot of people walking around---he didn't really know what to do so he just went up to some random person he saw walking towards both of them.  
  
"Um, he's not feeling well right now and he needs help..." Bakura said to the person. The young man turned around and gave him the odd look.  
  
"Um, are you talking to me? I don't work here...why don't you go up to one of the nurses and tell them, like that girl in white clothing." The man pointed and tried not to laugh.  
  
"Oh, um, arigato..." Bakura spoke pretending as if like Ryou would be polite to anyone else. He mumbled something under his breath while leaving the man.   
  
This time, the frustrated boy walked up to the woman in white clothing. "He's really sick right now and he needs help. Quick." Bakura explained flatly to the nurse.   
  
"Who? You?" the nurse asked the darker boy while tilting her head in confusion.  
  
"No! you foolish-" Ryou quickly gave him a small glare. Bakura cleared his throat and tried to keep his 'cool' this time, explaining it once again in a better way. "No, I'm talking about him." the slightly taller boy said while looking down at Ryou, acting like he was concerned.  
  
"Oh... him. Sorry about the the mistake earlier... is he your brother?" the nurse smiled.  
  
"....Yes, he's my little brother." Bakura paused between some words. Ryou only gave him a very weird expression. Bakura glared back at him with the look of expressing to him that he knew well what he was doing, Ryou got the point and sighed out loud.  
  
"What's your name?" the young lady asked nicely.  
  
"Ryou." Ryou weakly smiled back.  
  
"Well, here Ryou, come this way. your rooms this way." The nurse insisted Ryou to follow her. The boy just followed behind her with Bakura carefully helping him right by his side.  
  
#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&  
  
"This is your room. If you need anything in particular just tell me what you need." the girl smiled. "Oh, and wear this." She handed Ryou some light blue hospital pajamas.  
  
"Thank you ma'am..." Ryou bowed polietly. With that, the nurse finally left the two boys standing outside the room.  
  
Ryou changed into his new clothes that the nurse had given him, and he climbed onto the bed. He head hit the soft white pillow beneath him, pulling the blankets over him. Bakura, completely speechless, only watched him doing this.   
  
Bakura scoffed. "Are you happy now...? I'm leaving." Bakura was about to leave the boy in the room, but soon suddenly felt a warm hand grabbing onto his own wrist. Bakura, surprisingly startled, immediately stopped at his own tracks as soon as he felt the teen's hand caress his own in plead.   
  
"Um, Bakura, can you please stay with me for awhile? I don't want to be all alone here." Ryou asked softly. He didn't know why for himself, but at the very moment he actually wanted Bakura to be with him for the first time ever. He didn't want Bakura to leave him for some odd reason, but Bakura didn't notice it.   
  
Bakura continued to stand there silently with his back still turned from the teen, but surprisingly he never jerked his hand away from Ryou's. He finally glanced back at the teen behind him... and his eyes suddenly softened slightly for the first time. "_W-Why does he look so innocent?_" There were something about those eyes that slightly fascinated a part of him for awhile currently at the moment, but usually it never did before so it shocked him at the fact.  
  
"Fine. I'm leaving soon..." Bakura slowly walked towards the bed, and sat beside the boy.   
  
Yet again, he didn't know why, but Ryou soon found out that he suddenly had an urge to just sit up and crawl over to him by resting his head on the other boy's shoulder. Although he was still thankful for what Bakura did for him, and he thought it was actually a 'nice' thing that he had done for the first. The teen rested his head on the his shoulder, sighing softly.   
  
"W-What the hell are you doing? Get off me. Now." Bakura commanded coldly, but his harsh expression faded as soon as he felt Ryou gently touch his arm again.  
  
"...I just wanted to thank you for bringing me here." Ryou thanked softly. For the first time, he smiled at his own evil darker half with his sweet look. "And...well, the thought just triggered from what happened last night. And I also thank you for saving my life. I never really got the chance to tell you that much."   
  
Bakura growled. "...Your damn right I came to save you. Otherwise, you would of been dead by now."   
  
"I-I'm sorry. It was all my fault Bakura. I should of never run out the house in the first place... then we wouldn't of had gone through the trouble." Ryou apologized.  
  
"Heh. Those bastards weren't any trouble for me. I easily sent all of them to hell and they can't ever return." Bakura smirked evilly.   
  
"But... it was still my fault. I made you come for me because of it. I-I could of been killed last night. I was so terrified; I really thought I was going to die.." Ryou suddenly felt his voice break." Suddenly, he buried his face into Bakura's chest and started crying softly, begging somewhat he wanted to be forgiven from what happened. "I-I'm s-so sorry..."  
  
Confused, Bakura only remained silent and turned his neck to face the crying teen beside his left shoulder. He didn't yell, didn't push him off, or even hurt him, surprisingly. Without a second thought, he hesitantly gathered the trembling boy into his own arms. Ryou's eyes widened in pure shock, before relaxing into the embrace. 'W-What the hell am I doing right now?" his eyes widened in realization. _'Might as well screw the whole I'm-your-worst-nightmare thing now_.' Bakura frowned to himself. "_But... he feels so warm right now... what is this feeling...?_"  
  
Ryou was completely blown away---he never expected Bakura to actually even touch him, especially a real hug given back to him, but... being held by the other teen just made him feel protected by him for the first time.  
  
"Hey, you can stop crying now..." Bakura murmured annoyingly, but gently. "I get your point."  
  
Ryou didn't stop, but only continued crying into him and Bakura felt warm liquid hit his bare arm. Sighing softly, Bakura slowly pulled him closer into his chest for the boy to become more comfortable, gently rubbing his back. "...It's fine. I'll.... I'll protect you from any danger." Bakura felt like he had just said the most hardest sentence in his life. He was showing weakness for the first time… but for some reason, he didn't care right now. Although it wasn't that difficult since he also had that other excuse to use that he knew well what the boy also knew what he was talking about. For now... he only wanted Ryou to think the other obvious choice besides the secret emotion Bakura was also experimenting through at the same time.   
  
Ryou couldn't believe his ears. His heart felt like it was going to explode. From what emotion, Ryou wasn't able to tell. But it sure was not hatred. Had Bakura just said those words? But of coarse, he only knew what Bakura was trying to tell him, that he still needed 'his' body. But he didn't care about that now since he was enjoying Bakura's new treatment towards him.

"Now... get off of me." the old attitude had returned back to Bakura's harsh voice once more, but it wasn't too long until he found that the boy had already fallen fast asleep peacefully against his chest for support and while Ryou's hand gripped onto his shirt.

"Ugh." he growled quietly in disgust. "Your such a weakling. You do know that, right?"

Silence.

Bakura sighed once more. The darker boy slowly took his light off his body and gently laid him onto the bed that both of them were sitting on---he did this carefully so he wouldn't accidentally wake Ryou up. Ryou groaned softly as his head hit the pillow beneath him. Bakura looked back at the window, and noticed the stormy weather outside. The heavy rain pounded loudly against the window glass. Bakura then drew his attention back to the sleeping boy right beside him, and watched Ryou's chest rise and fall with rythmatic breathing with silence.

The boy's eyes began closing. He was tired; he wasn't sleeping well lately. What was the reason? He didn't even know for himself why though. Alot of things were on his mind these days, but he couldn't bring it out that clearly. Yet, he was still greatly confused as well...

Bakura stared down at the sleeping teen again with unemotional, but cold eyes.

Could it be because of.... him?


	5. Your hesitant

Ryou was greeted by the morning sunlight the next early morning, the dusty reflection coming through the glass window already gave his white locks tinted with a small faint of lavendar a bright golden glint color to the soft and silky hair. He awoke early the next day finding himself still being kept at the hospital.  
  
He yawned loudly and tiredly stretched his arms out. Ryou didn't feel anything much different than before, but at least he was feeling alittle better than yesterday...  
  
Ryou's half-way closed eyes glanced curiously around the room, to soon unexpectedly notice that a uncertain familar form was laying down right next to his own. He arched his sore neck closer to get a more better observation at the motionless body, and his eyes soon widened in shock as the boy finally recognized the sleeping body.  
  
...It was Bakura sleeping peacefully. His head rested relaxingly on top of his own folded arms beside the teenager's small bed. The boy continued to stare amusingly at his darker half; he studied his yami's slow rythmatic breathing as he followed the small raisings and fallings of the other's slim body with his own stiff brown eyes without any blinking what so ever, expressing what it looked like he was watching and expecting to instantly find any sudden movements from the other's obvious actions. Nothing. He only saw Bakura twitch slightly, also along with the small quiet whimper that the boy just easily heard.   
  
The soft and gentle expression that was presently casted upon his yami's usual angry face surprised him a bit. Yet, the evil boy looked alot like himself when he slept. The youth slowly reached his hand out to lightly and carefully trace the new fragile features with his fingers as sudden, but gentle emotion took within him while he was still greatly confused by the sight right in front of him. Bakura flinched lightly at the touch. He just wished that Bakura looked like this more often towards him, but he already knew that it was only for temporarily.   
  
Ryou was also surprised that he was unexpected to find Bakura sleeping beside his bed; something that the teen had never done before. Ryou hesitantly tapped Bakura's shoulder, unsure of himself whether if he had shouldn't or have done it, obviously, it was already too late. However, Bakura didn't respond back, but only groaned quietly.  
  
"Bakura...?" Ryou whispered. Bakura still didn't say anything. He gently shook him. Again, nothing. Ryou then knew what he had to do next.  
  
"BAKURA!" Ryou screamed out loudly. Gasping, he quickly slapped both of his hands over his mouth in surprising realization. This made Bakura jump from the sudden outburst in complete shock. Ryou couldn't help but lightly giggle after seeing the boy's awkward and unusual reaction. He had to agree on himself that it appeared hilarious.  
  
"What?!" Bakura shouted with extreme annoyance, not even recognizing who the person that just called his own name out. "Oh. it's only you..." came his more calm tone from his previous one as he just realized that ryou was already awake before him.  
  
"...Bakura? What were you doing sleeping beside me? I thought you told me you were leaving." Ryou asked curiously.  
  
"...What? What are you talking about baka?" Bakura asked bluntly while rubbing one of his eyes with his hands.   
  
"Well, when I woke up... I saw that you were sleeping next to me..." Ryou told the still confused Bakura.  
  
"Oh... did I." Bakura replied back sarcastically.  
  
"Um, yeah." Ryou still didn't know what was going on.  
  
"I took alittle nap last night, but I must of forgotten to wake up..." Bakura grumbled annoyingly.  
  
"Wait, did you say that you slept beside me? So does that mean you were watching over me for the whole entire night then?" Ryou's mouth opened more slightly at the thought.  
  
"...What?! Don't say crap like that! What are you talking about?!" Bakura could instantly feel his own flushed face burning up from the sudden blush that just unexpectedly appeared out of nowhere. Ryou was slightly disappointed. He would of been happy if Bakura did this for him, but of coarse... he knew Bakura still didn't really care about him.  
  
Bakura cursed something under his breath while harshly grabbing the millennium ring off the table. He put it around his neck carelessly.  
  
"W-Where are you going Bakura?" Ryou asked curiously while Bakura began walking out of the room.   
  
"None of your business." Bakura said back harshly while looking over past his shoulder to eye the boy with a small unemotional glare. "...I need to be alone for a second." He spoke more softly at the end.  
  
"Oh, okay, but promise you'll come back soon. Okay?" Ryou smiled at him sweetly.   
  
"Whatever. Shut up," Bakura growled before walking out.  
  
"_I wonder where he's going..._" Ryou thought suspiciously.  
  
Meanwhile, Bakura was only outside Ryou's room just sitting in one of the chairs that were in the hallway pondering to himself. "_...Okay. Did I sleep with him last night?! I can't believe I didn't even know about it in the beginning! Damn it, I should of never even been by his side, then none of this wouldn't of happened! What have I done to myself? Now he definitely knows that somethings up. I mean... of coarse, I was tired, but..._"  
  
"Um..excuse me Mr. Ryou? What are you doing out here?" He heard a familiar high voice say up just above his sitting form.  
  
Bakura glared deathly up at the person who just interrupted his own private thoughts, his sharp deadly eyes expressed strong annoyance seemingly about ready to kill and torture the person who just bothered him.  
  
"Oh, your the other older brother. Sorry again." the girl apologized. Bakura only ignored her and growled to himself silently.  
  
"Why are you out here all by yourself? Aren't you going to stay with him in there?" the young lady smiled.  
  
"I was just thinking about something, but why are you here?" Bakura asked back coldly.  
  
"Oh, I just wanted to give this to him." She showed him a tray full of all different kinds of food. Bakura's eyes went wide as the girl brought it up to his face.  
  
"I thought he might be hungry since he really didn't get to eat anything, so I brought him this." She smiled again.  
  
"Oh, I... see."  
  
"Oh! hey you, I'm alittle busy right now I'v got other things to do so could you please take care of this instead and feed it to him for me? Thanks." the nurse handed Bakura the tray quickly and ran off leaving even before Bakura got the change to say anything. He began stuttering.  
  
Bakura stood there, not even bothering to move a single muscle while still holding the food tray in his hands. "_feed him? FEED HIM?!_" he screamed mentally at himself. "That stupid girl. What am I supposed to do with this thing?" Bakura bent down to sniff the food beneath him. "What the hell is all this...?" Bakura placed a disgusted expression on his face. Bakura found a trash can nearby, carelessly, he threw the food into it as it made a mess. "Ryou dosen't need this crap." Bakura wiped his dirty hands off on his shirt. "I can even find something more suitable than that shit..." Bakura knew Ryou had to eat something at the fact that the teen hadn't eaten anything at all, so he mumbled something while going off to search for some things that he could probably find in the meantime.  
  
Bakura continued walking through the hallways until something finally caught his eye. He saw a young boy that looked about 8 years old sitting down on a chair about to eat a cup of ramen. Bakura obviously didn't know what it was since he couldn't take a better glance, but he only knew it seemed much better than that other nasty hospital food he got rid of awhile ago.   
  
Bakura finally decided for himself as he started walking up to the small boy, a small smirk spreading across his lips. He snatched it away from the little boy's hand without even feeling guilty. "I'd have to thank you for having this in the first place..." Bakura scoffed.  
  
"Hey! Gimme back my food now!" the boy shrieked frantically. He walked towards Bakura, kicking him extremely hard in the shins for a little runt.   
  
"Owww!" Bakura screamed out in horrible pain. He almost dropped the bowl, but actually managed to hold onto it.   
  
The little boy ran over and climbed up the white haired boy, sitting on top of the his shoulders. He began frantically pulling hard on Bakura's strands of white hair while crying loudly.  
  
"I said gimme back my lunch you big. Meany. White haired. Freak!" the boy screeched again. Bakura struggled trying to get the little boy off of him.  
  
"GET...OFF...OF ME!" Bakura tried to grab the kid from behind, but missed clumsily.  
  
"NOT UNTIL YOU GIVE ME BACK MY FOOD!!!" the boy was crying boisterously while he pulled and stretched Bakura's sore face. "Ohhh, what's that?" something fascinating caught the boy's eyes. The boy quickly got off of him and excitedly ran over to the snack bar machine.   
  
"Hey! These snacks are way better!" the boy gleed happily as he inserted the quarters into the vending machine. The little boy began dancing around happily while Bakura still held his face in pain. Bakura may have won the battle, but he got hurt badly by the little runt.   
  
"Damn kid... I should kill him for what he did to me." Bakura growled while rubbing his head, then his thoughts suddenly went back to Ryou. "_I still need to go back to him.... I'll take care of the little bastard when I return back later_." he smirked before walking off.  
  
#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&  
  
Ryou sighed unpatiently. He had been expecting on Bakura to arrive back earlier than he had thought, but it appeared that it was taking his yami forever. Ryou wrapped his arms around his legs and slowly brought them up to chest. "_I wonder where he went. What's taking him so long? Did he... go home and leave me here_?" Ryou sighed disappointingly. His thoughts went back earlier from when he found that Bakura had fallen asleep beside his bed this morning. Ryou was still speechless and surprised from the situation, even the fact that Bakura told him that it was all a misunderstanding, Ryou still had a small suspicious concern that hid inside some part of him all along. Ryou, even surprised for himself, had started beginning to actually like him starting over the couple of days.   
  
But... even how Bakura was acting these days made him more and more suspicious everyday. It appeared to him that everything had suddenly changed so dramatically. He still wondered, thinking what the possible outcome might of caused the reason, but he wasn't so sure for himself at the same time. Ryou knew that Bakura was struggling through something, but again, he didn't know what. But the only thing he had noticed was that Bakura had been acting as if he was really hesitant towards him ever since the night he got attacked by the gangs that Bakura had killed.   
  
Ryou's thoughts were interrupted when he heard someone walking in. It was him.  
  
"Oh Bakura. Where have you been? I was wondering where you went." Ryou frowned.  
  
"Why do you always have to be nosey? It's none of your business." Bakura murmured angrily.  
  
"Oh.... and what's that?" Ryou stared curiously at the object that Bakura was holding onto.  
  
"Oh, this is... for you. The nurse told me to give this to you." Bakura lied suspiciously, denying that it was really him who found it in the first place. He slowly walked towards the white haired teen.  
  
"T-Thanks." Ryou smiled, extending his fingers out to gently take the cup from the boy's hand. Ryou took the chopsticks in his hands to take a small bite out of it, but suddenly felt embarrassed by the fact that he soon noticed that Bakura was watching him doing this all along. Ryou blushed slightly before taking another small bite, but accidentally spilled it all over on himself, although he wasn't really paying much attention. "Ahh!"  
  
"You are such a clutz, you know that?" Surprisingly, Bakura only chuckled lightly in humor while shaking his head before walking over to Ryou to quickly take some napkins off the table, helping the boy clean up the mess off him. Ryou lifted his head slowly, staring at the other teen in somewhat awe while Bakura continued helping him clean the mess from his shirt. "_D-Did he.... just laugh at me? Of caorse, not in the evil way, but... a real geuine one_?"  
  
"...What?" Bakura finally asked curiously after realizing that Ryou had been staring at him for awhile now.  
  
"Oh, it's nothing. Really," Ryou blinked then smiled innocently. "Um, look Bakura, you don't have to do this for me. I can handle it." he tensed.  
  
"Why? So you could make the same dumb mistake?" Bakura rolled his eyes. "You can't even feed yourself."   
  
"Err… you don't really have to help-" Ryou started but was cut off by a low growl from Bakura.  
  
"Just hand me the damn thing," the yami demanded and Ryou flinched as he handed over the food in delight. Bakura snatched it from his hikari's extended hand. To Ryou's complete shock, and perhaps Bakura's as well, the bowl was lifted closely to Ryou's chin. The small hikari became practically frozen in shock.   
  
"W-W-What are you doing?" Ryou glanced back down at the food and back to Bakura.  
  
"What does it look like baka, I'm feeding you." Bakura sighed. Ryou was still really shocked by this.  
  
"Um, Bakura, you don't have to. Really," Ryou stuttered.  
  
"Don't argue with me." Bakura glared. "Here, just shut your trap and let me do this,"  
  
Ryou gently nodded.  
  
"Now, open your mouth." Bakura told him. Ryou didn't feel somewhat comfortable Bakura doing this for him. For Bakura to act like this towards him... didn't sound like his own evil self. Ryou was completely blown away yet again by the situation right in front of his own eyes. Ryou was speechless once again.  
  
"Well, are you going to eat it or not?" Bakura insisted impatiently and Ryou broke out of his trance as he started slowly opening his mouth, fearing that Bakura might do something, instead, he felt the food gently touch his tongue. The white-haired teen couldn't help his face from lighting up, a small grin breaking through. And for some reason, Bakura had the urge to return the favor. Ryou began chewing his food quietly as Bakura continued helping him.  
  
Unexpectedly, Ryou started feeling dizzy again like the other day when he woke up. He stopped eating the food beneath him and the surroundings around him and Bakura sitting in front of him blured his vision. He began to sweat again. Bakura knew something was going on by the expression on his sick face. "B-Bakura..." he groaned softly.  
  
"What's wrong?" Bakura's eyes slightly widened. Ryou dazed weakly while his eyes flickered close. He suddenly collapsed, falling towards his yami exhaustedly, but Bakura quickly caught him in time as he dropped the food out of his hands, causing it to spill all over on the tile floor beneath them.  
  
"What's wrong?!" Bakura shouted frantically to his the teen while still holding the lifeless boy in his arms.  
  
Complete silence.  
  
Ryou only leaning against him weakly with his eyes still closed.  
  
"He's....he's sick again." Bakura's eyes widened. 


	6. What are you hiding?

Chapter 7 - What's going on?  
  
  
  
Bakura sighed mentally to himself as he walked over to the small sink to wet the small washcloth with cool water.   
  
He returned back to Ryou's bed putting the small wet towel on top of the white haired youth's burning forehead. The tomb-robber sat next to his hikari on the small bed. The youth was sweating and moaning quietly in his sleep, this made Bakura more concerned for the boy.  
  
  
  
Ryou's darker half brushed the teenager's bangs aside that were covering his sweaty face.   
  
// Ryou, What's wrong with you . . . // Bakura watched his hikari struggling in his sleep. It looked like Ryou just couldn't quit shifting around so much. Bakura took one of his hikari's hand and began stroking it gently. This made the boy slightly calm down a bit..  
  
//Where's that damn nurse when you need her..// The white haired devil assiduously mumbled something under his breath while he pulled the covers up closer to his hikari. Bakura grabbed the small washcloth nearby and started dabbing it lightly on Ryou's forehead getting rid of the sweats.  
  
"..Don't. Onegai..."  
  
Suddenly, Bakura stopped continuing what he was just doing. He looked down at the smaller boy just giving a weird expression as he continued staring at the boy intently not even knowing about what the younger teenager was talking about in his sleep. Bakura mentally just shrugged it off continuing what he was doing before . . .  
  
"L-Leave me alone..don't..hit me..please...." Ryou studdered while turning his head from side to side resistfully and whimpering soon later turning them into small raged gasps at the end.  
  
//Nani . . .// Bakura thought to himself as he quietly continued listening to his lighter half's frantic pleadings carefully again..  
  
Soon, Bakura could notice a small tear slowly making its way down the boy's pale face leaving a small glinted trail behind on the soft white skin.  
  
"No..no..Don't." The white haired teen repeated again. "Leave me alone..don't touch me..onegai."  
  
More tears began to run down his cheek landing down on the soft blanket beneath his face as they formed small dark wet spots on the light covers.  
  
Bakura hesitantly but slowly reached his hand out towards to touch and caress the other boy's face . . . gently brushing Ryou's cheek over the smooth soft skin with his thumb getting rid of the tears. Bakura managed to keep his composure from the sudden reaction even though he hated admitting to what he was just doing.  
  
Ryou's face now cupped in his darker halfs warm hands..he still continued to whimper in his sleep but he calmed down a bit.  
  
//What is he dreaming about..? Why does he sound so frightened..wait, is..he...dreaming about me..?" the ex tomb-robber's eyes slightly grew wide now recognizing and realizing that Ryou would say something similar to the things he was saying right now whenever he would get hurt by Bakura. His eyes focused back on the sick youth again now revealing them that he wasn't planning on hurting the poor boy..his mouth slight opened from the surprise.  
  
"...I love you yami..please d-don't hurt me..."  
  
Shocked, Bakura stood speechless just looking down at the boy again.  
  
"..Aishiteru..." Ryou's talkings now lowered a few notches turning them into small whispers at the end as he calmed down sleeping peacefully again.  
  
"Hikari..?" The older boy blinked a several times as he waited for a couple of seconds expecting if the boy would say something else again.   
  
Nothing. The boy had drifted off to slumber again. Bakura contently watched as Ryou's chest raised and fell with his rhythmatic breathing.   
  
Relieved that the boy was doing ok again...Bakura sighed a soft and quiet one. He pulled Ryou closer to his own body and cradled him in his wrapped arms around the younger one's shoulders. He brushed a small strand of hair away from the other's face.  
  
Bakura glazed down at the boy's pale face; he just carefully studied his hikari's angelic face as if the boy's amusing expression was seemingly drawing the other's attention. The teen's still face revealingly expressed softness and pure innocence which even surprisingly made the other to just continue to intently stare down at him, now realizing that the younger one's lips were slightly revealingly opened. Bakura actually felt sorry for him for once; he didn't really enjoy seeing Ryou like this. Not even noticing the sudden urge desire of his own body wanting to suddenly move closer to his other half Bakura closed his eyes while he slowly lowered his head to the other's to plant a small gentle kiss on them; he lightly brushed his own soft lips against the youth's for a couple of times and allowed one of his hands to slowly explore the boy's face by caressing the smooth soft skin. He finally broke the kiss as he pulled away, his eyes soon went wide by the new feeling that he had never experienced before in his life except from his own evil self; he noticed that the new weird emotion was an anomoly from all the other ones of himself. Suddenly surprised by his own actions, Bakura quietly gasped, quickly pulling his face away from Ryou's now just realizing what he was doing for the teen. What was this new feeling? Why did it felt really strange and why did it easily shock him so much? It didn't really make any sense to him and he couldn't understand any of its whole purpose. Could this really be the 'love' that his hikari was trying to tell him him about for all these months. . .and these other pathetic humans that adored so much? It all came back to him as he just remembered the same related scene when he had stayed with the boy on that one night .. he remembered all the comforting touches and strokes that he had given to Ryou, even also all before that. Aiding his injured wounds whenever he got attacked by those bullies, feeding him when he couldn't do it for himelf, and now this. It was all the same exact feeling that had been haunting him for the past couple of days. . .  
  
Bakura's rapid breaths grew more heavier and sweats trailed down his delicate features. The thoughts repeatedly wandered through his own confusing and blank mind. He desperately struggled to get rid of it while he quickly held onto his own head in both of his uncontrollable hands, his body slightly shaking as he felt his own head pounding violently; it only made him more dizzy. .  
  
He shakily stepped back a few steps from the bed, slightly shaking his head in an attempt to clear his own thoughts.  
  
// Hikari..I-I can't do this... // his cold and calm voice was back again in presence.   
  
He closed his narrowed eyes while looking away from the boy with his fisted hands shaking slightly. // I-I just can't . . . // his voice was just above a whisper as he was about to lose his own control. .  
  
Just then Yugi and Yami entered the room.  
  
Bakura glared back at the person who just disturbed, but his eyes softened more after realizing that it was only the pharaoh with his little hikari by his side. Yugi just stared at the scene that was right infront of him speechless.  
  
"What are YOU doing here pharaoh . . ?" the fiend hissed at the taller boy.  
  
"We came here to see Ryou, is he sick??" Yami narrowed his eyebrows.  
  
"None of your business.." Bakura scoffed back coldly.  
  
"Ryou! What happened?!" the tri-colored hair teenager exclaimed while running over to his school friend desperately. "I didn't see Ryou at school today and I also tried calling his house but he wasn't home either, so we thought maybe he might be sick at the hospital instead.." Yugi told the tomb-robber feeling sorry for his friend.  
  
". . But why are you here Bakura?" the taller Yugi interrupted his hikari.  
  
" . . Ryou wanted me to stay with him for awhile because he didn't want to be alone by himself . . so I decided to stay for alittle bit." the white-haired devil told the pharaoh while looking down at his lighter half.  
  
"You what . . ?" Yugi's eyes widened while his law literally dropped glancing back at the ex tomb-robber.  
  
"Didn't you hear what I said baka??" Bakura glared at both of them getting annoyed by all these questions that were being asked.  
  
"G-Gomen.." Yugi muttered apologizing. Bakura only crossed his arms over his chest.  
  
"Bakura, why are you acting different all of a sudden towards Ryou?" the pharaoh's voice was low and dangerous thinking what the tomb-robber was probably up to...  
  
"..Nani? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?! URESEI!!" the furious Bakura shouted making the little Yugi jump slightly.  
  
"Is the 'evil' spirit of the ring finally starting to show his soft side towards his hikari at last . . . ? Or is he up to something . . .?" Yami taunted the ex tomb-robber while smirking confidently crossing his arms.  
  
A muscle in Bakura's neck twitched as he angrily gritted his teeth together. "You better watch your tongue around me pharaoh..if you wish to live to still see your precious hikari." Bakura gave the pharaoh the death glare.  
  
"It wouldn't be so easy to kill me.." Yami informed.  
  
"Oh..is that so? Then how 'bout another duel to the death?" the spirit smirked at the pharaoh while sneering.  
  
"Another me, please stop this. This isn't really helping anything.." Yugi sighed at his yami. "Sorry aibou.." his darker half apologized keeping his head down staring at the floor.   
  
Bakura suddenly stood up from the bed that he was sitting on.  
  
"W-Where are you going Bakura?" Yugi asked Ryou's darker half while looking up at him with those big violet orbs.  
  
"I'm going now .. tell Ryou that I went home already when he wakes up later from his sleep." Bakura muttered quietly at the short duelist.   
  
"O-Ok." Yugi nodded his head up and down. With that Bakura left walking pass yami purposely bumbing his shoulder with the pharaoh's on his way out the door while his long white spikey bangs covered his dark face. Yami only watched Bakura walking away giving him a small glare back in return.  
  
Yami then walked over to Ryou's sleeping body standing right next to his hikari.  
  
"He's gone isn't he Yami?" Yugi asked softly not even bothering to take his eyes off of his sick friend.   
  
"I believe so aibou.." Yami replied back.   
  
Yugi began to gently stroke Ryou's hand softly. "Yami?"  
  
"Hai?"  
  
"..Do you know why Ryou's other dark side decided to actually stay with Ryou? I thought he didn't care about Ryou.." Yugi asked while looking at his darker half with curiosity.  
  
"I-I don't really know aibou...but what's really bothering me is that why he even said ok in the first place when Ryou asked him to.." the pharaoh sighed shaking his head slightly.  
  
"We even saw Bakura sitting down beside Ryou while he was sleeping when we first walked in this room.." Yugi added. The smaller boy took Ryou's other hand stroking it again. "Why is Ryou sick? . . . I wonder what happened to him, whatever it is I hope he feels better soon. . ." tears began to well up from the boy's violet eyes.   
  
Yami watched his light doing this and he squatted down next to the boy placing a comfortable hand on the smaller boy's shoulder. "It's going to be alright aibou..." Yami soothed out softly to his hikari.  
  
Yugi then started bawling in the pharaoh's chest.   
  
Yami gently rubbed the boy's back comforting his other half pulling him closer into his embrace. Yami's eyebrows then suddenly narrowed as his mind went back on Bakura again. //Bakura...//  
  
Yami then got up walking over to the window that was inside the small room looking outside crossing his arms over his chest.   
  
//Bakura...what's going on? Why is Ryou like this...?// . . . . .  
  
-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- 


	7. Where are you?

Ok you guys i FIANLLY update after freakin 2 whole months ¬ ¬ Sorry. I don't really have the time to get online because i'm busy and i was grounded from the internet for freakin 4 weeks! But the good news is that i'v already writen alot of chapters though.. i'm currently on chapter 12 right now and still continuing onto to 13 soon. Chapters 8-12 are like REALLY long o_O; all i need to do is upload all of them up(great.)   
  
- Yumi  
  
  
  
Chapter 8 - Surprises  
  
~A couple of hours later~  
  
Ryou moaned quietly in his sleep as his eyes started slowly fluttering open again. The snow haired teen had finally stopped sweating and his vision now was starting to focus back again.   
  
Ryou weakly glanced around with his still half way closed eyes, scanning the square-shaped white area walls that surrounded him not even recognizing what had happened to him before.  
  
He suddenly felt someone with light weight on him and he stared down noticing that his friend Yugi had fallen asleep on top of his own stomach. Ryou just smiled sweetly at the peaceful sleeping tri-colored hair boy.   
  
Ryou then slowly sat up, without even waking the short duelist that was still on top of him. "Yugi?" Ryou whispered while shaking his friend lightly.   
  
Yugi didn't reply back. Ryou tried shaking the boy alittle bit harder this time. "Yugi, wake up."  
  
Yugi finally woke up while his tiresome violet eyes were still half way closed. "What happened..?" the teenager asked while rubbing one of his eyes. "...RYOU?!" Yugi was now wide awake after seeing that his sick friend was finally awake now.  
  
"Ryou! Are you ok?! What happened?!" Yugi became all frantic all of a sudden, moving around with great velocity from one place to another beside the bed.  
  
"It's ok Yugi! Calm down...I'm fine." The white haired boy smiled weakly at his friend, trying not to laugh at the boy's sudden reaction.  
  
"Are you sure Ryou?"  
  
"Yes, I'm fine." Ryou nodded slightly.  
  
"What happened to you..?"   
  
"I-I ..don't really remember anything. ." Ryou frowned, as the thought just poped up into his confused mind.  
  
Yami had returned back into the room from getting some water for his hikari somewhere else in the building. As soon as he entered the room the former pharaoh stared surprisingly at what was right infront of him, immediately dropping the cup of water from his hand which caused it to splatter all over on the hard tile floor he quickly rushed over to the sick youth.  
  
"Ryou! Are you ok now?? When did you wake up?!" the egyptian pharaoh asked the boy while helping him sit up from his bed.  
  
"Yeah..I'm fine now. I just woke up not too long ago.." Ryou told the worried pharaoh. "But...when did you guys come here..?" How did you know that I was at the hospital??" Ryou blinked a several times in confusion.  
  
"I knew that you were sick because you didn't even come to school today..and you weren't home either. So I figured that you were probably at the hospital instead so I checked if you were here and I was right after all." Yugi said sitting down next to boy putting a comforting hand on top of his shoulder.  
  
"Oh..thank you for coming by to see me..you too yami." Ryou smiled polietly at the two Yugis'.   
  
"-But what happened to you Ryou??" yami asked suspiciously, not still satisfied with the boy's health.  
  
"I-I don't really know..I don't know why I'm feeling not so well...it just started this morning after I woke up, so I asked bakura to take me here-" Ryou paused as the sudden thought just poped up into his mind, the boy then frantically looked around the room again; his long white bangs swayed freely from side to side as he quickly moved his head left and right looking for the ex tomb-robber in the small room. . . he noticed that his darker half was nowhere to be found in sight.  
  
Yugi just gave Ryou a weird expression, not knowing what was going on with the boy.  
  
"What's wrong Ryou?? Are you ok?" Yugi grabbed onto the boy's shoulder with both of his hands looking at him straight in the eye with a concerned look on his curious face; he knew something was definitely wrong by judging the look on the teen's face.  
  
"..B-Bakura...w-where is he??"   
  
"Bakura...?" Yugi gave the white haired boy a puzzled look. "Oh..Bakura! That's right. Don't worry Ryou, he told me to tell you that he left to go home; he also told me to tell you this when you wake up because you were still sleeping..." Yugi told Ryou. The boy settled down a bit.  
  
"Oh..really?"  
  
"Yeah, I also saw him sitting next to you while you were asleep when me and yami first entered the room." Yugi added.  
  
"..Oh. Thanks for telling me Yugi."  
  
Yugi nodded his head as in he was saying 'your welcome' to the boy.  
  
//I don't remember falling asleep though...the last time I saw yami was when he was feeding me that food..what happened to me?// A small sigh escaped his lips as he ran his fingers up his white locks.  
  
Ryou suddenly tried standing up from his bed.  
  
"What are you doing Ryou? Where are you going??" Yugi asked as he quickly ran over to the boy to help him stand up straight.  
  
"I-I want to go find Bakura..." Ryou said weakly, trying to keep his own balance.  
  
Yugi's eyes widened.   
  
"What? Right now?? You can't Ryou, your sick right now and you need rest." The shorter boy informed.  
  
"I-I don't really care about myself Yugi..I just want to see Bakura right now, I want to be with him. I'm ....scared." Ryou stuttered while slightly trembling his hands, tears started to form in his chocolate eyes.  
  
"W-What are you talking about..?" Yugi asked.  
  
-"I..don't want to be all alone."-  
  
"Ryou, we're right here for you. You won't be lonely.." Yugi whispered.  
  
"P-please Yugi..I want Bakura now.."   
  
Yugi furrowed his eyebrows only staring back at his darker half giving him a discouraged look. Yami only glanced away closing his narrowed eyes. The pharaoh didn't really like enjoy listening to Ryou talking about the tomb-robber..it always reminded him that Bakura was really like the only person that Ryou truely felt comfortable with the most than anyone else without being all alone. He didn't understand why Ryou actually still loved his yami after all the terrible things that Bakura had done to his hikari before.  
  
"P-Please Yugi??" the boy begged his heart out.  
  
"Ryou, why are you scared?? Yugi said in a more serious tone.  
  
"." Ryou only stood silent not replying back to the question that the shorter boy just asked.  
  
"Yugis right Ryou.." the pharaoh finally spoke after awhile.  
  
Both Ryou and Yugi stared at the pharaoh with a blank look on their faces.  
  
"Yugi and me will always be here for you no matter what happens..we would never let anything bad happen to you. We'll always be here for you whenever you need us anytime. You can see Bakura again when your feeling better..I know you want to see him right now but now you just need to rest your body until you recover."  
  
Yami adviced softly.  
  
"...Hai." Ryou sighed nodding his head slowly.   
  
"Don't worry about it too much Ryou..I think you'll be out of here soon." The teenager said cheerfully as he patted Ryou's shoulder.  
  
"I-I hope so too Yugi.."  
  
Just then, the nurse had entered the room surprising all of the three boys staying motionless.  
  
"Hello Ryou, how are you feeling today?" the young lady smiled at the boy.  
  
"F-Fine..I guess." Ryou replyed back softy.  
  
"Oh..and where is your older twin brother Ryou??" the girl looked around the room searching for the white haired devil.  
  
"He..had to leave..."   
  
"Oh really? I just wished that he were here right now to hear this great news I'm about to tell ya'll guys." the nurse grinned happily as she told Ryou.  
  
"What good news??" the shorter Yugi asked with curiosity.   
  
Yami only crossed his arms over his chest, raising an eyebrow in confusion.  
  
"I just wanted to come by here and tell you that Ryou should be out in a couple of days starting today." the nurse smiled a generous smile feeling happy for the youth.  
  
A total shocked expression was formed on the boy's pale face but soon slowly changed into the look of extreme estatic joy that spread across the teen's present bright face.  
  
"Huh? Really?! Is that really true?? I'm going to be out soon?!" Ryou could feel himself being alittle bit too excited about all of this.  
  
"Yes, that's right." the young lady laughed while nodding her head up and down.  
  
Yugi just gave out a warm smile, also feeling happy for the teenager.  
  
----------------------------------------------------------  
  
The nurse just had left the room, leaving the remaining threesome boys back to where they currently were.  
  
Yugi then quickly ran up to Ryou with arms spread widely, ready to give the boy a huge big hug.  
  
"I'm so glad that your going to be alright!" The tri-colored hair boy exclaimed ecstatically, feeling relieved that the other wasn't in any serious situation after all.  
  
The shorter teen began crying into Ryou's chest.  
  
Ryou just rubbed the other's back gently, trying to comfort the boy to settle down.  
  
"Shh. I'm ok now Yugi." The boy whispered.  
  
Yami just slowly approached the sitting teen, congratulating the other as he patted the boy's shoulder with his hand friendly.  
  
"We're glad that your going to be alright Ryou." the pharaoh smiled.  
  
"Thank you, Yami." Ryou smiled back, still holding the sobing Yugi in his arms.  
  
" . . Um . . I bet Bakura would also be happy too if he found out about this . ." Yami said in a lower voice, hesitantly pausing in between some words seemingly revealing that the pharaoh didn't really feel comfortable to what he had just said to the boy.  
  
"Yami. . ." Ryou whispered, suddenly burying his own face into the shorter one's tall hair.  
  
The ancient spirit just out a concerned look at the white haired boy.  
  
"Ryou. .? Are you ok?" . . . //Great, I don't think i'v should of said that to him. .// The pharaoh frowned at his own stupidity actions.  
  
Ryou once again lifted his head, revealing what it seemed like a few unnoticable tears in his eyes. "Yeah. . I'm ok . ." the boy sniffled.  
  
"G-Gomen. . for talking about him again." Yami apologized in a guilty tone of his serious voice , turning his back with fisted hands.  
  
Sudden silence just surrounded between the two boys, except only from the continuous soft cryings of the pharaoh's hikari could still heard in presence.  
  
After realizing, the pharaoh then knelt down beside his light, resting a hand on the shorter one's shoulders.   
  
"Aibou. That's enough . . it's going to be alright."   
  
Yugi just cryed into his darker half's chest now, making the yami to sigh out deeply.  
  
~+.+.+.+.+.+.+.+.+.+.+.+.+.+.+.+.+.+.+.+.+.+.+.+.+.+~  
  
Bakura had already walked out of the hospital building, leading his own path to wherever he even didn't know where he was going with angry fisted hands. .  
  
It seemed like the angry boy was really pissed off at something.  
  
"That baka damn pharaoh. . who is he to tell me how my own personal relationship between me and my own hikari is like. I think I would know this perfectly better for myself than any foolish humans in this stupid damn world. . that bastard asshole deserves to die and burn in hell . . I should of killed that pharaoh for all I care, and the fact that he should already known by now that Ryou is MINE only and belongs to noone else. . . "   
  
The spirit growled furiously.  
  
". . . . Ok I didn't mean it like THAT. I'm just proving my point that my own hikari is 'mine' (not like that you freakin hentai's! [Sorry...]) and that he shouldn't be told by someone like that who dosen't even know all the stupid damn facts! I can perfunctorily treat my hikari any way I wish to. Noone else is ever aloud to touch him except only by one person, and that person would be me . . . or else they would instantly suffer and die.   
  
Why are people getting these ridiculous ideas that I'm starting to suddenly go soft on my own weak hikari?" He scoffed resistibly. "Which that would never happen anyways." 


	8. Ryou

**__**

August 18, 2003...

A couple of days had already passed by real quickly which I didn't even expect for it to happen so soon. The past couple of days were ok I guess, but the fact that I couldn't handle the 'hospital' foods that they gave me every single day for me to eat the sickening food; they tasted so terrible and awful. And then room that I was resting in smelt really...weird, but I'v already gotten used to it by now anyways so it wasn't really that bad after all. . .  
  
Yugi just visited by again yesterday in the afternoon to check and see if I was still doing perfectly fine from my illness. He brought me some good-looking rice balls that his grandpa had made back at the home in his game shop. Yugi told me that he had asked his grandfather if he could lend him some and give them to me as a small get-well gift back at the hospital .. so Sugoroku said it was ok; he also never knew that I was sick so it kinda surprised him when Yugi had told him spilling out the whole story what had happened to me the other day.  
  
They were so delicious that I almost ate the whole full box. Of coarse I couldn't help but do this because I was really starving at the fact that I couldn't really eat anything at all all day because of the 'sick' foods I had to go through. Yugi just laughed at how I was munching down hungrily on one rice ball to another that were in both of my hands without even getting a chance to take a small break from the non-stop eating. Yugi's yami just stared at me with an amusement look but also had a little small weird expression that was cast upon his usual serious face. The ancient pharaoh was also with his innocent hikari as well.  
  
It wasn't too long until Jonouchi, Honda, and Anzu also came by to see me too. They must of already known about what had happened to me because I bet Yugi told them that I wasn't feeling so well from my sickness. They stayed for a little bit but they left home no too long after awhile and I said goodbye to everyone.  
  
Oh yeah, and tomorrow was the day I finally get released and get to go back home. I was feeling a lot better now than the last time and I wasn't really weak anymore, but I still felt a little bit tired and I had a small headache that made me daze, it wasn't too big but a very small one though, but I guess it was ok . . . better than before . . . . yeah.  
  
I was so happy that I couldn't wait until I returned back at home.   
  
I just wanted to go back home and live with my normal life once again before all of this ever happened in in the first place; I really missed it. I was also feeling over-excited about seeing Bakura again...I missed him a lot too. I'v noticed that I haven't been getting to see him in the past couple of days before today. It kind of disappointed and saddened me at the thought that he didn't even come by and check how I was doing. I wonder why he didn't. I hope he's feeling alright. -Maybe he was just too busy? . . But what could HE possiblly be busy with? All he ever does is remain inside the millennium ring 24/7 but he only comes out whenever he has to do something that's important to him, and also probably maybe the reason that he wants to beat the living hell out of me for the fun of it.. yeah that too probably. Demo what I didn't really miss about him was his abusive beatings towards me that I had to go through almost every single day of my life. Dosen't he have any emotions or feelings for me..? Not ... even alittle bit..? Dosen't he understand how much the pain really hurts inside, and the pressure? And everytime I cried he just got more angrier and started hurting me a lot more for being such a weakling; he didn't like it whenever I cried out, thats why I was usually always struggling to hide my uncontrollable tears away from my yami. Every time I try to show him that I love and care for him it seems like he just always shrugs it off and purposely ignore me..and he thinks I'm just another weak hikari for being so soft against his 'evil' more powerful self. I still didn't really understand him for doing this. What was it that made him do this to his very own hikari? I know he didn't do it for no reason, He must have at least ONE purpose for doing it. I know I'v told him in the past that why he had to torture my life for no reason but I knew that I was wrong . . . . he didn't do it for no reason. There was something that made him do it. But deep down inside of my yami's own heart ... I know that he's really not pure evil. He may like torturing people, killing them, laughing that evil maniac laugh whenever seeing his victims getting suffered by the tragedy, and the fact that he's just always thirsty for blood and rare flesh. . but I knew he still had that small little imperceptible caring feeling existed inside of him at least for someone that he slightly cared about; but also barely. It may be alot difficult for other people to figure that out by now but I already knew this for myself because I'v known him the most for a very long time other than anyone else in the whole wide world.  
  
The beatings hasn't been happening for awhile now. It started right after I got attacked by those stupid big jerks. It seemed like he never did it ever again after that day. . or maybe I'm just losing my mind? Who knows, maybe I'll get hurt when I return back home again... I slightly scoffed at the thought  
  
Ano, I was still surprisingly amazed and flattered by what Bakura had done for me on that one day...it seemed like Bakura just suddenly turned into a sweet and nice person . . and this made me wonder if he had really truly changed his ways about how he treats me now. I could sometimes notice the look of resist and hesitation in his brown eyes; that looked very much similar to my own while he did all those sweet things for me with the new sudden change in his personality. When I looked into his eyes that day when he was with me . . I saw that his eyes just softened more. I couldn't really recognize the usual evil look in his narrowed eyes that he had most of the time. No, it wasn't evil looking at all...it was actually more the look of caring and concern that filled his dark orbs that almost made it actually glint by the reflecting light that filled the room brightly. It was the very first time ever I saw him do that which surprised and shocked me a bit. Did he only do it for me and no one else? . . . I just smiled to myself just thinking about it.  
  
He even stayed with me on that one lonesome dark night in the cold room.  
  
I could feel him comforting and holding me close to him in his strong embracing arms that were wrapped tightly around me while I was still frightened from everything that was suddenly happening to me. I stopped shivering from the unusual condition of the cold room and immediately calmed down to his reaction as I gently rested my head on his chest sighing softly to myself. For some odd reason ever since then, it felt really nice being around his presents; I felt more comfortable being with him. I know this may sound awkward but I felt somewhat being protected for the very first time by my own yami while I was being held by him like that. Weird for saying something like that about someone who likes torturing me eh?   
  
I remembered how gentle and soft his strokes were; it slightly made the pain go away inside of me and I felt much more comfortable and better. Just being around with him. . .it made me feel even better already. It felt really nice. It wasn't long until I could soon feel him resting his chin on top of my own head while whispering soft sentences from his mouth . . soothing them out very quietly and slowly. I just sighed and closed my eyes continuing to resume listening to his sweet lullaby. I just wanted to stay like that forever but I knew it wouldn't last too long. I just wished he acted more like this every time and showed me how he really felt towards me. . .  
  
He doesn't need to hide it from me. It seems like he fights with his own self whenever he struggles between his different actions. . I can tell by the way he stubbornly hesitates. I guess he's not really used to the new feeling he never experienced before in his entire life. . .


	9. I'm sick of this

Chapter 10 - Suicide  
  
--  
  
"Ryou, are you sure your feeling better already?" Yugi asked suspiciously, still curiously worried about the recovered teen.  
  
"Yeah. I'm feeling just fine." Ryou responded back happily just like a normal person would as he just finished changing back into his old normal clothes; he folded his hospital uniform neatly as the boy placed them in top of the bed. . . seeming like he was now suddenly perfectly in better condition after all the situation before.  
  
It had been already a couple of days after. Ryou was supposed to get released today. . the teenager was extremely estatic about finally going back home after everything that happened. Yugi was with him because he also knew about it too.   
  
"..Ok then." The shorter boy smiled an unsure expression. . .  
  
Finally after finishing getting ready, both of the teenagers walked out the room, as they together walked quietly through the empty endless-seeming narrow hallway.  
  
"Ryou, I'm glad that your back to normal again." The tri-colored hair one smiled again, happily grabbing onto his good friend's arm while playfully holding it as they continued to slowly walk together.  
  
"Me too Yugi." Ryou agreed softly while chuckling sheepishly.  
  
"I was really concerned about you, don't scare me like that again. . I really thought something bad happened to you. ." Yugi spoke in a more serious lower tone of the change in his sudden voice while he kept his head low, staring at the ground beneath him sadly.  
  
"Gomen. ." Came a soft and quiet apology of guilt from the other's mouth. "But, it seems like . . I still have a slight headache again that's making me a bit dizzy Yugi.." The boy sighed, running his fingers up his white locks as he felt like he was about to collapse again from the pain.  
  
Immediately noticing the sudden impulse, the smaller boy quickly supported his friend, catching the other in his arms just in time as Ryou literally dazed and slightly lost his own balance.  
  
"Ryou! Are you alright?" Yugi gasped helping the other to walk properly. .  
  
"yugi..I'-I'm fine.." The boy stopped at his own tracks, suddenlyscanning the small area to  search for a small chair nearby. Yugi carefully sat Ryou down on the thick wooden bench along with himself, the boy's violet eyes filled desperately with extreme concern and confusions as he stared intently at the youth's miserable face.  
  
"Ryou..I don't think you should be out yet, you need more rest here.." A sadden frown slowly spread its way across Yugi's lips knowing at the thought that his friend wasn't in any better condition after all the whole previous excitement.  
  
"Ryou..do you want me to take you home instead?" Yugi offeredto his own defeat, realizing at the fact that the boy wouldn't probably listen to him no matter what even after he had adviced the innocent teen to do what's best for his own health.  
  
"N-No..it's ok." Ryou refused nicely.  
  
"Are you sure??"  
  
"..Yeah." Ryou slowly nodded his head weakly.  
  
--  
  
Bakura slowly strode his way alone through the quiet deserted non-obstreperous park; his long white locks hanging freely and loosely from his face usually covering up most of his common features, seemingly looking like the tomb robber was assiduously still pondering distressfully about his own hikari hesitantly wondering whether if the white haired devil should visit the boy at the hospital or not. . already knowing the fact that he hadn't seen Ryou in several days after that whole incident with him staying with the boy on that same day when Yugi and his yami also visited by. He knew he at LEAST needed to check and see if the teen was doing fine in his condition, afterwards how he saw what happened to him on that other day..he never even found out if the boy ever woke up later after the unexpected collapse. . .  
  
// . . Hikari is probably still in that bed sleeping liek always.." Bakura scoffed pessimistically at the thought while lightly kicking a random pebble across the sidewalk idly with his foot.  
  
The millenium ring around his neck glinted faintly from the dimmer shining light of the sun above, mostly covered by the dark cloudy sky that just seemingly appeared above not too long ago as he continued to lazily strode along the path. .   
  
"Kuso..it looks like rain." Bakura mumbled disappointingly under his breath. Since already realizing that the tomb robber couldn't possibly return back home afterwards coming all the way roughly to where he presently was, he cursed something under his breath for the last time before finally deciding to just make his way to the hospital instead for shelter before rain would soon pour down.  
  
--  
  
It wasn't long until Bakura had finally reached the huge tall building. He took a deep breath before he led himself through the entrance door infront of him. .   
  
Once coming here before, Bakua just started heading towards his hikari's room easily remembering the boy's room number. As he reached outside of the door, he turned the door knob opening it without any hesitation, easily expecting for him to find the youth to still be in bed sleeping peacefully.  
  
His expression changed immediately, after finding that his light was nowhere to be found in sight anywhere in the room area. . .  
  
// Where the hell- // Bakura trailed off. . he curiously scanned the room until he finally noticed the boy's hospital uniform that was on top of the bed. The ex tomb robber slowly approached it and picked up the clothing.   
  
// Hikari...? // He suddenly dropped it to the ground beneath him as it landed infront of his foot. .   
  
Not even knowing what had happened to the teenager, Bakura quickly ran out the room to search him as several suspicious and frantic thoughts took over his mind. .  
  
Bakura began searching possibly everywhere as the white haired yami persistantly ran through the main hallways and up the stairs; he cursed something under his breath as the spirit of the ring couldn't find any trace of the boy anywhere.  
  
Just as the theif grew angry and finally decided that he would go back again to possibly find the boy back at home after a whole 10 minutes, something finally caught the pale boy's attention. He slowly turned his head raising an eyebrow and unexpectedly noticed that Ryou was with the tri-colored teenager chattering to one another about some sentences that Bakura couldn't hear and understand that well since he was abit far off distance away from the two boys. . afraid that his own hikari would find and notice his presence around, Bakura quickly hid himself behind the hard cool wall; the one that was closer to both of them nearby. He slightly poked his head out for better hearing. .  
  
"Yugi, where's your yami?" Ryou asked curiously.  
  
"Oh. He's staying over at the game shop with my grandpa to help him do some random stuff around the house.." Yugi responded back to the other's question. "Why..?"  
  
"Oh..it's nothing Yugi.. it's just that I'm always expected to see him with you all the time so I didn't know.." Ryou trailed off while staring at the ground beneath him.  
  
"Oh I see. Speaking of Yami . . where do you think Bakura is at right now??"   
  
Bakura slightly twitched after hearing what the suspicious shorter teenager just asked to his hikari.   
  
"I-I don't know. . I still haven't seen him lately." Ryou spoke sadly.  
  
"Does he even know that your going back home today??" Yugi asked while raising one of his eyebrow.  
  
"I don't think so.." The boy frowned deeply while he sighed deeply. "He probably wouldn't even care anyways if I did or not so why worry Yugi?"  
  
"What do you mean Ryou..?" Yugi asked with curious tone alone with his confused mind.  
  
"..No,i-it's nothing Yugi..really." Ryou lightly shook his head.  
  
"Tell me Ryou." Yugi gestured softly.  
  
With one final sigh the other spoke spoke quietly..  
  
"Haven't you noticed that he hasn't been here for the past couple of days to check and see if i was doing alright after that day he left me alone..?"   
  
The tri-colored hair one nodded slowly in agreement.   
  
"He didn't even tell me where he went of to, except he said that was going to ho back home, but I knew that I didn't really believe him... I mean what am I talking about..? Of coarse he's supposed to be like that, how stupid of me to ever think like that..." The youth whispered as he had several tears beginning to form in his eyes.  
  
Yugi just arched his neck to the side, to get a better view of the boy's face.  
  
"Everyone knows that he's stubborn, rude, and evil and he cares for noone but himself..." Ryou sniffled softly.  
  
Surprised at hearing his hikari's unexpected and unusual remark about himself, Bakura angrily clenched his fists while he gritted his teeth together. // That little- how dare he talk shit like that about me. //   
  
"I just only wish that he could think about me for once.." Ryou began sobbing quietly as he buried his own face in his hands.  
  
Feeling awful for the boy , Yugi just gave his distressed friend a very depressed expression while he gently lifted the boy into his own arms embracing him. .  
  
Ryou only cried silently into the smaller one's shoulder.  
  
"Shh..Ryou. It's going to be ok, I know it will be." Yugi whispered softly as he gently patted the white haired teen's back soothingly.  
  
"I HATE HIM!" Ryou suddenly shouted indignantly, deeply frustrated from everything that was happening with him along from the unusual illness he presently had . . . seemingly like the child couldn't possibly get rid of it no matter how much he tried his best.  
  
Ryou had no idea that Bakura was actually listening to every one of their conversations. What made his yami more pissed was that they were talking about 'him'. Not even caring about them accidently noticing him anymore, the now angry tomb robber menacingly paced up to the both sitting youths. .  
  
Yugi tilted his head from his previous attention with the crying boy, curiously staring at the person that he didn't even expect to see; his eyes soon grew wide at the sight..  
  
Ryou's sobbings immediately stopped as soon as he saw his own yami's unexpected presence infront of him.  
  
"Y-Yami..?? What-" Ryou gasped.  
  
"Hikari..we need to have alittle talk..NOW." Bakura interrupted in a calmer tone in his serious voice as he grabbed his lighter half's wrist tightly, giving it a slight jerk to emphasize his point.  
  
Ryou let out a small yelp as he got the second harder tug off from the chair he was sitting on. "P-Please Bakura, your hurting me." Ryou pleaded while trying to shake off the other's firm grip.  
  
Ignoring his hikari's annoyance, Bakura continued to harshly lead the boisterous boy throught the hallways .., leaving the confused Yugi standing behind.  
  
--  
  
Ryou tried everything to possibly talk with the theif, but this only made Bakura more frustrated.    
  
"Bakura, can we please talk instead??" Ryou begged more firmly this time while stumbling, still being literally dragged outside by his own darkness. Finally after all the extreme struggling, the two halves finally reached the outside of the tall building.   
  
"Bakura, stop this! Let go!! Where are you taking me?!" Ryou shouted furiously to get his other half's attention towards himself.  
  
Bakura finally released his own grip off the boy's now sore hand, grabbing him by the shoulders. "Uresei!! How could you talk crap about me like that to that little runt?! Huh?!?"  Bakura glared intently into the other's surprised eyes.  
  
"Bakura when did you..-?"  Ryou trailed off slightly, changing the subject.  
  
"Answer me!!" Bakura interrupted.  
  
"Why are you getting mad at me for?!' Ryou yelled back at the top of his lungs. "And besides..why would you care?"  
  
Actually amazed by his hikari's unusual back-talk and attitude for the first time, Bakura only stood speechless at the scene.  
  
"The only reason why I said all those stuff about you to him was because it was all the truth and you know already know about it too! And you made me leave Yugi back there even before I got the change to tell him I had to go!" Ryou furiously told the ancient spirit.  
  
"Watashi..watashi wanted to-" Bakura spoke in a softer tone to his own defeat, afterwards hearing his own hikari's correct statement about himself and realizing that he couldn't deny and resist the fact. .  
  
"And don't make excuses Bakura, because you know that I'm right." Ryou was now the one to interrupt his darkness's studdering. " You didn't even bother to visit me, you didn't care!" Ryou continued.  
  
"I was thinking about stopping by today to see you but you weren't even there okay?! Why won't you believe me??"  Bakura cried.  
  
"Whatever..I thought that you've finally changed your ways, demo now I know that I was stupid to ever think that.." Ryou whispered while he kept his head low, a small trail of tear slowly rolled down his covered face.  
  
"..Hikari..I'm-" Bakura was about to finish his sentence but stopped at the sudden thought of remembering his own promise to himself.  
  
// Ok I can't start to lose myself to him now..I can actually feel myself growing more softer again. I can't allow anyone else to know about all this..And I can't let them see it, not even my own hikari either. . .I'm sorry Ryou. // His fists were trembling in place.  
  
"Well Hikari..that's just too bad if you got all your hopes up so soon..you know I would NEVER change." Bakura responded in a fake disappointment tone along with the sudden change of his attitude towards his light, revealing that once evil self of himself again in appearance; he gave Ryou a sadistic smirk.  
  
"I hate you..." Ryou spoke indignantly while looking at his yami straight dead in the eyes, not recognizing and unaware about his own attitude.  
  
"You know Ryou..that's just perfectly fine. I don't really give a crap even if you did or not because i also hate you as much as you do." Bakura forced a small smirk to appear on his unsure face while he crossed his own arms over his bare chest confidently.  
  
" Oh is that so? " The boy scoffed softly.  
  
" Yes, it is! "  
  
" Why do you have to be so rude?? "  
  
" Because you annoy the hell out of me! "  
  
"But why?!" Ryou repeated with more curiosity.  
  
"I just told you Hikari. . . " Bakura annoying rolled his eyes.  
  
"That wasn't a really good excuse for why your always cold-hearted. Don't blame me for how the way you act towards everyone." Ryou also crossed his arms.  
  
"Then don't ask me these stupid senseless questions!"  
  
Bakura silently congradulated himself for his own successful plan; he smirked confidently at the thought of it, but it seemed that he was also having a difficult time struggling between the different opposings of his own reactions.  
  
"Bakura, your the one who asked me in the first place." Ryou accused quickly.  
  
". . And your point?"   
  
". . . Bakura, What's wrong with you ??" Ryou asked in a more quiet voice.  
  
"Nevermind." Bakura sighed while turning his back on the boy. "Hikari, shut up. . . just shut up okay. .?"   
  
"Yami, just tell me what's wrong with you." The slightly shorter child gestured softly while gently grasping onto his darker half's hand.  
  
"I SAID SHUT UP!" Bakura roared furiously, angrily but accidently punching his own shocked hikari quickly in the face. This made Ryou fall to the ground as he instantly held his own bruised face in his hands.  
  
After just realizing his own unexpected actions, the tomb robber suddenly felt crestfallen after what he had done for the first time while he continued to stare surprisingly at the boy beneath him.  
  
Unaware of what just happened to him, Ryou sobbed silently while he tried getting back up onto his feet from the ground.  
  
Bakura's focused eyes carefully studied and followed the other's each and every slow movements; he really wanted to apologize to the teen..but it looked like something else irritably kept him from doing it. . .  
  
Without even saying anything, Ryou finally stood up as he quickly turned his back from his yami. He began running towards the alley infront of him. .  
  
"Ryou, wai-! Don't!" Bakura only watched the boy slowly dissappearing at further distance as he continued to run off with great speed.  
  
// Damn. // Bakura cursed lowly at himself.  
  
// Oh well. . I'll bet he'll return back home later anyways. // With one final soft sigh, Bakura turned on his heels, beginning to slowly strode his way back home as he kept his own hands in the pockets of his jeans. .  
  
--  
  
Ryou  
  
I just wanted to get away from him as far as I possibly could..I didn't feel like seeing, talking, or listening to him right now at all. . . I kept on running and running to where I even didn't care of know where I was confusingly leading my ownself to. . Tears were also welling up in my eyes as it instantly blured my own vision, making the objects and surroundings infront of my eyes to be seen unclearly. I couldn't even keep the equanimity of my own mind right now. I was too stressed and angry at my own yami for everything that he had done to me. I had really been expecting to see Bakura actually show his feelings towards me more at the end. . .   
  
I noticed that the area that surrounded me while I continued to run looked like a place where I'v never been to before. It looked alittle scary and dark, not to mention that the sunset was already setting in place up in the cloudy sky. . .  
  
I finally stopped running to catch my own heavy rapid breaths. Also probably from all the unstoppable cryings that I choked on. I just couldn't control my own tears and bawling; they persistantly kept on streaming down my swelled face. It just hurt so much inside. My own heart felt like it just broke into a million pieces and I couldn't manage to breath that well either. I clutched onto my own chest tightly with both of my hands, my clenched fists causing the center of my shirt to wrinkle while I slowly fell to my own knees. I soon wrapped my own shivering arms around my shoulders.  
  
My sobbings suddenly soon stopped. . as I just continued to gaze down at the ground beneath down intently while I had the sudden change of expression that couldn't be clearly identified that was placed upon my face. .  
  
Judging by the look I had on my face now, I was thinking about...just everything. All the pain and sorrow I suffered through. Even in the past..it seemed like it all came back to me again. My thoughts now focused on how I was usually never satisfied with my own happiness in my current life. I'v always felt really lonely. I had couple of friends, but I already knew that my problems didn't really concern them even if I tried talking to them about it..  
  
That's why I always kept my millennium ring with me at all times, because I knew that Bakura was the only person that I was actually closer to than anyone else, he was the only one that I had left. Demo, I also knew that he didn't love me back for the way I did for him. . . to tell you the whole truth, I'v just always wanted a comforting and loving person who loved and cared for me; just like a bigger brother or some other things related to that topic. I was really the only child back then when my mother was still alive. . I did had a older sister but she also died so I didn't really have a sibling that could stay around me anymore. And my father was always gone. . just leaving me to always stay home by myself and not even caring less if something bad possibly happened to me by the time.   
  
I slowly took out a small knife from the back of my pocket. It was my yami's; the one that he always used for his own self-mutilation and torturing at times. He must of forgotten all about it if it was still here with me right now. I slowly lifted the object, pointing the sharp razor point directly close towards my own chest. . .if I died . . . I wouldn't have to suffer about all of this anymore. It would be better if I didn't even exist at all actually...right?  It just would be even better for me If I was already in heaven; not having to worry and fear the terrible things that are happening to me while I was still alive back on earth. I didn't really care anymore. . . .  
  
One last final tear trailed down my face as I quietly whispered a soft small sentence allowing it to escape from my lips ..  
  
"Bakura. . . gomen na sai. ." It wasn't too long until I slowly closed my eyes. . finally jabbing the sharp object against my own bare chest, forcefully and deeply to make it go through until it was literally all the way inside. I screamed loudly at the unimaginable and horrible pain that I wasn't even aware of. What have I done to myself...? I wasn't ready to die. Truthfully. Frantically, I kept on persistantly tried everything to stop the bleeding with my bloody hands over my chest, but it was no use. . it just wouldn't stop. It just hurted so much.   
  
My breathing was becoming more heavier by the minute and I felt so weak fighting against it. I now laid motionless on the ground, instinctively rolled up like into a small ball with the imperceptible shivering I was also going through at the same time. I was getting more colder and my own arms weren't good enough to give me more warmth.  
  
I didn't want anyone to know about what just happened to me.. I wanted to be the only person that knew..I didn't want Bakura seeing me like this, because I didn't want him to feel unhappy and sorry for me being such a weak person. . . .  
  
"Bakura . . I'm so sorry. Please forgive me."  
  
--  
  
Bakura  
  
I was  boringly flipping through the channels of what Ryou told me what it was called.. oh yeah . . . the ' T.V ' along with my own expression of dullness that was casted upon my seemingly unassuming dead face while I repeatedly pressed the random buttons on this remote device that your supposed to use it for. .   
  
I already knew how to use it afterwards watching my hikari do it a couple of times before. I wasn't still used to these newly modern electronics that they had presently in time. I was exhuastedly laying on the sofa on top of my own stomach, my left arm hanging down loosely from the edge of the couch while lazily using the other hand for the remote as my head rested peacefully on the soft cussion pillow. Finally after realizing that there wasn't a really good purpose for watching this piece of shit.. I turned it off, just when my concerned thoughts gradually focused and drifted off to something other else. Not satisfied with my own current uncomfortable position, I kept shifting around until I was actually laying on my own back now. Both of my arms folded restingly under my head while I laid cross-legged wondering worridly as I stared up at the ceiling above me.  
  
It had already been an hour since I got back home from where I left him, and still sign of my hikari in sight at all. He should of been back home by now, despite he was obviously still furious with me.   
  
I lazily turned my head to the side and glanced back at the clock. It read 8:00 p.m. Great. Just great. . It was already getting late but it only seemed like 5:00 to me though. I began fiddling around with me thumbs impatiently while humming a small tune that I had heard and memorized before on this thing called the radio. The truth was that I was bored as hell. I have to admit that it wasn't the same without my hikari around the house. I felt somewhat really empty without him somehow. . . I didn't know why though. Was it because I missed him?  
  
I took my own Occult deck out from the pocket of my jeans. I began shuffling through them with my hands . . until I finally reached . . 'The change of heart' card. What the hell? How did it even get here in my supernatural card deck?? It didn't really belong with the other cards that I had in here. I must of replaced it by accident. How stupid of me. I was about to shrug and put it away until I suddenly stopped what I was doing. I remembered how it was both me and Ryou's favorite one before out of all the other ones. But I didn't really care about it anymore, it didn't really mean anything to me. I quickly threw it away across the table sitting beside me while I lightly scoffed.  
  
Placing my own hand on the millennium ring, I began lightly tracing against the unusual features of the circle-shaped object with my fingers idly. . I looked outside the window infront of me with my half-closed eyes. I noticed that the clouds were darker than before; it was almost pitch black and I knew it was going to pour down soon. Ryou was still probably outside and he would definitely get sick again if he got caught into it. He had already been through alot from his previous illness and I didn't really want him to get more sick than he already presently was. . .  
  
Along with my own eerie sensation, I really hoped nothing bad happened to him at the fact that it was taking him longer than I thought . . I kinda feel bad for how I treated him back there . . I didn't really mean to hurt his feelings that bad and I actually wanted to apologize afterwards. With a quiet sigh and finally making up my own stubborn mind, I decided to just go out and look for him myself.  
  
I lazily stood up from the couch that I was currently laying on and started walking towards the door and opened it as I walked outside. How am I supposed to know where the exact place he's at right now? I don't even know why I'm even bothering to do this in the first place anyways, but I just couldn't leave him out there. Noticing that I felt a small drop of water that just dropped down on top of my nose from above, it began to slightly sprinkle abit. Damn it! Now I'm going to get all wet! You just have to put me through all this trouble for me to just find your ass don't you?? I frowned deeply as I murmured some curses and random sentences that purposely escaped from my lips under my breath.   
  
One thing that I knew for sure was that my hikari wasn't back at the hospital. .  
  
I began to trace back all of my every steps that I'v taken. Demo, still no sign of him anywhere..this was really beginning to make me frustrated.  
  
"Ryou, Where are you..?" . . . // // //  
  
-- 


	10. I never knew

Hey you guys im back ;) and i'v decided to continue writing the fic! Thanks to all those who reviewed and supported me to still write the story. I love all ya'll so much3  just in case...NO FLAMES. Don't worry i'm not gonna go off and kill Ryou just like that. Anyways. . onto to the story. Enjoy. ^_^  
  
-Yumi  
  
  
  
Chapter 11.   
  
Just when Bakura was about to give up and go home after struggling searching for the boy. . he saw a familiar form laying down motionless on the ground. Immediately recognizing the body he quickly rushed over and carefully turned the boy over onto his back for better observation, to soon realize that it was Ryou.  This made him to gasp surprisingly at the sight.  
  
"Ryou! RYOU!!!" Bakura gently picked the boy up and carefully cradled him in his wrapped arms while he screamed frantically to wake the boy up. He searched the boy's body to look for any important injurys that might of caused the boy to possibly pass out from. He soon noticed a severe bleeding wound in his chest, also along with a blood-stained knife placed right into his hikari's own hand. Bakura's eyes went impossibly wide as he slowly grabbed it  from the hand.   
  
"You didn't...." Bakura whimpered uncontrollably as he cradled the body closer to him. "Ryou, please wake up!!" He tried again while lightly shaking the teen. Nothing. Bakura quickly placed his head close to the boy's chest, to hear any possible heartbeats.   
  
Luckily, the boy was still alive. Bakura quickly scooped him up in his arms as he started sprinting towards the hospital again. He needed desperate help even if he hated admitting it, much to his own self that he's never 'asked' someone to help him at least or so..  
  
On his way bakura spoted a small phone booth nearby. He decided to call Yugi's place to check and see if the pharaoh was there or not. ..  
  
"Hello?" He heard a chirpy voice on the other line.  
  
"Yugi, get yami! It's an emergency!!" Bakura cried over the phone, making the boy cringe.  
  
"OOwwwww..." The tri-colored hair boy moaned while holding his ear in pain.  
  
"ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO WHAT I'M SAYING?!?"   
  
"B-Bakura..?? Is that you..? Um..h-hold on." The boy studdered.  
  
"..."  
  
"Hello?" Came a slightly deeper voice than the previous one before.  
  
"Yami, I ..I need you to come to the hospital right away.."  
  
"..Bakura? What do you want now?" Yami narrowed his eyebrows at hearing the boy's voice.  
  
"It's..Ryou.." Bakura trailed off as he was about to loose that control he had for temporairly at the thought of the boy again. Silence instantly only filled in between their conversations..  
  
"..Bakura? Hello?!" Yami repeated. "What happened?!?"  
  
"..Just come to the hospital, alone. Then i'll tell you..." He quckly hung up the phone even before the pharaoh could say anything.  
  
"Bakura! Matte-"  
  
His attention immediately focused back to the laying boy with his own shaky breath as he slowly walked over to pick him back up in  his arms. He did this carefully so he wouldn't accidently hurt the injured boy..  
  
"Ryou..."  
  
  
  
Bakura  
  
I rushed through the entrance doors with Ryou still carried in my arms like a little baby as I quickly ran up to one of the persons in charge. I told her that my hikari's chest was bleeding persistantly and that he needed an emergency help badly in need. Noticing the severely injured wound, she immediately called in some docters on the way..it wasn't too long until they arrived. They carefully took Ryou from my arms as they put him on the trailer. Now he had the oxygen breather over his mouth while the docters continued to quickly get him to the emergency and operation room.  
  
I wanted to go and make sure he was ok but they wouldn't even allow me go along with them and told me to just stay over and wait at the other room . That's when yami arrived and noticed that a couple of guys were restraining me from still going in there. .he then looked at me oddly...I could then tell what was exactly on his mind. .  
  
  
  
The white-haired teen and the pharaoh sat silently by the waiting room, waiting and expecting for one the docters to come out and tell them how the boy was progressing along. .  
  
Unpatiently, Yami continued to stand stiffly while crossing his arms over his bare chest trying to control himself from going in there  ... while Bakura had calmed down a bit from earlier and had already managed to sit himself down on one of the chairs that were in the hallways, still desperately worried about the boy. His hands and whole body shivered terribly from the whole situation.  
  
Hesitantly, Yami walked slowly towards him, trying not to somehow accidently make the other boy to become more nervous than he already currently was. .  
  
As he finally reached the boy the pharaoh sat down beside him and placed a comfortable hand on top of the other's shoulder. .  
  
"Bakura...tell me what happened to him...onegai." came the usual serious but soft gesture of his voice.  
  
Bakura didn't respond back , instead he only clenched his fists tighter onto his jeans, causing the material of the pants to form more wrinkles into its own place. Yami saw this and glanced back at the boy continuing to stare at the other's covered appearence. He then sighed softly realizing afterwards.  
  
"...I understand." Yami took his grip off the boy's shoulder and stood back up, ready to return back to his own previous position and place.   
  
"..I-I don't really know... exactly what happened to him.." Bakura spoke lightly.  
  
Yami stopped at his own tracks after hearing the other's familiar voice again.  
  
"..When I finally found him...I-I-"   
  
Bakura could instantly feel his own voice breaking again.  
  
Yami walked back to the teen and sat back down next to him.  
  
"You.." Yami helped.  
  
"..I noticed that his chest was bleeding horribly. He had a knife with him. . . and that blade was also covered in his own blood.." He whispered softly while a new small tear trailed down his delicate pale skin.  
  
Yami's eyes instantly widened.  
  
"Then I knew that it was obvious afterwards.....he was trying to ..kill himself."   
  
"Ryou.." The quiet whisper escaped from the pharaoh's open lips.   
  
"...Why. Why did he do this Bakura. Tell me now!" He lightly shook the other's shoulders, easily expected to get some answers from the other's mouth.  
  
"I don't know..it's not likely for him ever acting like this. But, we did get into another argument before he ran off. I didn't really know where he went. . ."  
  
The tri-colored hair boy narrowed his eyebrows angrily after already predicting what  he could of possibly done to his hikari.   
  
"....You hit him. Didn't you?.."  
  
Again, Bakura stood silent. Abit surprised by the other's correction and right statement. "I told you that it was an accident.."  
  
" ..You.....love him.  Don't you.. " Yami finally said to the boy with confidence, a slight unsure smile revealed on his lips.  
  
Bakura didn't asnwer back. He only continued to gaze down at the floor beneath him again, alittle startled and unaware of the other's question.  
  
"Why can't you just admit it to others ? Are you that scared?"  
  
"Iie.."  Bakura lightly shook his head.  
  
"Then why don't you tell him how you feel..?"   
  
"..He wouldn't believe me." Bakura replied doubtfully.  
  
"Yes he would. If you told him the truth." Yami told the boy calmly.  
  
"  
  
"I....don't want him to die." Bakura admitted hesitantly.  
  
Just when Yami was about to reply back, one of the docters had already come out from the operation room. Immediately noticing this , Bakura and Yami quickly got up and ran up to the young man.  
  
"Well..how is he docter??" The pharaoh asked curiously. Bakura just listened while he swallowed nervously.  
  
"Well..he does have a serious injury in his chest. But luckily the knife didn't damage any part of his insides. We managed to finally stop the bleeding  awhile ago and we took care of everything by bandaging his whole chest up, so he should be doing fine later." The man smiled.  
  
Bakura sighed softly, glad that the boy wasn't badly hurt.  
  
"But..may I ask you some questions concerning to the boy's own condition?" the man asked the two boys.  
  
"W-What about his condition..?" The white-haired boy asked curiously.  
  
The docter sighed deeply. "Um..has he had some particular physical problems before with his health?"  
  
"Well...he hasn't been feeling very well these days, we don't know why though. He stayed over at the hospital for a couple days until he finally got out today." Yami replied slowly. "He's been having bad headaches recently and he's collapsed a couple of times without any warnings. Do you know what's wrong with him?"  
  
"..While we were checking on him for the reason...we...-"  
  
"What?! Tell me damn it!!" Bakura yelled while quickly grabbing the surprised man by the collars of his white shirt.  
  
"Bakura! stop this now!" Yami screamed, trying to get the other's attention.  
  
"Not until he tells me what the hell is wrong with Ryou! " The boy tightened his grip on the man. "If you don't tell me what's wrong with him  i'll kill you!!" Bakura cried furiously.  
  
Yami quickly ran up to him and grabbed his arm. "Bakura let him go now!" the pharaoh repeated himself.  
  
"H-he...has...some sort of cancer." The man finally spoke shakily, terrified of the boy. "We..just found this out."  
  
Bakura's expression immediately faded as he felt himself shaking violently at the unexpected news, making him more difficult to keep his own balance. Yami noticed this by just staring at the boy beside him.  
  
"I'm sorry to tell you this, i don't really know what to say. . we don't truely know how he got it but . . i also don't know how long he'll be able to live through with it, if we don't quickly do something about it soon. ."  
  
Hearing the man say this to both of them. Bakura slowly released his grip off the man's wrinkled shirt. Total shockness and despair filled his wide chocolate eyes and he remained motionless, seeming like the boy was just staring off into the open atmosphere without not even noticing and remembering the place that just surrounded him.. he just... stared off. He couldn't bare and believe the fact of what he was just hearing infront of him..  
  
The pharaoh also shook lightly with his wide violet eyes, not even comparable to the other boy. He also too had no idea that Ryou was-. What surprised  him the most was that none of them, or anyone else, hadn't known or had the slightest clue all along on what was really going on.  
  
Bakura instantly fell to his knees while clutching onto his head. "Ryou...no.." he shakily breathed out exhaustedly. He began whimpering softly.  
  
The man only slowly walked away with his head low, leaving the two boys alone as he felt somewhat guilty about himself.  
  
Yami walked over to the teen and knelt down beside, grabbing the boy's shoulders.  
  
"You had no idea..?!? You didn't even have any clue or suspicious feelings on what was wrong with him in the beginning?! Did you even care about him Bakura?! Well did you?!?" Yami cried frantically.  
  
"Tell me damn you!!" The pharaoh felt his own voice breaking as he almost lost his own control over the other.  
  
The pharaoh grabbed his shoulders again more firmly and his fingernails tightened into the boy's skin as he looked into the other's eyes with his own glare, demanding for an quick answer. This made the boy to slightly tilt his head up from his gaze on the ground he had for seemingly forever ever since they both  arrived at the hospital, the pharaoh saw more tears in the boy's dark brown eyes, along with the small quiet whimpers that he also heard clearly from the other's mouth. The pharaoh knew then he was just making things more worse for the boy. It literally shocked him to realize that he would never even see the day that Bakura would 'cry' over someone for once, so his last harsh expression that he took out towards on him had immediately worn off after seeing the other's miserable face. Yami felt himself loosening up again at the unbelievable sight right infront of his own eyes..   
  
Bakura choked on the words that he was struggling to get out, to yami it seemed like he couldn't barely understand what he was trying to say...  
  
"...R-Ryou...he had no idea that he-" Bakura couldn't manage to control himself anymore as he failed miserably to finish his last sentence. Everything new to him was too much for him to handle. That emotion again. That feeling. It just..hurt so much inside. And the pain; he felt that terrible pain which he now experienced for the very first time in the past over 3,000 yrs that the whole purpose for it finally made him to realize..    
  
"And everytime I saw him...he would just always........smile." He whispered softly before loosing that control again that he once had for temporarily, soon bursting out with more sobs and tears persistantly flowed from his eyes while he kept them shut tightly , allowing his head to fall foward and causing them to rapidly land down below on top of his clenched fists, gasping breathlessly.  
  
"Bakura...." Yami spoke softly while resting one of his hands on top of the boy's shoulder.  
  
Without thinking about it, Yami slowly pulled Bakura into an embrace as the white-haired one began to   
  
bawl more violently into the formal pharaoh's chest.  Again, he didn't know what made him to go ahead and hug his worst evil rival, but He didn't know what had possessed him to do it and now that he had either, what he was going to do. .but he didn't really care; he was too worried about him..and he felt deeply sorry.  
  
They both just stayed like that for it seemed forever.. 


	11. Your apology

Was this really happening..? The question itself persistantly repeated inside my empty head over and over again for it seemed like eternity and my hands trembled uncontrollably while i continued to intently stare down at them below me.   
  
Was he really going to die like this?? I slowly shook my head in attempt, resisting the horrible true fact.   
  
A couple of hours had already passed by and it wasn't too long until the docter arrived and told me I could finally see how he was doing afterwards. Yami told me he would just wait outside and he gestured me to just go ahead and see Ryou. I slowly nodded in slience.  
  
After a couple of minutes I entered the room, noticing that he was still asleep in bed from his own slumber.  
  
I slowly approached him with careful caution, afraid that i would by any chance accidently wake him up. I reached beside the bed he was laying on. I stared down and carefully studied and examined his features with my own eyes that revealed somewhat both concern and sorrow at the same exact time..  
  
His appearance didn't look so well and he looked awfully terrible; his face was more paler than the usual tone color of his already natural white skin and he had several small dark circles that had already formed beneath his heavy eye sockets.  
  
His mouth was slightly opened and small moans and whimpers escaped his small lips i heard only for temporarily.  
  
I slowly reached out and started caressing his small delicate face to comfort and calm him down. He finally stopped making cry-like noises as i repeatedly continued to tenderly brush his soft cheek with my own thumb. I then allowed one of my hands to slowly slide upward to easily cup and hold his face in my palm, while several big strands of his soft white hair fell past loosely over the top of my hand and rested lightly against my knuckles.  
  
" Ryou... "  
  
I leaned more foward until our faces finally meet closely by only a few inches away...  
  
"..Onegai...don't die.." I slowly closed my eyes as i was aware of instantly feeling small tears beginning to roll down my cheek again as they landed down below on my hikari's covers forming dark orbs. "...Please...don't leave me...I don't want to be lonely again...please..." the last word on my sentence came out seemingly and unexpectedly like a high whine compared from the others as I lost control and I immediately heard my own voice breaking up again at the very end. I then lightly rested my own forehead against his while i still held his cold face in both of my trembling warm hands, finally admitting to him...  
  
"...Aishiteru." I whispered softly. The tears i continued to uncontrollably shed dripped down my chin as they randomly landed down on his below..  
  
The small opening space between us that waited finally closed. I gently kissed him as our lips meet one another. His lips were so cold compared to mine, but i immediately got used to it. I felt that same feeling growing more gradually inside of me again; that new emotion that i hadn't experienced in a very long time since my unforgotton past. I couldn't really remember it all that vividly, but i still knew some images of my childhood. I remembered how my father was abusive towards me and he had beaten me almost every single day of my life... and i hated him for that. And my mother...  
  
I couldn't remember her all that well, but I knew she died. I was lonely ever since everyone left; I had noone else to look up to or love anymore; I was the only one left...alive that is. I just only wanted someone, anyone beside me, knowing that they're there to comfort and care. I remembered... I just wanted to run far away from my own home... to possibly who knows where, from all the pain and sorrow I roughly went through. I then grew up becoming more corrupted, hate and anger gradually grew inside me as i couldn't handle and bear all the pain i was going through while i got older, until i finally completely changed afterwards. I became cold hearted towards everything.   
  
Then I remembered when i first met Ryou.  
  
I didn't know who/what this weakling was, but i knew i had to accept the true fact and realize that he was really my own hikari when i first saw him with my own eyes. It even surprised me that he told me he loved me ever since then and i didn't understand why he did even after all the bad things i did to him. Then later things started to gradually change, I started developing some sort of feelings toward him over the time, even before during the time when i still beat him badly, but i couldn't just admit it to him because I wasn't really sure about myself, even if i did i could feel and imagine my own body screaming at myself for doing such a stupid thing. Then as i spent more time with him at the hospital i felt myself growing more softer every day. I started caring more about him, not just about his own health and also not only the main reason that i didn't want his body to get damaged in any way, but because i now realized that i really did love him after all this entire time. Was he the one to really teach me how to finally love again..? And now...I just found out that he was going to possibly really die soon, even before I ever got the chance to tell him everything about all of this before. Why did everything have to end this way..? I finally found that someone to be with and love again ...and I didn't want that feeling I had once lost before to disappear and go away, then I would just be left all alone from exactly where I used to be, where it all started in the beginning and I didn't want that to all come back again.  
  
Ryou...I'm sorry for everything I had done....please forgive me....stay with me.  
  
I finally broke the kiss between us for it seemed like eternity.  
  
I slowly pulled away from his face. I slowly opened my eyes, looking at him again. My eyes suddenly grew wider, shocked to now notice that he had been awake this whole entire time. He had tears glistening in his brown eyes making his orbs to shake wildly, he then finally blinked allowing them to freely trail down his cheeks.  
  
"yami...." he spoke weakly.  
  
()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()  
  
Where was I..? I weakly opened my eyes to exhaustedly take small glances around the small room. I then noticed that Bakura was right in front of my face staring at me. Did he just kiss me?? The last time i remembered was when i was running off to somewhere...and then i stabbed myself with Bakura's knife. I didn't know what happened to me after that, but i think i was too weak to fight against it. I thought i was already dead for sure but what the heck was going on here..? Did Bakura find me and take me here to this place?  
  
"Yami...?" I spoke softly to him.  
  
He blinked. Then he slowly reached his hand out towards me. I lightly flinched and cringed at his touch, scared of what he would possibly do to me, but instead i soon realized that he just only wanted to caress my face. I immediately relaxed closing my eyes again as he did it really gently and I knew then for sure he wasn't really planning to hurt me at all. I knew his eyes were telling me that he wanted to really say something, but he hadn't even spoken yet, but only continued to softly touch me. To my own surprise, he instantly buried his face in my shoulder and started crying his heart out. It startled me at first, but something else told me that it seemed that he just only wanted to be held tightly by somebody...  
  
I didn't know what he really wanted from me so I began softly stroking his white hair with my fingers, while I held and pulled his head more closer with my other free hand. I lightly rubbed and patted his back to calm him down; similar to what he did for me once before. I gently rocked him until he felt more comfortable. I bent my head lower to his, planting several small kisses on top of his head. I wanted to tell him that i was sorry...just sorry for everything what had happened today. I knew what i did was wrong, but i just couldn't control myself and i wanted to apologize to him for doing such a foolish thing. Truthfully, I didn't really want to leave him either in the beginning. . . . .because i loved him so much with all my heart. . .  
  
I captured his chin with both my thumb and forefinger, slowly lifting it up from the previous gaze he had down on my shoulder for awhile. I expressed my apology to him by kissing him back. I heard him whimper as I continued to gently nip on his lower lip, silently begging him to gain better entrance into his mouth. Knowing this he allowed me to do so. I moaned softly into the sweet kiss as well as i also heard him moan with pleasure. I caressed the back of his thin neck; my own fingers lightly tracing back up and down on against the small bumps formed from the spinal cord in his upper neck. He softly sighed in response. He started to kiss me more passionately, now without any hesitation.  
  
He finally broke the kiss after awhile, needing to catch his breath again. I softly whined in protest, looking at him in the eyes again. I wanted more of it; I wanted him to show me how much he really loved me. Why did he suddenly stop? I whimpered more, pulling on his front shirt towards me. I slightly lifted my head off the pillow i was laying on, quietly whispering in his ear.   
  
"Kiss me...onegai. " I desperately begged to him.  
  
He stared at me. he then closed his eyes bending down to my ear.  
  
"..Hikari...I'm so sorry for everything...please forgive me." I heard him whisper quietly.   
  
I didn't know what to say to him, of coarse not in that way of expressing that i didn't want to forgive him after everything he had done to me, but i was just only speechless at his apology. I did really forgive him as long as he really meant it. Perhaps the next small sentence that came out of his mouth shocked me even more than the last.  
  
"I love you."   
  
My eyes went wide and i just stared off.  
  
I looked at him again and i had tears starting to glisten in my eyes, making my orbs to shake wildly. I then finally blinked, allowing them to freely trail down my cheeks. I just heard everything what he had said. Was this really true about him actually loving me? It was a little hard to believe, but something about the tragic expression that was placed upon his miserable face told me he was really telling the truth. It shocked me to see that he had tears in his eyes from earlier and i remained silent the whole time.  
  
He wiped all my tears away from my face, kissing them softly. He then hugged me by carefully wrapping his arms around my shoulders, trying his best not to accidentally hurt my wounded injuries more. At first I tensed, but i calmed down. I soon felt the softness of his snowy hair against the skin on my cheek and i instantly smelled his sweet essence in the air. It smelt nice. I buried my face more in his hair as I hugged him back with my own arms now wrapped around his shoulders, returning the embrace. My grip on his shirt tightened more , desperately not wanting him to ever leave me. I just wanted to stay like this forever, but I knew it all would soon wear off. I violently but softly sobbed into his shoulder, pulling him closer to me. Then I soon realized that we both were crying in each other's arms. . .  
  
Gomen na sai...  
  
. . . Aishiteru.

__

...I remembered that day; the day he first confessed to me. I had no idea until He finally told me about everything. It…just seemed not that too long ago, as if it felt like only a couple of days ago. I finally forgave him after everything He had done. . .After that day, it felt like everything just completely changed. . .


	12. Why do you still hesitate?

Ahh I finally updated again ^_^ Sorry it took so long to get the next couple of chapters up. Enjoy.

-Yumi.

__

Chapter 13: Conversations

**__**

December 10, 2003...

__

I decided to go back home again a couple of days after the whole 'incident'. I was getting tired of staying here for awhile so I had already told bakura that i just wanted to go back home. He told me i should rest more often for my own health, but it only appeared that I was only bugging him more. I didn't want to stay here anymore. It always kept reminding me that i was so weak...so..miserable. I hated it. I saw the sorrow on yami's face on the day i finally got released. He was dead silent as soon as he saw me come out. Why did he stare at me like that? Of coarse, he pitied me and felt deeply sorry, like what everyone else would probably do if they ever found out. I didn't want to tell anyone...it would be too much for them to even handle it, and i didn't want them to feel more bad for me than they already did. I'm so pathetic.

A couple of months had already passed by so quickly...

to where it was now winter in December. I always loved the season; it was my favorite...even the weather. Bakura on the other hand practically hated it since he wasn't used to the cold weather and such for himself. He and I have gotten a lot more closer and it was nice getting to know him more personally in the meantime as well. He treats me now more better than before, but the way he acts towards others hasn't changed one bit...I guess he only did it for me. God, I love him so much... I just want him to know that. I'll always love him no matter what happens, and that's a promise that'll I'll always keep between just both of us. I don't care what happens, the only thing that matters to me is if I only make him happy for once. Even though he's the darkness, my darkness, he is a truly beautiful person deep inside other than that. I want him to know someday.. that he's made me into a stronger person at the end. Even though I had to go through his beatings in the past, but the past is the past. And I just want to thank him. Without him I would just remain as a weak person even now, but I learned a lot of things in life. 

Now than ever before, it was sometimes hard for me to even breathe. After going through with the frequent attacks I would occasionally get that I wasn't even expecting at particular odd times a month later right after I got out of the hospital, I knew then for myself that my heart condition was beginning to get more worse, but of coarse it was my own decision that I just wanted to go back home instead. My doctor had told me that he had found out that it was some sort of a heart disease, and they had given me a respirator and pills just in case to ease the pain whenever it would occur at times..

The small radio sitting on top of my desk played a soft tune, the same song I'v heard once before. It was in English so i didn't really quite know the language fluently that well. I released my grip on the pencil I was writing with, letting it drop on top of the piece of paper I was jogging down on. 

My own sense then instantly snapped back to reality from my own lost daze as i soon felt a warm hand gently rest on top of my shoulder. Surprised, I quickly slammed the book I was writing down on.

"..What are you doing?" Bakura asked curiously, standing right next to the hikari.

Ryou slowly turned his head to the side, staring up at his own yami. He only gave back a small warm smile in return.

"..Nothing. Really." Ryou shook his head as he then grabbed the small book that had been sitting on top of the desk beside him.

"Well, it didn't really look anything like nothing." The thief sat down on the bed beside the teen. "You know...you should be resting instead of doing all this for no purpose." he spoke with a small amount of concern in his own voice.

"It's okay bakura. I really am. " 

Bakura only gave back a small serious glare at the ivory haired teen. "No, it's not okay. Your still weak." he lightly replied back in his calm and low voice.

"Really yami, I'm fine. Remember the promise you gave to me today?" Ryou looked at bakura; his innocent brown eyes expressing a small amount of sadness and pleading.

Knowing that he couldn't continue fussing over the poor boy any longer bakura softly sighed. Yet, he didn't want to argue over him knowing that he was just going to make things look more worse for the other since he knew that his hikari had already gone through a lot. This made Bakura's frown deepen more at the thought of remembering the past situation again.

"Alright. But we're coming back home not too late.." bakura stated.

Ryou's bright smile returned to his lips, now happy and satisfied. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

It had suddenly turned cold outside, but not too where it wasn't too windy. The winter white and grey clouds filled the whole sky as if making it look like it was soon going to allow a small flake to fall down onto the unusual empty and non busy streets and sidewalks, like it would usually be on any regular day. Not disturbing, but only silently calm and relaxing. It was a rare and beautiful quiet afternoon like this one, especially on this very special day. Bakura looked outside the window inside the house, sitting down on top of Ryou's bed while ryou had now finally finished changing into his winter outfit.

He was wearing a light colored coat that seemed a little too big for his own size, matched with the scarf made from a soft material he wore around his thin neck. To top it off he grabbed a pair of gloves to bring along just in case. Just as he finally finished, he turned his attention back to bakura, noticing that the thief was being too silent through this whole entire time…

"Are you ready yet?" Ryou questioned expectedly. Bakura didn't answer back to his question and only continued to stare outside with his now more softened eyes.

Ryou raised an eyebrow in confusion as he slowly waved a hand across back and forth to get his attention. "Bakura?"

Suddenly startled, bakura slightly jumped as he quickly focused back to the boy. "Oh.. Sorry. Are you already ready??" he questioned queerly.

"Are you going out like that? You know its really cold outside." Ryou pointed out, his eyes slowly observing down bakura's stripped shirt and plain jeans he usually always wore most of the time.

"Of coarse not baka. What makes you think that?" bakura replied. He jumped off the bed and went over to grab his long black trench coat off the rack. He threw it over his shoulders and tugged roughly onto the collar at the top.

Ryou slightly arched his eyebrow. "Are you sure your only going to wear that? It seems not warm enough.." 

"Got any better suggestions then?" bakura stated.

Ryou scratched his head. "Well.. I can always let you borrow my other clothes that I have." Ryou offered slowly.

"I don't want it… " Bakura cut him off at the end, but his voice still calm and soft.

"Fine. Don't blame when you catch a cold later because I'm not going to feel sorry for you. " Ryou told him more strictly while inserting each of his hands into the gloves.

"Hey, I won't get sick! Unlike someone who always does." Bakura complained childishly while slightly narrowing his eyebrows in frustration. His smirk then returned to his lips at the end of that last sarcastic statement.

"That's not even funny bakura. Now, let's hurry before it gets any colder. " Ryou sighed. Ryou's soft expression returned back to his face at the thought he just remembered..

"Um bakura…can I ask you about some-" Ryou trailed off, but was instantly interrupted by bakura.

"Let's go.." Bakura left the room not even bothering to look back at him.

//What's wrong with him..?// Ryou thought suspiciously to himself. Bakura had been acting really awkward ever since then when he had returned back home. He didn't know what the reason made him though, but it was a little clear to himself that he was still struggling and going through what had happened back at the hospital, and ryou didn't feel really comfortable of the way he was acting. His yami still had that cocky attitude of his inside of him, but ryou knew he was still going through that process of changing at the same time. As long as he was being more nicer it didn't really matter to him. He couldn't believe that bakura was pure darkness, because he knew that bakura still had a little light inside of him so Ryou made the decision that he was going to find it sooner or later and make it grow…

"Wait bakura!" Ryou called out while running after him.

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"Bakura would you slow down a bit. Your walking too fast!" Ryou panted breathlessly while trying to catch up with the thief. 

"Actually I'm walking at normal pace while you're the one who's being slow here." Bakura snickered.

Ryou finally got the chance to catch up with bakura as he now walked along the side of him. He clutched onto his chest and struggled to catch his breath again.

"Why are you in such a hurry?" 

"I'm not. In the meantime I thought I was the one who was giving you the chance to catch up." Bakura's grin widened, acting as innocent as he could. 

"Uh huh sure. Whatever bakura." Ryou rolled his eyes in annoyance.

"Honestly! I was." Bakura complained more seriously.

"Then why didn't you say anything back when I called your name back there?" Ryou accused lightly.

"Um..well…"

"Thought so." 

"Hey! You didn't even let me finish my own sentence." The darker boy tightly crossed his arms over his bare chest for better warmth as a cold wind blew by, tussling his white hair.

Noticing this reaction, Ryou hid a small smile. "See I told you that you would be cold. Don't deny it, because I see the way you have your arms crossed." He quietly laughed.

"No I'm not! I'm doing this because you know I always cross my arms this way." Bakura made an excuse.

Ryou tried not to laugh out loud by the other's reactions every time, it was kind of fun to tease bakura, but he knew that he would be more offended to the point where it will probably make him furious at the end if he continued any longer.

"Um..Bakura" Ryou spoke in a more serious tone.

"What?"

"..Um..about your past…I'v heard you once talk about it before. Do you still remember about it?" Ryou asked hesitantly.

Bakura softly sighed. "Not really. I don't remember everything, but luckily I already know the important things that occurred and happened to me during that time. Instead my memory is a bit fuzzy on the people I had relationships with.." Ryou noticed that his voice grew more soft and light.

"Oh…well..is it okay for you to share with me about what happened to you in the past sometime?"

"Why would you want to know about it anyways? It's not like your going to change what happened in the past." Bakura responded more coldly as his mind drifted off to his own tragic past.

"Well… I know that, but it would be nice for me… to get to know you more personally. And…maybe I'll get to understand you more. " Ryou stared down began twiddling with his thumbs together while a small shade of pink appeared on his cheeks.

"Don't you already know what kind of person I am by now? You've known me as I'm cold hearted, insane, physicotic, and that I'm always thirsty for both blood pain." Bakura pointed out.

Unexpected, ryou was now slightly disgusted by that last sentence. He cringed at the sudden gruesome thought.

"Well…I know that you still have that small light inside of you somewhere deep inside. You even told me yourself about it during the time when you were only a small child back then."

Bakura chuckled a small laugh. "Me? The darkness? That's the complete opposite. I have no light inside of me…remember? Of coarse, I'm still gradually changing, but it doesn't literally mean that I'm gonna change into a whole different person that your expecting me to be." bakura replied back simply.

"If you truly believe that you don't have any good left inside of you, then how did you show me how you felt about me on that other day when you confessed everything to me?" Ryou questioned.

"True ryou. I'v told you all my emotions and feelings, told you some parts about my past, why I'm the person I am today and right now, but it's not like I'm going to do the exact same for others."

Hearing this, ryou instantly stopped at his own tracks along the sidewalk he was walking on. Noticing the other's sudden reaction, the darker boy also stopped. He looked over past his shoulder to stare at him with a somewhat confused expression that was upon his face.

"Why…me then? Why did you only tell me about all this..?" Ryou spoke more softly.

Bakura's eyes suddenly grew more soft afterwards hearing the boy ask this. "Well…because…you're my hikari…and I thought you would be the only person that could understand me the most than anyone else since you've known me for awhile now.…" bakura trailed off, his own voice dying at the end. "Ah who cares! It doesn't really matter anymore. Just forget about it. Okay?" He said hastily before walking off.

Surprised, ryou only stood dead silent without even moving a single muscle, while bakura continued to walk ahead of him. A small shade of pink had formed on both of his cheeks in total embarrassment. It soon appeared that he then finally gave back a small smile in return.

"Wait bakura! Where are you going?! Wait!!" Ryou shouted out hastily. He quickly ran after his annoyed yami while clumsily stumbling on each and every step that he took.

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That's it for this chapter for now u_u. Please review!


	13. My gift to you

Chapter 14 - A special gift

It was supposed to be a whole day off with only him and bakura, just the only two of them. You can't actually really say that it was supposed to be like a 'date', as others would probably think or take it the wrong way. No, it wasn't a date at all. More of a sibling related thing. Instead, bakura had already promised him that they would spend some quality time with each other for the very first time ever. Of coarse, ryou had to go through another begging to satisfy bakura, but it was obvious later that he didn't even need to since bakura had already agreed on it without any problems. Ryou always wanted to show bakura around during the modern present time since he wasn't really familiar with some other things, so ryou had planned on teaching him some fun entertainments first.

First was off to the electronic store, where ryou predicted that it would eventually catch bakura's fascination. He had thought it would be nice to share all the cool gadgets with bakura since he liked mostly all of them. Surprisingly, he was correct.

"What's this..?" bakura asked curiously in interest awe. The white haired darker boy held the object above his head. "Arn't these supposed to be called headbands?" the thief raised an eyebrow

Ryou couldn't help but only allow a small laugh. "No. That's a headphone." he corrected.

"I knew that baka." bakura murmured annoyingly. Ryou only sighed and rolled his eyes in frustration.

"How do you wear these?" he spoke more seriously.

"You put it over your head, like this." ryou took the time to help bakura with everything as much as possible without trying to go through the frustration at the same exact time. Although this was bakura's very first experience after all. After going through a seemingly rough struggling to get it the proper way he finally managed to..

"There. Now you just push this right here to hear music." Ryou smiled while pushing a random red button below. Bakura scratched his head in suspicion.

"I don't even hear anything.."

"You have to wait."

"Oh wait, I hear it. Hey, this is pretty cool ryou...so this is what music sounds like." ryou then noticed that his expression had grown more soft again.

"See. I knew that you would like it. Just push the other buttons to change the music and songs. I'm going to go look at some video games and movies in the meantime. Don't go anywhere without even telling me. Okay?"

Hoping that bakura wouldn't possibly do anything stupid, ryou left the thief behind.

He thinks that I can't even take care of my own self. What makes him think that...?bakura thought lowly to himself while pushing another random button to change the music. The next one, however, didn't really catch any of his interest at all..

"Boring..." he spoke outloud in a monotone. He began repeatedly pushing every other button to change the station in boredom entertainment.

Ryou, on the other hand, was searching for some interesting home movies that he could probably buy for both him and bakura to watch when they go back home at the end of the day. At first none of them didn't seem to catch any of his interest . He continued looking until he spotted the one he was looking for, picking it up from the shelf.

I just hope that bakura will like this..he thought to himself hopefully. "Or maybe I'll just get two instead just in case.." he smiled brightly before grabbing another. His expression grew more serious at remembering the thought of his yami. "I wonder what he's up to.." ryou told himself worriedly.

"Work you stupid. Damn. Piece of crap..!" A sudden yell from a certain tomb robber filled the whole store, where some people were expected to be found staring weirdly at him in confusion, but bakura didn't really care about the humans around him.

"If you wish not to be tortured by one of my favorite torturing methods you WILL obey me!"

Unexpectedly, bakura had already ruined the whole new music system after it hadn't even been about half an hour since ryou had left him all alone. He growled furiously in frustration by banging his fist violently on top of the buttons, causing some of them to malfunction and break.

"Oh shit." he cursed more calmly. "That wasn't smart.." He soon noticed that a grumpy security guard then walked up towards him.

"Um excuse me kid, but what are you doing?" the taller man demanded a quick answer by tapping his foot impatiently.

"Um...well...you see...I can explain.." bakura forced out a fake nervous laugh. If this guy dosen't wish to die then he better get the hell out of my face. Oh wait...I already promised to ryou that I would stop trying to kill people from now on...damn it!

"Excuse me sir. Are you there?"

"It's not like I did it on purpose...honestly!" bakura waved his hands in front of him while sweat dropping nervously. I can feel my patience wearing thinner....

"Yes you did. I saw you kid. You literally broke it and now I'm going to have to ask you for in charge of paying that thing." the officer informed while pulling out a small notepad out from his pockets.

"WHAT?!" bakura blurted out hastily. The security guard only eyed him raising an eyebrow. Bakura had enough of this once and for all.

"Heh. What if I don't then? It's not like your going to make me...so what are you going to do about it mortal?" his voice suddenly changed back to his old attitude.

"Well, then I'm going to have to do this.." the officer smirked while a several more guards appeared out of nowhere behind him with what it looked like a pair of handcuffs in both of their hands. Bakura's eyes instantly widened from surprise afterwards realizing. He quickly pushed and ran past all of them, causing some of them to get knocked over.

"Ahhh! Ryou! Help me!"

"Get him!!" one of them yelled from under another.

Ryou stood in front of the cashier's table. He again stared down at both of the dvds that he had chosen out for both him and bakura. He smiled at the thought. One of these could be a special Christmas gift for bakura. I just hope that he doesn't find out that I bought it for him until I tell him about it first." ryou sighed happily.

"I just need to pay for these and then I have to go look for hi-" his thoughts were immediately cut off by the sudden scream of a familiar voice yelling out his own name. Ryou slowly turned his head to the side and saw the frantic thief running towards him with great speed.

"There you are baka! I was looking everywhere for you!" he panted breathlessly.

Ryou's eyes widened. "Bakur..?"

Without even letting him to get the chance of finishing his question, bakura quickly grabbed onto his hand and began pulling me out.

Ryou had no idea on what was going on. "Hey! Wha..? Bakura, what are you doing?!" he screamed.

"I Can't explain right now, I'll tell you later. Now just shut up and come with me. NOW!" he continued dragging the poor boy out of the store.

"Now...wait a minute..! I still need to pay for-"

"Ok good, I knew that you would understand!" bakura interrupted him yet again.

"Demo-"

"LET'S GO FEED THE PIGEONS!" bakura shouted more loudly, trying to ignore what ryou was trying to get out from his mouth.

"There aren't no any pigeons in here!" ryou pointed out.

"I meant out in the park baka. We can play with them, torture them, shove corn seeds up their small asses..." bakura constantly went off acting as if he was excited about all of this.

"Bakura, what has suddenly gotten into you?" ryou asked worriedly. "Why are you in such a hurry?"

"Why must you keep on asking?! Now just hurry up!" Ryou only sighed out loud as they both finally got out of the small building.

"Okay...where are the pigeons...?" ryou asked bluntly, looking around the streets.

"Um..I lied." bakura replied back lowly. Ryou only glared back at him.

"Bakura!! I didn't even get to pay for the things that I wanted to buy. It's all your fault that everyone probably thinks I'm a thief now..!" ryou screamed. "What happened?!"

Bakura felt more bad after noticing the furious look on the boy's face. "I..um..accidently broke that thing I was listening to back there..." he confessed hesitantly.

Ryou's eyes widened in fear. "You...WHAT?!?"

"I'm sorry! I didn't really mean to!" He apologized arrogantly.

Ryou slightly shook his head in disappointment. "Bakura...I think it would be best if we both just went somewhere else instead.."

"Fine with me."

_Electronic stores…they…weren't definitely the right place for him. I was sure we were about to get literally killed just for the main reason that He 'accidentally' broke some hopeless CD player that I showed me. Luckily, we both never got our own asses caught for the consequence. I didn't know why for myself, but just remembering the thought on what happened on that day always made me laugh out loud.._

Ryou sighed disappointingly before taking a small bit out of his food.

"I still can't believe you did that.."

"Uresei.." bakura growled angrily , taking a huge chomp out of a big red piece from his rare meat in unmannered form. A red juice trailed down from his mouth, making ryou to hope that it wasn't what he thought it looked like and slightly cringed at the sight. He looked back down at his own meal, gently poking the food with his fork nervously in playful manner. Bakura soon noticed his sudden change.

"Aren't you hungry..?" he quirked an eyebrow, feeling not comfortable of how ryou was now acting.

"No. It's not that. It's just..." ryou paused as if he was trying to get something out from his mouth. "It's really nothing.."

"Are you sure you okay? You've been acting really weird ever since we came here." bakura suddenly grew more concerned.

"Huh? Of coarse. Why do you think that?" ryou smiled back at the thief mysteriously; this made bakura slightly shudder.

"You know, your kind of scaring me." He continued chewing his food in a more slower pace. Ryou only laughed out loud at his reply.

"You are! Not only that, but your starting to laugh for no reason now."

Just when ryou didn't get the chance to answer back, the young waitress returned back to their table holding a yellow check in her hands.

"So did ya'll enjoy the meal?" she smiled.

"Yes. Arigato." ryou smiled back politely.

She nodded her head in return. Her attention then focused back to the boy that looked very much similar sitting in front of him, and then back to ryou in interested awe.

"I'v been always wanting to ask you ever since i first saw ya'll. Are you two related?" she asked curiously.

"Yes. No." bakura and ryou replied back with different answers at the same exact time. Ryou only gave him an odd stare of confusion.

"Oh. Then are you two twins then?"

"Yes. Well..." they both answered again. Ryou now glared back at him, and turned his attention back to the waitress. "Um..actually we're not related at-"

"Yes, we are." bakura interrupted rudely while wrapping his arm tightly around the other's neck, literally almost choking him to death. "We're brothers."

Ryou's eyes widened in surprise. "No, we're no-" he coughed.

"Right ryou?" bakura grabbed him by the head and ruffled his now messed up white hair in a playful manner.

"Wait a minut-!"

The young girl only laughed out loud hysterically. "You two are so sweet to each other. And cute too." she added at the end while winking mysteriously as her interested eyes appeared to seemingly be now focused on bakura.

A small blush of embarrasment formed on his cheeks while bakura twitched one of his eyes as she left them.

"I think she likes you, bakura." ryou giggled softly.

"Shut up! Um..look..let's just get out of here....now. Are you ready or not??"

Ryou slowly glanced around with his tiresome eyes, making sure that he hadn't forgotten about anything. As he was turning his head from side to side something fascinating then suddenly caught his brown eyes from outside the fogged glass window. Surprised, he had finally noticed that it had already begun to slowly flake down at steady pace. It was snowing. His attention focused back to his yami, who was waiting impatiently for him to hurry up. Of coarse, bakura didn't even notice this yet and ryou's mind had already planned for himself that he wanted to surprise bakura with the beautiful sight, the fact that ryou knew that he had never seen what snow looked like ever before. His lips curved upward into a mysterious smile in excitement.

"What are you smiling about..?" bakura cocked his head to the side in disturbance.

"I..want to show you something.." he told the thief softly. "Do you mind coming with me outside? And you can't peak." He added.

"Outside? Why do you want to go there? I'm freezing my ass off in here already!" bakura complained.

"Please bakura. Just for a sec. I promise..." ryou begged; his eyes expressing strong emotion.

The older boy pouted, but loosened up. "Fine! But hurry up."

"Ryou's smile returned back to his lips. "Thanks.."

"Is this supposed to be some kind of joke..? Cause if it is, it dosen't seem that funny.." bakura questioned suspiciously while his eyes were covered by ryou's both hands in front of his face. "Or is this supposed to be some sort of a surprise?" he asked again as he had no idea where he was walking to.

"We're almost there bakura. Just keep on walking until I tell you to stop. And remember, no peaking at all."

"What is it that you want to show me..?" the darker boy began to get more impatient. "You know...I think we should go home now. You've been acting weird all day and I don't think none of this has been good for you."

Ryou continued leading bakura to the very top of the small hill in front of their path and made sure that bakura didn't trip or miss anything in particular along the way, then he knew that he would ruin everything. After a seemingly long rough struggle to get to their destination they finally reached the very top. The wind in the cool air gently blew by, slightly tussling both his and his yami's long white hair. There was nothing surrounding the empty area, but except only from the large blue and clear ocean that fittingly matched nicely with the white and grey clouds above in the sky. The view was just perfect and breathtaking if anyone ever got the chance to see it. Luckily, both him and bakura were the only ones to view it for the first time.

"We're here." ryou whispered softly. With that he finally took his hands off of the other's face, allowing the thief to see his own sight again in front of him. Bakura's eyes instantly widened, blinking in both confusion, but fascination as well. The slightly taller boy stood silent for a moment, not knowing whether to speak or not for himself in this kind of situation right now. The flakes from the snow falling above him landed and blended along well in color that matched perfectly with his already white hair. Noticing his sudden change of personality, ryou smiled looked back at him.

"Well…what do you think?"

"It's…beautiful…" bakura whispered softly, continuing to now stare up at the falling sky. "…What is it?"

"It's snow." ryou told him simply.

"Snow…?" bakura questioned oddly. Suddenly, his eyes widened again.

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A young Egyptian boy that looked about only 8 years old sat at the very top of the steep roof of his own house, staring and silently admiring the big stars that sparkled and twinkled brightly in the dark sky high above him, however, he wasn't alone. Another small girl that looked slightly younger than her own beloved big brother was sitting right beside next to him, also admiring the sky in mild fascination. She softly sighed happily, resting her head against her brother's comfortable shoulder.

"It's beautiful…isn't it?" her soft voice was just barely above a whisper..

"Yeah." the other that appeared to have shoulder length and choppy white hair replied back, not bothering to take his staring eyes off the dark blue night.

"wouldn't it be really pretty if we both ever got the chance to see what snow really looked like..? I'v always wanted to see it.." she slightly frowned in mild depression, closing her eyes halfway.

"It's too bad that we will never get the chance to.." the white haired boy sighed deeply in disappointment. "It will never in this kind of place that I know of.." he added bluntly before now standing up on both of his legs. He then slightly spread his arms out apart, while slowly closing his dark brown eyes and sticking his nose up into the sky. The cool wind blowing in the thin air tickled his nose.

"I wish I could just fly…so I could go anywhere, and any place that I wish to go to…" he spoke softly. The sorrowful boy then opened his brown eyes again, looking back down at the other. He revealed a small sad smile. "Don't you..?"

"Hai." she nodded gently in agreement.

"C'mon. Try it, it's actually fun! Even though its just all pretending." he suddenly shouted out, his cheerful voice now filled with happiness.

"Okay." she grinned back.

The two young related siblings continued to laugh in both excitement and fun humor, to the to point where it all soon lead them to become extremely exhausted from all the too much fun at the end. They decided to take a short rest by sitting back down again on the roof.

"Can I ask you something..?

"What?" he replied back, still panting breathlessly.

"When we're both free…someday…could you sometime show me what it looks like?"

The boy's last expression on his face gradually faded to where now he was more serious, but he smiled back at the end.

"Of coarse."

She gasped in both excitement and surprise. "Really?!"

The boy nodded his head again. "I don't know when it will be…but someday…"

"Do you promise??" she held out her pinky out, waiting for the other's response.

"I promise."

They both twined their fingers together in agreement. She looked back into his eyes with a now more happy smile on her face.

"Arigato...oniisan.."

Bakura suddenly gasped, tightly clutching onto his head with one of his hands which literally almost made him to lose his own balance. He softly groaned while clenching his teeth together. Ryou immediately noticed this sudden reaction.

"Bakura..? Bakura! Are you okay?" ryou supported him by grabbing onto his shoulders.

The darker boy looked back at him, a slight look of surprise in his eyes. Ryou only grew more worried at this.

"What happened?"

"I'm..not sure. Are you ready to leave yet?" bakura suddenly asked out hastily.

"S-Sure." Ryou only watched him slowly leave…a tint of sadness in his brown eyes as the wind blew more harder messing up his white hair.

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He turned his back and started walking away. I stared at him blankly as he slowly walked off silently. I then opened my mouth to say something, but I reluntantly backed down again as I soon suddenly felt a sharp-like striking pain go through my heart, and it felt so horrible. I quickly clenched onto my chest with the support I hoped that obviously didn't exactly help much. I knew then for sure that it was another attack I was going through. This time the attack was more worse than it ever had been before, and it was more difficult for me to breathe again...

But I didn't let him see me like this as I quickly turned my back on him. Luckily, he didn't hear me struggling and he continued walking off as if nothing had ever happened. I quickly took the respirator out the back pocket of my jeans and inhaled into it. After a couple of minutes the pain was starting to go away gradually and I felt a little better afterwards.

"Hey Ryou, you coming?" He then called out, turning his head around.

"Be right there bakura." I smiled back at him.


	14. Reunited

**Chapter 15 - Christmas Eve**  
  
It was getting colder, and the white and grey clouds filled the whole big sky once again. Snow was flaking down again the early next morning. It was Christmas Eve. Ryou yawned loudly, lazily walking himself over to the window. As soon as he saw that it was snowing again, his frown was soon replaced by a bright smile returned back to his lips in ecstatic joy.  
  
"Hey Bakura, it's snowing again!" Ryou yelled at the top of his lungs, hoping to get the yami's reply back upstairs in his own room, however, he didn't respond back. Ryou's frown of disappointment then returned back to his lips at remembering at the thought.  
  
'I hope he's feeling better from yesterday. Why can't he just answer me back?' He sighed softly.   
  
His thoughts were then interrupted by the loud ringing from the telephone sitting on the table beside him. He looked over back at the phone oddly before slowly picking it up.  
  
"Moshi moshi?"   
  
"Ryou! It's so nice to hear from you again. Do you remember my voice?" A bright and cheerful voice spoke at the other end.   
  
"Um, I dont think so." Ryou scratched his head in confusion. Although, the voice itself sounded also somewhat very familiar to him, but he couldn't remember who it belonged it. His mind then snapped, finally realizing at the end. It was Malik.  
  
"Mariku! Yes, it's been very long ever since Battle City. Are you still in Egypt with your family? Are you doing alright?" Ryou spoke excitedly.  
  
"Hai, I'm doing fine." Malik laughed out loud. "I just wanted to call and tell you that I'm coming back to Japan this afternoon for Christmas Eve. We're having dinner at Isis's apartment, so I was wondering if you wanted to come by and see us later."  
  
"Thats great! Sure, I'll come by later and see you two." Ryou nodded.  
  
"Okay, I'll talk to you later then."   
  
"Alright, bye."  
  
"Ja ne."  
  
Ryou hung up the phone, sighing softly. Malik was one of his good friends, and it surprised him the fact he hadn't seen the egyptian boy for a while ever since the pharaoh saved him from yami malik in the Battle City finals. Deep down, he knew that Malik's real personality was kind and gentle, almost like himself. Ryou still felt sorry for him for the way he was misunderstood in the past, but everything seemed to be perfectly fine now.  
  
"Hoi." a low blunt voice suddenly interrupted his thoughts.  
  
Ryou slightly jumped and quickly spinned his head around. It belonged to Bakura, who was walking down the stair case with his own arms crossed over his chest. Ryou only stared at him blankly.  
  
"Oh, Bakura..." Ryou spoke slowly. His muscles immediately loosened up again afterwards seeing it was only his yami. Ryou smiled at him.  
  
"Who was that?" Bakura asked curiously, raising an eyebrow.  
  
"It was Malik. He told me he's visiting by for Christmas Eve." Ryou giggled happily while closing his eyes. Instantly, it was obvious he soon noticed that Bakura nearly lost his own balance, causing him to almost literally trip and clumsily fall down the couple of stairs remaining at the bottom floor. Ryou's grin gradually disappeared and was instead replaced by the small sweatdrop forming behind his head, puzzled by what was going on.  
  
"W-WHAT?!?" Bakura choked violently.   
  
"...I said Malik is visiting by. Why?" Ryou gently brushed his cheek with a finger curiously.  
  
"Why the hell is that damn bastard coming here for?!" Bakura clenched his fists tightly, teeth gritting furiously.   
  
"Oh yeah, and I already told him that we're coming over to Isis's apartment later to stay for dinner." Ryou added happily, ignoring the yami's loud outbursts.  
  
"WHAT?! There's no way in hell your going to make me go there!" Bakura crossed his arms over his chest, pouting childishly. It was the truth that he did really hate Malik. He always had. Even though his alliance with the boy never meant anything to him back in the past, instead, Bakura still had a grudge against him from what happened.  
  
"C'mon Bakura, it'll be fun. It's Christmas. Where's your spirit?" Ryou frowned sadly.  
  
"...Aren't I one already?" he finally asked sarcastically after a couple seconds of silence.  
  
"I didn't mean it like that." Ryou sighed, resting his hands on his hips.   
  
"No. I'm not going, and that's final." Bakura's brows narrowed once more, now expressing more seriousness.  
  
"Bakura, I already told them so you have to go with me tonight." Ryou pleaded.  
  
"Try and make me." the cold smirk Ryou knew very well had returned back to Bakura's lips.  
  
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"...I still can't believe you made me come down here, and I'm freezing my ass off out here in this damn cold!" Bakura mumbled annoyingly. Of coarse, Ryou had actually managed to drag him all the way from the struggle they had to roughly go through. Bakura had harshly demanded Ryou to trust him for where he was leading them off to, but instead had accidentally taken the complete wrong path to Isis's apartment by looking at the directions Ryou showed him. Ever since then, they both had been walking around the whole city for an hour just to get back to the right place where they had first left off. Surprisingly, niether of them got sick.  
  
"Stop complaining. Your the one who got us lost in the first place." Ryou accused disappointingly. "Besides, we're only standing outside the door. Thank goodness I found the way to get back again." he forced out a relief sigh.  
  
"Hey, if I never came along then you probably wouldn't have gotten lost in the first place since I wouldn't even BE here to annoy the hell out of you." Bakura pointed out.  
  
"We wouldn't have to in the beginning If you just _listened_ in the first place when I was telling you the directions myself. And that shortcut we took wasn't actually the right place I was expecting." Ryou stated confidently.  
  
"Hmm...I thought it was a shortcut..." Bakura pondered momentairly.  
  
"Yeah, you _thought_." Ryou corrected bluntly.  
  
It wasn't too long until the door finally opened, revealing the young egyptian blonde. "Ryou! I'm glad you got to make it." Malik smiled brightly. Noticing that Ryou wasn't alone, his lavendar eyes then slowly fixed upon the boy standing right beside him who looked almost exactly alike. Malik almost jumped back in shock.  
  
"Bakura? Is...that...you..?" the tanned boy asked hesitantly.  
  
"Yes, it's me baka. Why, did you think I was actually dead?" Bakura demanded dangerously, but calmly through void and emotionless sharp eyes that glared daggers back.  
  
"Oh no, I just wasn't expecting...to see you...with Ryou. Um, did I miss alot of things on what happened ever since I left? Are ya'll two having a relationship now or something?" Malik scratched his head.  
  
"No!" both of them yelled at the same time. The two white haired boys then looked at each other, but immediately turned back around instantly caused from the blush forming on both of their burning cheeks.  
  
"Hey, I was just asking. " Malik chuckled sheepishly. Bakura glared back at him.   
  
"Hey, do you two wanna come inside now. It's pretty cold outside." Malik shivered.  
  
"Oh yeah, sure." Ryou also shivered. Bakura remained the same.  
  
As soon as Ryou came through the entrance, the very first sight that captured his fascinated eyes were the colorful bright lights that had been neatly decorated on the walls and the big Christmas tree in front of him. A calm music played softly in the background from the stereo. Wrapped presents were shown sitting under the tree, and alot of different types of ornaments hung from the branches by skinny strings. However, Bakura, completely opposite from him, stared somewhat with a disgusted expression.  
  
"Isis is in the kitchen right now cooking, so it's going to take awhile." Malik grumbled impatiently.  
  
"Oh, it's alright. Oh malik?"  
  
"Yah?"  
  
"Have you talked to Yuugi yet ever since you came?" Ryou asked curiously.  
  
"Oh yeah, I did. Him and everyone was at my arrival at the airport this afternoon."  
  
"It's really nice to see you again..." Ryou smiled softly.  
  
"Ah...it's been pretty long, hasn't it?" Malik laughed nervously while rubbing the back of his head.  
  
_December 23, 2004_  
  
_We all ate delicious dinner together later that evening that Isis had cooked for all of us. The random conversations we were discussing about was pretty hilarious that actually made me laugh and have fun for once, mostly that all came from between the small sibling arguments that Malik had between him and his sister. I noticed that Bakura who was in the middle of it wasn't talking very much through the whole thing and he didn't even bother laughing for once. It looked as if he was still glaring at Malik with the look of 'ready to kill' the whole entire time. I didn't know what the problem was that went on between him and Bakura, or was I the only person out of everyone to notice this? Bakura even barely touched his food with his silverware. I guess it makes sense that he doesn't really need to eat since...well...he's really a spirit.   
  
I wasn't expecting it when it suddenly became harder for me to breathe again during when I was eating my meal. I didn't even have my medicine or the respirator with me at the time since I left it back at home, so without any of it made it only worse, but surprisingly I managed to control it since this one wasn't as big and serious like the usual ones I go through most of the time. It wasn't long enough until Bakura then noticed the struggle on my face including the grip I clenched onto my chest, and his last expression upon Malik was replaced by the curious look on his face as he stared at me suspiciously. Luckily, no one else saw this so I was relieved.  
  
I was asked to be politely excused from the table and I quickly ran towards the restroom nearby. Malik and Isis only stared at my back with a puzzled look. Bakura blinked and remained silent.   
  
In the restroom I was struggling more against the pain since it turned out to be a lot worse than I had thought before back at the table. I opened my mouth as wide as possible for me to get enough oxygen into my lungs. I only hoped that it would soon end. I lifted my head from the sink and looked into the mirror in front of me. I saw my own reflection staring back for me to realize that I had so much pain and sorrow reflected back hurtfully at my own image. I didn't understand why it was more easier for me to look this way instead of just crying.   
  
I slowly returned back where everyone else was now sitting silently at my reappearance back at the table. Malik asked me where I went and I told him that I needed to use the restroom for emergency. Of coarse, he was taking it the different way. I looked back at Bakura; who was still staring at me suspiciously. I only smiled back, hoping to myself that it would give him that gesture expressing that I was fine. We all continued to eat more quietly at the end...  
_  
"Hey, Ryou." Malik whispered softly into Ryou's ear.  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"Not to be rude or anything...but why does Bakura keep giving me that look?" the blonde boy asked slowly. "He's starting to freak me out."  
  
"Oh...it's probably that he's been grumpy all day for no reason. Don't worry about him." Ryou laughed nervously.  
  
%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%  
  
"Hey! Watch out Bakura!" Malik quickly tried to warn him, but he was too late since the poor boy was totally off guard. A big snowball hit him right in the face, splattering everywhere. Malik gasped in total shock from the accident, but the expression on his face immediately changed into humerous and violent laughter at the end.  
  
Malik had dragged and forced Ryou outside to play in the snow since it was also his first expierence with snow. It was obvious that Bakura somehow got forced into it as well, but he never wanted to be part of the whole excitement. He was already pissed ever since then, and now that Malik hit him with the snowball literally made his anger rise and explode that he had controlled only for temporairly.  
  
"Hey, sorry about that Bakura. I didn't really mean to." Malik had now calmed down from all the hard laughter. Ryou only giggled along with him since he had to agree with him it was quite hilarious seeing that Bakura actually looked funny covered in a big pile of snow.  
  
Bakura gritted his teeth together and growled furiously. "You'll pay for that."  
  
"Aw c'mon Bakura. Have some fun at least." Malik grinned, approaching the angry boy and lightly punching his shoulder playfully.  
  
"The only time when I'll be having _fun_ is when I'll finally get that chance to rip your throat out and make you suffer through hell before a painful death." Bakura spoke lowly and dangerously.  
  
Malik sighed and shook his head disappointingly. "You still haven't changed at all Bakura ever since I met you..." he laughed. "Don't you ever get tired of always being angry?"  
  
"No." Bakura replied back simply, tugging roughly on the scarf he wore around his neck uncomfortably that Ryou had let him borrowed.  
  
"Why can't you be happy for atleast once?" Malik frowned.  
  
"Because being happy is only for stupid weaklings." Bakura was getting more annoyed from all the questions being asked.  
  
Malik sighed softly once more, before glancing back at his lighter twin who was too busy finishing off the big snowman he had made. Ryou stood back a couple of steps to take a better view and giggled, proud of his own hard work. He sighed before staring up at the dark falling night. Stars sparkled brightly high above the threesome boys. Ryou smiled and closed his eyes, allowing the flakes to land down on his pale face.  
  
"He's so innocent. Don't you think?" Malik spoke more gently. "He's always been ever since I first met him in Battle City." Not getting back the quick and obvious answer the blonde teen was expecting to get from Bakura, he raised his eyebrows.  
  
Malik turned back to Bakura, who was currently staring at the white haired boy with a small amount of amusement and interest. Malik then grinned suspiciously after noticing the calm expression on Bakura's now more softened face.  
  
"Your starting to develop some sort of feelings for him now, aren't you...?" Malik closed his eyes halfway. "Of coarse, not meaning it in that wrong way. Just more closer bonds. Just admit it."  
  
"What?! No, of coarse not! Why would I ever like a weakling like him?!" Bakura blurted.  
  
"Okay okay, you hate him. There. Happy?" Malik waved his hands.  
  
"...But I don't literally _hate_ him. I guess...he's okay after all." Bakura spoke more seriously and hesitantly.  
  
"Aha. So you _do_ love him." Malik repeated.  
  
"I NEVER SAID LOVE!" Bakura argued. The tanned youth laughed out loud. Bakura gave back a death cold glare.  
  
"Hey, I'v been wanting to ask you ever since." Malik added.  
  
"What?" Bakura spat back coldly, not bothering to take his eyes off the boy.  
  
"You've been giving me those kind of glares all day. What's the problem here?" Malik asked curiously while scratching his head.  
  
"Heh, and I thought you would be too stupid to notice that." Bakura sneered sarcastically, smirking evilly.  
  
"Well?"  
  
"Well, I'm certain that you still remember that 'promise' you gave me?" Bakura's smirk turned into a frown. He narrowed his eyebrows. "Don't think that I'v forgotten about that. You still haven't given it to me..." he warned.  
  
"Are you taking about the millennium rod?" Malik rolled his eyes and sighed.  
  
Bakura slapped his forehead in frustration. "What _else_ would I be talking about?"  
  
"Do you have to be worrying about that now?" Malik shook his head. "Why can't you just take your mind off your evil ways for a moment and instead relax back and enjoy normal life for once. "  
  
"...I need it, Malik." Bakura ordered more seriously, eyes narrowing into smaller slits.   
  
"Well, it's obvious that I don't have it with me anymore." Malik laughed nervously. "Oh wait, you weren't even there. I gave it to Yuugi at the end after forfeiting my own defeat in the finals."  
  
"WHAT?!?"  
  
"Hey, what are you guys doing?" Ryou got caught in between the situation. Bakura and Malik both looked at him at the same time, not realizing their own actions. "Do you mind if we can back inside now? It's kinda getting colder." Ryou shivered uncontrollably.   
  
"Yeah...Sure." Bakura replied back before sending back Malik another death glare.  
  
"Um...okay. I'll make hot cocoa when we go inside." Malik gulped nervously, now trying for the attempt to avoid his yami as far away as possible as they all went back inside the house. 


	15. This isn't normal

The Christmas party over at Malik's place was overall fun the other night, but Ryou was exhausted. Ryou was a bit disappointed at the thought of missing him again when the blonde boy had told him that he had to return back to Egypt so soon. Ryou gave him a friendly hug before the teen left for his trip back to his home, and Ryou also had the chance to see Yuugi and Yami again in a while since everyone was there, and he was happy to see them.  
  
Ryou sighed quietly to himself, removing the earphones from his ears as he carefully placed the cd player back on the desk that he had been currently listening to this morning. Promptly flopping off the bed the teen strode out of his room, yawning weakly, before finally forcing himself to call out Bakura's name in curiosity to find the white haired boy in the house, however, no unexpected answer was given back to him. Ryou grew more worried and suspicious.  
  
"Where is he?" he thought to himself mentally. The boy continued searching possibly everywhere, still, no sign of his yami in sight; this made Ryou almost lose his patients. He peeked his head in the bathroom. It was empty. Ryou tried for the attempt to call Bakura's name again, but suddenly stopped himself, knowing the obvious fact if Bakura wasn't even inside the house, he couldn't find him no where else. The only place that he hadn't checked yet was the... kitchen, somewhere Bakura wouldn't even bother going for no apparent reason anyways, but Ryou decided to check the place instead.  
  
Ryou sniffed to smell the odd smell in the air above him. No, it wasn't bad. It smelled alot like food, but he wasn't really sure for himself. Ryou walked into the kitchen as he followed the smell leading him, for him to finally come to the exact spot where he was suddenly standing speechless at the sight right in front of his own eyes. What an unbelievable scene he saw was Bakura struggling roughly and intensively to crack a simple egg on the frying pan below him. Ryou glanced around the kitchen to realize everything was a complete mess. He knew if his father was here to see this he would be angry and disappointed in him, luckily for him he lived alone at the moment. His jaw dropped.  
  
Ryou's eyes fixed back upon the furious yami, for him to now notice that he saw Bakura was wearing a light blue apron tied carelessly around his waist that had random stain patterns everywhere, at this exact point Ryou suddenly couldn't restrain himself from the laughter that was waiting inside his throat. The boy started giggling to himself as he slowly walked towards the other boy, however, Bakura still didn't recognize his presence. Ryou coughed softly and cleared his throat to gain his composure back again.  
  
"Um, Bakura? What are you doing?..."  
  
He tilted his head closer to get a better glance at the yami's face up close. Suddenly startled, Bakura gasped sharply as he jumped at least an inch off his own feet from the ground, before completely ruining the procedure that he had been working with at the moment.  
  
"DON'T SCARE ME LIKE THAT!" Bakura screamed, still slightly panicking from the previous reaction. "God dammit! Are you trying to get me a heart attack?!"  
  
"Gomen... but what were you doing? I was looking everywhere for you."  
  
"What does it look like?" Bakura rolled his eyes in annoyance. "I'm trying to torture this egg with one of my favorite torturing methods..."  
  
"...Were you trying to cook?" Ryou's eyes widened.  
  
".....Yes."  
  
"Why? I didn't know you actually cooked food..." Ryou trailed off, his own soft voice dying at the end of his own sentence.  
  
"I don't!" Bakura blurted defensively. "This was my first try ever."  
  
"...But you don't even eat that much." Ryou pointed out slowly.  
  
"I think I already knew that, Ryou." Bakura started more calmy, before turning his body to face the table in front of him. Ryou looked at him oddly before glancing back at the same table that Bakura was staring at. Ryou's eyes immediately widened in total shock. He quickly ran towards the table and glanced around in pure surprise.  
  
"Wow! You made all this Bakura?!" Ryou practically shouted ecstatically.  
  
"Well..." Bakura started sheepishly, gently brushing his cheek with his fore finger while looking away. "It's not much though, so I don't know why your making such a big deal out of it. I didn't even know I had it in me until this morning."  
  
Ryou was completely and literally blown away. His own yami... cooking. At first, he couldn't believe even imagining Bakura actually 'trying' to cook food, it just plainly didn't sound like the same person Ryou knew of him, and so suddenly. It just didn't make any sense at all.  
  
"...If you didn't make this for yourself, then who did you make it for?" Ryou asked curiously.  
  
"You have to eat, don't you?"  
  
"Y-You made this for me...?" Ryou asked in awe.  
  
"Of coarse I made it for you!" Bakura finally shouted. "You haven't been eating properly these weeks so someone had to at least make you something decent once in awhile. You know your supposed to be eating healthy even when your sick."  
  
"Oh..." Ryou trailed off.  
  
"Well, are you going to sit or not?"  
  
"Oh! Yeah...." Ryou quietly sat down on the empty chair sitting beside him. Bakura sat down promptly on the other opposite side and carefully watched the teen. Ryou began eating his food silently in a comfortable manner. Bakura only continued to watch him eat intently, making Ryou suddenly grow more hesitant and uncomfortable at the other teen staring at him.  
  
"What?" Ryou finally broke the silence.  
  
"So... do you like it?" Bakura spoke, eyes closing happily while a small genuine smile was placed upon his lips with both of his hands resting on top of his lap. The darker boy chuckled softly in proper manner.  
  
Ryou looked at him with an odd expression. "H-He's... actually smiling?" Ryou thought mentally. "He looks so.... different."  
  
"Hello? You don't like it, do you?" Bakura suddenly demanded more coldly, brows narrowing more seriously.  
  
"Oh no! I like it... it's just..." Ryou stopped while slowly inserting the spoon into his mouth.  
  
"...I'v never seen this side of you before. Thats all." Ryou finished hesitantly.  
  
"Well, now you did." Bakura told him simply. Ryou blushed.  
  
"Aren't you going to eat some?" Ryou offered softly.  
  
"I don't need to." Bakura stated confidently.  
  
"Well, at least you can try some..."  
  
"Nah, it's okay." Bakura gestured before finally sighing out loud. "I'm bored..." he mumbled out of nowhere. "You know... it was actually pretty fun on that day we hung out. I want to experience more new things..." he allowed a small smile.  
  
Ryou struggled through the small choke inside his throat. To him, Bakura was acting awfully different today. The teen continued staring at the yami's calm face. Was he in a good mood for some reason? Ryou quickly shook that thought out of his mind. Ryou was still suspicious from all the situations that had happened. Bakura seemed more... nice. Maybe it was a practical joke---maybe he was being truthful, or even maybe he was finally.... changing.  
  
"Oh, we can go somewhere today if you want." Ryou smiled.  
  
"Where?"  
  
"I don't know. The park?" Ryou asked.  
  
"The park?" Bakura raised a brow. "What can we possibly do there?"  
  
"I don't know, at least we can have some fresh air, or either we can just walk and talk."  
  
"Fine." Bakura sighed.  
  
"Why? You don't want to go now?"  
  
"No, I was just expecting something more fun." Bakura mumbled disappointingly.  
  
"Well, then you can pick." Ryou insisted.  
  
"I don't know where else." Bakura answered quickly.  
  
"Why not just the park?"  
  
"Because you don't sound very enthusiastic."  
  
"I do want to go." Ryou stated.  
  
"...Okay."  
  
"I'll get ready now then," Ryou took the last bite before walking back to the room to change into his warm clothes.  
  
#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&  
  
The two teens walked silently and slowly. Ryou took a quick glance back at Bakura, who was being awfully too quiet. Ryou wondered why the darker boy wasn't talking much. He sighed, tilting his head up to the sky to view the grey clouds above him.  
  
"It's not snowing today." Ryou frowned.  
  
"Oh really?" Sarcasm took over Bakura's voice.  
  
"Are you still mad?"  
  
"Why would I be mad? I was never mad." Bakura told him simply.  
  
"Well, it sounded like you were before."  
  
"I'm. Not. Mad." Bakura spoke more firmly, emphasizing his point.  
  
"Okay." Ryou's eyes then slowly fixed upon the scarf Bakura was wearing around his neck.  
  
"What?" Bakura finally asked out loud, noticing the other boy's staring.  
  
"You're wearing that scarf I gave you for Christmas." Ryou smiled.  
  
"Oh... I couldn't find my old one, so I decided to wear this today." Bakura replied slowly.  
  
"It looks nice on you." Ryou complimented happily.  
  
"Whatever," the boy responded back flatly.  
  
The two teens then finally came across a small bench nearby. Bakura walked pass him idly and sat down lazily, hands still kept inserted inside his pockets.  
  
"Can we rest? I'm tired..."  
  
"Sure." Ryou sat down beside him.  
  
"It's cold." Bakura grumbled, slumping lower down on the bench.  
  
"Your complaining awfully alot today." Ryou had finally noticed his reations towards everything so far all day.  
  
"Is that a problem...?" Bakura demanded gently.  
  
"No. I just noticed, that's all." Ryou replied simply.  
  
"...Baka."  
  
"Hey, Bakura?" Ryou started softly.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Can I ask you a question?" Ryou asked hesitantly, fiddling his fingers around.  
  
"What is it?" Bakura asked somewhat suspiciously.  
  
"Why are you, um, being in such a good mood today?"  
  
"Hmm, good question Ryou. Why am I being in such a good mood today." Bakura pondered momentairly. "...Maybe because that stupid bastard finally left?" He added.  
  
"Malik?"  
  
"Who else?"  
  
"He's not a bastard." Ryou frowned.  
  
"Okay, then he's a 'stupid' bastard." Bakura said simply, smirking confidently.  
  
Ryou frowned more. "Why do you hate him so much?"  
  
"Do you remember when he made that deal with me in the past?"  
  
"I think so..." Ryou spoke slowly.  
  
"...He still hasn't given it to me, bastard. I'll be sure to kill him the next time I see him." Bakura muttered lowly. "Besides, it's nothing big of a deal since I already hated him ever since anyways."  
  
Ryou's eyes slightly widened in surprise. "...Your still after the..."  
  
Bakura smirked evilly. "Why are you so surprised? Were you thinking of me as a different person all along?"  
  
"No, of coarse I knew... its just...." Ryou trailed off slowly, slightly disappointed.  
  
Ryou thought to himself for a moment. "...Are you sure it's only because of him, or are you hiding something else?"  
  
"What would I be hiding?!" Bakura suddenly shouted out too loud in public while instantly standing up on his feet in frustration. Odd expressions given from different faces all around him were staring confusingly, for Bakura to finally notice this for himself. The boy quickly slapped a hand over his mouth after a several seconds to finally realize his own actions. Ryou's eyes widened in surprise.  
  
"Sorry..." Bakura spoke more softly with a muffled sound, hand still over his mouth. Ryou only sighed, burying his face in his hand while shaking disappointingly.  
  
"Look what you made me do." Bakura growled, finally removing his hand.  
  
"Why are you blaming me?" Ryou gave him an innocent look.  
  
"Um, can we leave now?" Bakura looked around at the people still staring at them. Ignoring the teen, he quickly grabbed his arm and dragged him out of the park. 


	16. I'm sorry

The day went by pretty quickly. Ryou made the decision to take Bakura to one final place before going back home since it was getting pretty late, a place where Bakura wasn't very fond of that well either than the electric store he went to the other day with Ryou.  
  
Bakura stared half curiously down at the dessert sitting simply right below him. He glanced back up at the boy with a slight look of discust upon in his face. "Look Ryou, I'v already said that I don't have to eat."  
  
"Try it. It's good." Ryou pleaded.  
  
"Well... okay. Just one bite then."  
  
Ryou watched carefully and silently while the darker boy slowly and relunctantly picked the spoon off from the table sitting beside him. Ryou smiled happily when the boy finally took the first bite of the ice cream into his mouth. Bakura, even surprised for himself, actually found the thing quite good for the first time.  
  
"Do you like it?"  
  
"It's... pretty good." Bakura admitted. "But why are we eating ice cream on a cold day?" He asked curiously again.  
  
"It doesn't really matter to me. I eat it when ever I feel like it." Ryou replied simply, taking a small lick out of his own with his tongue. "I just like basically any kind of desserts."  
  
"You mean the ones you see in Egypt or any where else?" Bakura made a slight pause.  
  
Ryou only laughed out loud. "No, I'm talking about the food." Bakura stood silent momentarily, still slightly confused from what the boy was talking about.  
  
"...What's a dessert?" He finally asked. Ryou stared at him with a slightly surprised look.  
  
"You don't know? You know... like the ones we eat after a real meal?"  
  
"Kind of like a snack?" Bakura asked again.  
  
"Yeah, it's almost the same thing." Ryou suddenly laughed out loud at the sudden thought coming across his mind.  
  
"What's so funny?" Bakura demanded more seriously.  
  
"I don't blame you. Yami goes through the same thing sometimes; he doesn't know much about random things like this."  
  
"Geez, give me a break. Sorry that I haven't gotten out more to know alot about the things you already do." Bakura responded offensively with the sudden change of attitude.  
  
"I'm not saying it in a bad way." Ryou smiled.  
  
"I love ice cream! Let's get some guys!" Ryou suddenly heard a familiar voice behind him. It belonged to Jounouchi Katsuya. Ryou realized Yuugi and his small gang arrived shortly not too long after him and Bakura sat down and ate. Joey frantically ran up the counter and drooled heavily. "I need... ice cream." the blonde duelist moaned with desperate hunger. "You can't really stop Joey when it comes to food." Yuugi chuckled.  
  
"I have to agree with you on that." Honda spoke bluntly. Anzu only giggled along with Yuugi and Yami. Ryou turned back to Bakura, who was glaring at the hyper blonde teen.  
  
"Do you want to go say hi?" Ryou smiled.  
  
"I guess."  
  
"But promise me one thing..."  
  
"What is it?"  
  
"That you wouldn't kill anyone." Ryou frowned. "Especially Yuugi or Yami. Your not dueling a dark game with him again like what happened back in Battle City." He warned.  
  
"Don't worry. I'm not interested right now anyways." Bakura rolled his eyes.  
  
"Okay-" Ryou was about to finish his sentence when he was instantly interrupted by Yuugi's voice. "Ryou! What are you doing here?" The short duelist asked excitedly. "Oh, I'm... just eating some ice cream with Bakura before I go back home." The white haired boy smiled politely back at him. "Bakura?" Yuugi's eyes slowly fixed upon the twin darker boy sitting across from Ryou.  
  
"Hi, Yuugi," Bakura attempted to put on a small genuine smile.  
  
"Ryou!" Came Joey's blurt unexpectedly when Yuugi never got the chance to reply back to Bakura's greeting. The blonde teenager and the rest of the gang left behind ran up to the white haired teen. "What are you doing here?" Joey grinned, holding two overly large cones in both of his full hands. Everyone was shown wearing their wintry warm outfit, including the pharaoh as well.  
  
"Hi, Jounouchi." Ryou waved. Yami was the next person to greet the boy, but soon noticed Bakura's glare focused upon him. The pharaoh was a bit surprised to find him here. "WHAT?! HE'S HERE?!" Joey suddenly shouted frantically, glaring daggers at Bakura who sat only silently. "What the hell is he doing here?!"  
  
"He's... well, with me." Ryou told him simply. Ignoring him, Joey growled and walked menacingly towards to grab the collar of Bakura's coat. "What are you up to now?!" He demanded furiously.  
  
"...Let go of me." Bakura warned dangerously and maliciously, also grabbing the other's collar. "If you don't want to die... puppy dog." He smirked sarcastically at the end, sending the blonde boy back a couple of steps on his feet.  
  
"What did you just call me?!" The boy screamed, attempting to attack the other boy, however, he was too late when Honda restrained him back. "Lemme go Honda! I'll get that bastard! I'll kill him!" Joey struggled furiously and stubbornly. Anzu only shook her head in frustration.  
  
"Calm down Jounouchi." Yuugi blurted.  
  
"Yuugi, can I talk to you for a moment outside?" Ryou interrupted gently. Yuugi gave him an innocent look. "Um, sure."  
  
#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&  
  
"Ryou..." Yuugi stared at him shockingly.  
  
"Please Yuugi, give him a chance." Ryou frowned.  
  
"But Ryou... he's evil-"  
  
"No, he's not." Ryou interrupted . "Well, at least I know that he has a heart, and I'v seen it once."  
  
"But Ryou, we can't forgive him for what he has already done to us. How can you be so sure that you can just trust him now?"  
  
"I do trust him." the white haired teen sighed quietly, a small smile forming on his lips. "He's been so good to me ever since... to tell you the truth Yuugi..."  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"...I now found inside of myself that I would like to get to know him more better. I'v never really had the chance to interact with him much, and it's also a new experience to him for me to show him how to live a normal life. He's starting to open up to it gradually more every day, because he once told me that he would actually like to experience new things as well..." Ryou smiled sadly. "I don't know much about his past life when he once told me about it, but I'm determined to help him get his full memory back again. Like... how you helped Yami with his..."  
  
"Ryou... I never knew you felt that way about him. I'm sorry..." Yuugi apologized.  
  
"I'm sure something horrible made him to turn out like the person he is right now, but I'm not sure what it was. Something... about his past. The darkness... and loneliness he might of felt deep inside his heart back then. I would like to find out why Yuugi." Ryou frowned somewhat sadly, slowly glancing back at the fogged glass window where he saw Bakura happily finishing his ice cream inside the store.  
  
"Just look at him Yuugi." Ryou only smiled at the sight he was seeing right before his eyes. "He's changing..."  
  
"I understand now, Ryou." Yuugi nodded slowly as he also watched the yami.  
  
"Yuugi, I don't hate him anymore..." Ryou paused for a second, afraid whether to tell the tri colored hair boy what he was about to say next. "...I like him." He confessed quietly.  
  
Complete dead silence then took over the two teen's moment of conversation. A cold wind blew by swiftly, gently tussling their long hairs. Yuugi was almost speechless at the words that the teen had just said.  
  
"We've never been so close before, and I'm still surprised how everything finally turned out to be exactly the way I'v always wanted at the end."  
  
"But Ryou, he's... insane." Yuugi spoke with a small hint of fear in his voice.  
  
"I know." Ryou sighed softly. "But he's gotten alot better. He isn't that crazy as much like he used to be."  
  
"As long as he doesn't try to kill one of us..." Yuugi gulped.  
  
"He won't. Please, can you guys try thinking of him differently from now on? Let's try to forget about the past and focus more what's in the present."  
  
"Sure Ryou." Yuugi smiled happily.  
  
"I'm sure the others will understand as well when you tell them about it. Tell Jounouchi not to hate him too much, and most importantly, please tell Yami about this. I'm sure he'll understand it better than anyone else other than just you. I don't want those two always hating each other forever..." Ryou sighed.  
  
"I don't think Yami hates him that much..." Yuugi spoke softly. "Yami told me once that he talked to Bakura when he was at the hospital a couple of months ago. He told me that he and Bakura were actually having a conversation for once."  
  
"Really?" Ryou had no idea until now. "I-I didn't know..." Yuugi only nodded in response.  
  
"...D-Did Yami tell you anything else on what happened that day after I got out?" Ryou suddenly asked with hesitation.  
  
"I don't think so. Why?" Yuugi asked suspiciously.  
  
"Oh, it's nothing..." Ryou lightly shook his head.  
  
"No, what is it Ryou? You can tell me anything." Yuugi asked again more worriedly, gently grabbing the boy's shoulders.  
  
"I-I just... can't tell you Yuugi..." the white haired teen responded softly, feeling his own voice slightly tremble.  
  
"I can keep a secret if you want Ryou." The shorter boy comforted. The white haired teen slowly shook his head.  
  
"I..."  
  
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&  
  
"Where the hell are those two?" Jounouchi asked curiously, growing more impatient at the fact that it was taking longer than he had though. "I have no idea..." Honda shrugged confusingly. "They should of been back earlier. It's getting pretty late outside, and colder." He shivered. "Joey,"  
  
"What is it Honda?" the blonde teen yawned.  
  
"Don't embarrass yourself next time. You know you can't beat him..." Honda chuckled teasingly.  
  
"Yes, I can! I can whoop that bastard's ass anyday. Damn, I need to teach that guy some manners."  
  
"Your the one who started the whole thing." Honda crossed his arms over his chest.  
  
"Can you blame me? He hurts Ryou purposely, and that's something I can't stand." Joey sighed.  
  
"Well, if he was trying to hurt him constantly then why were both of them eating ice cream at a place like this?" Honda cupped his chin and pondered somewhat suspiciously. "Chh, the evil spirit of the ring eating ice cream is something I won't believe any day." Joey scoffed. "Actually he was." Honda corrected bluntly.  
  
"What?!"  
  
"Look for yourself, man." Honda pointed a finger towards the table where Bakura was sitting previously.  
  
"He's not there baka."  
  
"What?" Honda quickly turned his head around to face the table behind him, for him to realize that the blonde teenager was correct. "Hey, where'd he go?" he turned his head back and forth.  
  
"I told you that you couldn't trust the guy." Joey gritted his teeth and growled softly.  
  
"Hey, Yami is missing too." Honda noticed that the two spirits were nowhere to be found.  
  
"Damn." Joey cursed lowly.  
  
#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&  
  
"What do you want?" Bakura demanded strictly, but gently. The yami crossed his arms over his chest and leaned his back against the wall standing behind him.  
  
"I want you to tell me how Ryou is doing." Yami spoke firmly, inserting his hands into the pocket of his coat. Somewhere between a small laugh and a scoff escaped from the white haired boy's mouth.  
  
"Is that the only reason why you wanted to talk to me?"  
  
"Tell me." The pharaoh narrowed his eyes.  
  
Bakura smirked smugly. "If you wanna know so bad, go ask him yourself."  
  
"Bakura..." Yami started softly.  
  
"Why do you want to know anyways?" The taller boy demanded, eyes narrowing seriously.  
  
"Because I'm worried about him."  
  
"There's nothing wrong with him." Bakura frowned.  
  
"You already obviously know what's wrong..." Yami sighed heavily.  
  
"Your point?"  
  
"...It's already been past two months Bakura, and I can already see that his condition is getting worse; I'v seen it."  
  
"There's nothing wrong with him." Bakura repeated himself more slowly and firmly. "Don't argue with me..." the boy warned.  
  
"...Do you still love him?" The pharaoh questioned simply. Bakura's eyes slightly widened, gasping softly, unaware of the other's question and speechless for himself. The white haired teen was silent for seemingly like eternity. A cold wind blew through the alley, small strands of white locks gently brushing against his face. The boy didn't know what the difficult reason was to not allow him to answer the question.  
  
"If you did love him... you would of known more better than that." Yami frowned disappointingly.  
  
"I---I don't. I don't love him..." Bakura spoke quietly, voice slightly trembling in unsure denial. His once emotionless dark brown eyes suddenly softened, attempting to hide his face from the other and gaze down at the ground beneath him with a somewhat sorrow expression. The pharaoh could sense different but confusing emotions flowing from the boy.  
  
"What were you and Ryou doing here a while ago?" Yami asked gently, changing the subject.  
  
"He wanted to show me some places around Domino City. I haven't really gotten out and experienced a normal life like everyone else, so he decided to help me get used to it once in a while." Bakura responded. Yami's eyes widened.  
  
"You?"  
  
"Whats with the look on your face?" The boy demanded. "I want to and I enjoy it, is that so shocking to you?" It was Yami's turn to be silent for a while.  
  
"No..." Yami answered confusingly.  
  
"Don't think that I'm here to fight you for your puzzle. I'm not interested at the moment." Bakura spoke calmy while glancing back at the tri colored teen. Yami couldn't believe the fact that Bakura wasn't planning on taking his puzzle. It triggered his mind that he remembered that Bakura had always been constantly trying to complete his mission no matter what, but for the boy to tell him this; it was very unlike him.  
  
"How can you be so sure that I can trust you, Bakura?"  
  
"Because Ryou trusts me." Bakura closed his eyes and the smirk returned back to his lips.  
  
"It's cold... I'm going back in..." He turned his back and slowly walked away from the formal pharaoh.  
  
"Bakura..."  
  
#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&#&  
  
Yuugi stared at the white haired boy with impossibly wide eyes mixed with both fear and pure shockness. He couldn't believe what the boy had just told him seconds ago. The tri colored hair teen trembled, falling in a kneeling position beside the other, both completely speechless and his muscles tensed.  
  
"I'm---I'm sorry I had to tell you that Yuugi." Ryou apologized softly, voice still trembling. "I knew I had to tell you sooner or later. I-I'm sorry I kept it from you ever since-"  
  
"Ryou, why didn't you tell me..." Yuugi whimpered.  
  
"I didn't want to cause you any pain. Please, don't tell anyone else about it. Can you promise me?" Ryou pleaded desperately.  
  
"I---I promise Ryou..." Yuugi cried. "I was worried why you were always sick..."  
  
"It's not too bad... I-I guess. I still have hope Yuugi." Ryou tried smiling more positively. "Don't worry too much about it. There might still be a cure you know..."  
  
"What did the docter say to you?" Yuugi asked curiously.  
  
"I haven't heard from him in awhile. I'm still waiting for him to tell me what's going to happen." Ryou replied. "That's why... I was willing to spend the time with Bakura as much as possible, and share the things with him that I was interested in. I was hoping that it would of helped both him and me to get more closer before-" Before Ryou could finish his sentence, his good friend couldn't help himself but to only automatically wrap his arms around him, surprising the white haired teen.  
  
"Please Ryou, you don't have to tell me anymore. I understand everything..." The shorter teen had tears welling in his violet eyes. "I understand..." He gently rubbed his friend's back soothingly.  
  
"Yuugi...."  
  
"I'm sorry that you have to go through with this. You don't deserve it! Your such a good person Ryou..." the boy choked out. "I'm sorry that I wasn't there to notice it soon enough to help out much. I would of if I'v known, but I didn't. I'm so sorry Ryou... I'm such a bad friend....and the rest goes out to everyone else." Yuugi's voice dripped with guiltiness.  
  
"Yuugi, don't say that. It's not your fault at all." Ryou comforted him gently. "You've always been a really good friend, and you'll always be..." he smiled weakly. "I-I'm glad that you came into my life..." at this exact point, Yuugi was touched by the words that the boy had just said to him. He never knew Ryou thought of him as much more than just a good friend. It shocked him, but yet so sweet...  
  
"Ryou... thank you..." Yuugi's smile brightened, wiping the tears with his hand. Ryou smiled back softly.  
  
Yuugi gently grabbed his shoulders once more, pulling him closer to his own body. "Ryou... you have to promise me that you'll be fine..." He pleaded. "Promise me that. Okay?" the boy gently shook the other, waiting for the answer he was expecting to get from the other's mouth.  
  
"I promise Yuugi." Ryou smiled again.  
  
"Ryou, I want to spend more time with you... you and me haven't really spent much time with each other as much like the other rest. I'm willing to build our relationship closer towards each other."  
  
"So do I Yuugi..." Ryou agreed. "I'v always wanted to, even if sometimes I felt left out of the group you guys were always in. I'm sorry I was always the one to cause trouble and worry in the past when Bakura wanted to harm you guys, especially Yami. I didn't want him to ruin the nice relationship I had with you guys. You guys were always so tight, but I was always the one to be neglected for some serious problems I had to always go through with, so I didn't have the time to spend more time with everyone without ever feeling uncomfortable. I want to be part of it someday..." he spoke softly.  
  
"Ryou... I never knew you felt that way..." Yuugi stared at him. "If I would of known I would of helped out what you were going through, but you never told me what was really going on inside of you."  
  
"I know. Gomen..." Ryou apologized. Yuugi only furrowed his brows and smiled.  
  
"Hey Yuugi, do you want to go back inside now? I think everyone is waiting on us. It's getting pretty cold out here..." Ryou shivered.  
  
"We should." Yuugi agreed. "Let's go,"  
  
The two good friends walked back inside the store, where they immediately got suspicious and curious stares from all around the group who had been waiting impatiently inside.  
  
"Hi, um, you guys." Yuugi smiled.  
  
"Where were you guys? We were waiting for almost an hour." Jounouchi yawned tiredly, groaning lazily.  
  
"Oh, we just had a small talk outside. It's nothing..." Yuugi replied.  
  
"Well, we should get going. It's getting pretty late." Yami announced gently, eyes focused upon his other half.  
  
"Where's Bakura?" Ryou asked curiously out loud.  
  
"I'm here." Ryou heard the yami's voice behind him. The boy turned around. "Bakura..." he instantly smiled when he saw the other standing right behind his back. Bakura then caught Ryou's eye. He returned the smile back before Jounouchi purposely stepped, or more over jumped, in their line of view. "Bye Ryou!" he grinned and waved in front of Ryou's face before leaving.  
  
Bakura gave him a small glare as the blonde boy left them alone. Everyone also waved goodbye to Ryou. It was only just him and Bakura remaining left...  
  
"Ready?" Ryou asked.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&  
  
Ryou worked silently on his big essay given as an homework assignment for one of his classes at school. The boy was growing weak every hour, the fact that he was working too hard studying for possibly every class he was taking. Sometimes he felt dizzy, but at other times he didn't as well as the pain went away.  
  
"Hey..." Bakura started.  
  
"What?" Ryou responded, focusing on his homework.  
  
"...It's nothing." the white haired yami shook his head. Ryou, still curious, slowly turned his attention back to the essay he was writing on.  
  
"Hey...." the boy spoke again.  
  
"What is it?" Ryou asked more firmly.  
  
"I----nevermind." Bakura backed down reluctantly again.  
  
Ryou was growing more suspicious. He didn't know what Bakura wanted to say to him, as if he was struggling to get a single work out of his mouth.  
  
"Oi,"  
  
"What?!" Ryou shouted clearly, instantly spinning around to now stare at the other sitting on the bed shuffing through his deck. "What.... is it?" the teen demanded more gently again, clearing his throat.  
  
"Take it easy! I was only going to ask you if you were almost done." Bakura pouted offensively, shouting back.  
  
"Yes, I'm almost done. Why?"  
  
"Because I'm bored."  
  
"Is that all you ever say now?" Ryou sighed softly, continuing to finish his work.  
  
Leaving the deck sitting beside him Bakura flopped off the bed, walking over to him. He stood beside the sitting teenager, arching his neck foward to stare down at the paper below him as he lowered his head next to the boy. "What are you working on?" he asked curiously.  
  
"English." Ryou replied simply.  
  
"Chh. Looks boring." Bakura scoffed, shrugging his shoulders. "Why waste time on something like this crap?"  
  
"It's not like I want to do it either. I have to." Ryou frowned.  
  
"Can't you just skip it?" Bakura questioned simply.  
  
"Of course not! I'll get in trouble if I do."  
  
"What could possibly happen?" Bakura smirked, trying to act innocently.  
  
"Why don't you go to school one day to find out?" Ryou told him, attempting to hid a laugh behind his voice.  
  
"Maybe I will." Bakura gasped sarcatically before grinning, acting excited.  
  
"Hontou?" Ryou's eyes widened in surprise, however, it never made him realize that he didn't even have the slightest clue that Bakura was only being sarcastic. "You could come with me then." he said ecstatically.  
  
"No." Bakura suddenly stated seriously, the fake grin instantly fading on his face.  
  
"But, I thought---"  
  
"I was only joking, baka." Bakura almost threw his head back and cackled evilly by the other's own stupidity. Ryou only frowned.  
  
"...Right." he replied back dully, and forced out a small unsure laugh.  
  
"Hey Ryou.... I need to tell you---" Bakura suddenly started softly, wanting to explain what he had wanted to tell the teen for the last couple of days on what was on his mind, but he was soon instantly cut off by Ryou's sudden gasp; this caused Bakura to lose that chance...  
  
It wasn't too long until Ryou noticed a small red line trickling down his nose. He slowly reached up and placed a finger on the liquid. He gently pulled it back, to find blood now coated on his fingers.  
  
"What's wrong?" Bakura asked curiously.  
  
"I-It's nothing." Ryou stuttered.  
  
"What do you mean it's nothing. I heard that." Bakura replied suspiciously. He quickly grabbed the boy's wrist and brought it up.  
  
"You call this nothing?" Bakura sighed and narrowed his brows. "Your bleeding..."  
  
Ryou quickly jerked back his arm. "I said I'm okay."  
  
"Your bleeding because your tired. Now, go to bed." Without giving Ryou a second chance to reply back, he scooped the other boy into his arms and carried him over to his own bed nearby. At first Ryou tensed, but immediately relaxed afterwards realizing the fact that Bakura was holding him in his arms again.  
  
Bakura gently laid him on the bed, pulling the sheets over the exhausted boy. "Goodnight." Bakura turned his back to walk out the teen's room when he felt a small hand grasp his own. He stopped.  
  
"Stay wth me for a while..." Ryou smiled tiredly.  
  
The thought that then came across his Bakura's mind was imagining the same exact moment when this occured to him when he was back at the hospital being with Ryou, back in the beginning when he knew for himself that everything was so different, however, this time he instead returned the smile back to the teenager and sat himself down on the bed beside the other. He leaned himself closer to the boy and relunctantly reached his hand out to cup the other's warm cheek in his palm. Ryou happily leaned himself to it, closing his eyes while gently kissing the other's hand below.  
  
"Ryou, I..." Bakura's voice trembled. Ryou stared up at him with curiosity, revealing his innocent eyes. "I-It's nothing...." he finished.  
  
"Okay." Ryou smiled. It didn't surprise him when Ryou continued kissing softly down his own wrist. At this exact point, Bakura couldn't help himself to desperately tell the other what was really on his mind; he wanted to finish that last sentence, but he just couldn't make himself come to it, instead, he only stared at the boy with softened eyes.  
  
"...Can you kiss me?" Ryou pleaded so suddenly. Bakura was completely silent or a while, however, he didn't struggle through with the decision this time and instead allowed himself to be less hesitant. The darker boy closed his eyes and slowly lowered his head to the other until their lips finally met with one another, and Ryou felt like melting into the sweet bliss.  
  
Bakura felt the teen's hands fist into the back of his hair, bringing him closer, and Bakura's hand never left Ryou's face. After a while, Bakura finally broke the kiss by pulling away. Ryou smiled at him again.  
  
Bakura smiled at him as Ryou fell fast asleep. His eyes fixed upon the clock on Ryou's desk; it read 12:00 a.m. The boy also noticed a small black book sitting beside the clock, and he reached his hand out to pick it up. Bakura thought it must of belonged to Ryou, much to his good memory of recognizing the book he saw once before...  
  
Bakura carefully brushed his thumb against the edges of the hard book, glancing back at the sleeping boy to make sure he wasn't awake, before finally deciding to open it. A small awkward facial expression was instantly shown casted upon his face. Bakura thought it must of been a journal, judging by the boy's small handwriting in japanese written everywhere. Of course, Bakura also knew how to read and write as well since he was speaking the language obviously. He turned to a random page, where he saw the date written "September 2" printed above the title bar.  
  
He read the entry:  
  
_Today was my birthday! I'm already 16. Oh my gosh, it feels so awkward to tell you the truth. I just wish my dad was here to say happy birthday, but he went off to another trip for his research. I'm so alone living here by myself with no one around the house. I just wished the relationship he and I have were more close...  
_  
Bakura flipped through other pages as well, at times he couldn't help but to only laugh out loud at some hilarious moments he read that he never knew about before, and at some parts he would come across more serious entrys and only frown at the thought. It was actually pretty interesting to him for him to read all these notes. Finally deciding, he promised himself to read another random last page. "I'll read more tomorrow when he doesn't know." He told himself mentally.  
  
_August 18, 2003...  
  
I was still surprisingly amazed and flattered by what he had done for me on that one day... it seemed like he just suddenly turned into a sweet and nice person, and this made me wonder if he had really truly changed his ways about how he treats me now. I could sometimes notice the look of resist and hesitation in his brown eyes that looked very much similar to my own while he did all those sweet things for me with the new sudden change in his personality. When I looked into his eyes that day when he was with me, I saw that his eyes just softened more. I couldn't really recognize the usual evil look in his narrowed eyes that he had most of the time. No, it wasn't evil looking at all... it was actually more the look of caring and concern. It was the very first time ever I saw him do that which surprised and shocked me a bit. Did he only do it for me and no one else? . . . I just smiled to myself just thinking about it.  
  
He even stayed with me on that one lonesome dark night in the cold room.  
  
Just being around with him. . . it made me feel even better already. It felt really nice. I just wanted to stay like that forever but I knew it wouldn't last too long. I just wished he acted more like this more often and showed me how he really felt towards me. . .  
  
He doesn't need to hide it from me. It seems like he fights with his own self whenever he struggles between his different actions. . I can tell by the way he stubbornly hesitates. I guess he's not really used to the new feeling he never experienced before in his entire life. . . _


	17. Loving you

Yumi: I'm back again with another new chapter! (cough) Sorry guys that I'm being so slow.

Bakura: She's been a lazy ass ever since. Plus, she gets alot of writer's block.

Yumi: Yup. (innocent smile)

Bakura: Uh, this chapter...

Yumi: Omigod, yes thanks for mentioning that. This chapter took me forever to write xx;

Bakura: Writer's block again?

Yumi: Not as worse from before (sweatdrops) Plus, I finally added the romance chapter you guys were waiting on! oO; Of course the pairing is none other than... ((squeals))

Bakura: ....Don't say it. I already know.

Yumi: You know you like it.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

**Chapter 17: Loving you**

"Moshi Moshi?" Ryou picked up the phone and answered.  
  
"Hey Ryou! I'm having a new year's party over at the game shop tonight, do you want to come?" Yuugi asked excitedly.  
  
"Sure Yuugi," Ryou smiled. "What time?"  
  
"Um, about 7:00." Yuugi replied on the other end. "Oh, and... ask Bakura if he wants to too."  
  
"He wouldn't mind anyways." Ryou told him happily.  
  
"Okay, that's great. I guess I'll see you both later then."  
  
"Okay, bye."  
  
"Ja!"

_New years eve...  
  
We were to have a party over at Yuugi's place with every body invited, including Kaiba as well. It was alot of fun, and I was glad to see everyone again...  
  
We all shared resolutions with each other for the new year that night before everyone decided to leave. Yuugi's resolution was to be a stronger person both in faith and strength, Joey's was to be a better duelist, Honda and duke wanted to build a relationship with Shizuka, Anzu's was to be more focused on her dancing career, and well... mine was...._

"Who wants to go first!" Joey blurted exactly out loud in front of the whole group.  
  
"It doesn't matter." Anzu replied.  
  
"Yuugi! You go." Joey grinned.  
  
"Me?" Yuugi squeaked softly. "Okay, I guess I'll start then. My resolutions for this year.... is to be more focused on school, and, um, I guess be stronger."  
  
"Stronger in what?" Joey asked curiously. "Be stronger in situations when tough things come up." Yuugi replied happily.  
  
"That's all?"  
  
"I don't really have much..."  
  
"Okay, I guess I'll go next." Joey announced. "My resolutions for this year to be a better duelist..." the blonde boy said quietly, closing his eyes. "SO I CAN KICK SOME ASS!" he suddenly screamed while raising a fist in the air. The boy grinned and laughed maniacally. Everyone else except Bakura and Kaiba instantly fell to the ground, groaning softly.  
  
"Just for that reason?" Yuugi asked while laughing nervously, getting back onto the seat he fell off of and rubbing the back of his head.  
  
"I didn't know puppy dog was a bad duelist." Kaiba smirked, crossing his arms.  
  
"What?! I never said that I was bad Kaiba!" Joey shrieked furiously.  
  
"You don't have to hide it you know..." the brown haired teen chuckled coldly. Joey growled, and everyone laughed.  
  
"Well then, I guess I'll go next since it's my turn." Duke smiled.  
  
"Go ahead Duke." Yuugi smiled.  
  
"My resolution for this year is to show this girl more how I feel about her, and hopefully build some sort of close relationship with her someday."  
  
By any chance your not talking about Shizuka, are you? Because it's funny that we both have the same exact resolution." Honda asked annoyingly, jealousy in his voice.  
  
"Maybeee...." the black haired teen taunted. "Besides, it's none of your business."  
  
"What?! I deserve to know dice boy!" Honda shaked his fist in front of Duke's face.  
  
"Did I just hear some jealousy in your voice Honda?" Duke taunted sarcastically.  
  
"Of course not!" Honda blushed madly, getting odd stares.  
  
"Then shut up." Duke grinned innocently. "That does it Duke!"  
  
The boy wasn't too good at reflex as Honda immediately attacked him, wrapping his arms tightly around his neck and literally choking him. Ryou and the others stared at them speechless, seeing the two boys struggling roughly and boisterously with one another. Bakura, unamused, only leaned his head against the wall behind and gave them a curious look with half closed eyes.  
  
"Is there anyone else who haven't gone yet?" Yuugi scratched his head.  
  
"Bakura hasn't!" Joey pointed quickly.  
  
It wasn't too long for Bakura to come to realize the fact that every pair of eyes were now laid staring upon him. The boy began to get slightly nervous in public.  
  
"What's yours Bakura?" Yuugi smiled. Bakura wasn't expected when nods were instantly given from the whole group, gesturing him to say something out of his mouth; this surprised him greatly.  
  
"I, um..."  
  
"Don't you have anything?" Joey asked curiously.  
  
"I... my resolution for the new year is to..." Bakura spoke hesitantly. "Try to be a better person..."  
  
Everyone was completely silent, however, Ryou was the only person out of the whole group to smile at him, and Bakura noticed the look on his face.  
  
"Wow..." Honda scratched his head. "Never knew it was in you..." Anzu shoved him in the side. "Ouch!" Bakura gazed down at the ground.  
  
"Oh, what about you Ryou?" Yuugi asked.  
  
"Me?" Ryou laughed nervously, now the one to get the attention. "Well..."  
  
"Is it something big?" Joey questioned curiously. "C'mon, tell us." The blonde teen grinned.  
  
"It's nothing much..." Ryou smiled softly. "...Just to be more closer with everyone." he finished quietly.  
  
"Aww, Ryou..." Anzu smiled.  
  
"I-It's really nothing. Just... something that came into my mind."

_When everyone except Yuugi looked at me with such curiosity written all over their faces, I knew exactly then what they were thinking... it wasn't bad, neither was it a good sign, something that I really couldn't identify clearly enough for me to realize for sure, but also confusing. I could tell that no one never actually knew what I was talking about. I wanted to tell everyone exactly what I told Yuugi the other night, but I realized it was also difficult for me to expose myself so openly, and unexpectedly. After the party was finally over, I returned back home with Bakura late at night, when I suddenly got a phone call from someone about some news, a news that shocked me so much..._

__

__

"Hello?" Ryou answered, picking up the phone.

"Ryou?" a man's voice spoke at the other end.  
  
"Y-Yes. Who's this?" Ryou stopped to pause for a moment before finishing his sentence.  
  
"Hi Ryou, do you remember me?"  
  
"...You sound very familiar, but i'm not sure." Ryou explained.  
  
"I'm the same docter you saw me a couple of months ago." the man smiled.  
  
"Oh! Yes... it's been a while." Ryou gently nodded.  
  
"Yes, it has." the young man chuckled softly.  
  
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&  
  
Bakura sat quietly on Ryou's bed, waiting for the boy to come upstairs to his own room. Bakura gazed down at the ground beneath him, sighing softly, before slowly glancing out the window sitting behind him for him to notice that it was snowing again. The yami returned his attention back to his previous position, being bored again at the thought that the day was almost over. The boy glanced around the room carelessly, until he spotted a small book laying beside the desk. Again, that same black journal he had found and read the other night when Ryou was asleep.  
  
"I forgot all about this..." Bakura spoke to himself mentally. He carefully grabbed it into his hands and opened it to where he had stopped his place before. A small bookmark was placed between the middle pages to the lastm where Ryou kept his most recent entries written down, although, it didn't really matter, because Bakura was more interested in reading his thoughts any day.  
  
_December 31, 2004  
_(_Ryou's voice_)

_...It was snowing gently, the day was much colder, and it was a pretty busy day. I went to do some gift shopping with Bakura a couple of days ago to the electronic store. We went to Malik's apartment to eat dinner. It was fun, but he had to go back to Egypt the next day. I was surprised that Bakura was actually happy that he was gone. Bakura still hated him..._  
  
_Bakura......  
  
The more I think about it... the more it slowly breaks me apart inside of me everytime I do. I go through it every single night, just sitting in my room while I'm alone, thinking, and wondering constantly that I can't get it out of my head no matter what. And then sometimes I'll just lose that control and start to break down uncontrollably at the end, crying to myself as I can't control it. The feelings and emotions deep inside me are too much for me to handle through... I may hide it, instead replaced by my usual happy smiling face, but the fake image mask outside is what really hides all the sorrowful truth within me. He just doesn't know that I do... if only he knew how much I truely felt, he would understand, but sadly, he doesn't even have the slightest clue.  
  
And then... when I see him again, I'll smile again. When he cooked for me early this morning I couldn't believe the fact, and then I knew for myself that right there... I couldn't allow myself to tell and explain to him what I was going through at the moment... not yet..._  
  
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&  
  
"So, what did you call for Doctor?" Ryou asked.  
  
"Ryou..." the man's voice grew more serious.  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"...How have you been feeling lately?" he asked genuinely.  
  
"...I'v been fine." Ryou replied, smiling.  
  
"Ryou, please tell me the truth." The man frowned.  
  
"Well, sometimes I feel alright, but sometimes I don't, but I'v been taking medicines as well."  
  
"Are you struggling through alot?"  
  
"Not really these days, but I'm sure I'm okay... for now..." Ryou sighed softly.  
  
"Ryou, the reason why I called you was because..." he paused.  
  
"What is it?" Ryou asked curiously, half suspicious.  
  
"...We still haven't found out what we're going to do with you... in other words, Ryou, we still haven't found the right cure for you." The docter informed gently.  
  
"...W-What?" Ryou spoke more quietly.  
  
"It's been a while hasn't it, and it's getting worse. Am I correct?" the man asked again.  
  
"Y-Yes, it is." Ryou responded shakily.  
  
"Ryou, I'm sorry to say this, but I'm afraid it's already too late to do anything now..." he spoke more softly.  
  
"But... why? Can't you do anything at all?" Ryou stuttered frantically, voice slightly trembling.  
  
"Well, the only hope for you is that if you will be able to get a heart transplant from someone who is willing to donate one to you, but at the moment we haven't found anyone.."  
  
"A... transplant?" Ryou's eyes widened.  
  
"Yes, but it's really rare now. The other choice is that if you don't get it, you'll... die. There is no other way except that one option." he forced himself to inform the boy. Ryou, speechless for himself, was obviously shocked by the awful news. The boy almost choked out a small cry through the phone, difficult for him to actually believe what he was hearing.  
  
"I'm sorry to tell you this Ryou. I just... had to let you know." the man apologized gently, growing worried for the boy.  
  
"I-It's okay..." Ryou responded polietly. "...Thanks anyways. Please excuse me, I have to go now."  
  
"Take care Ryou."  
  
The boy hung up the phone, dropping it to the ground by the cord hanging above. Ryou instantly fell to his knees on the ground, pure shock written across all over his miserable face. It wasn't too long until he began sobbing softly and quietly, but he somehow couldn't let it all out at once right at the very moment, and he wasn't for sure why...  
  
"W-Why..." Ryou whispered softly, repeating the same question over again inside his head, fisting his hands into the ground. 

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

When Ryou returned back to the room, he noticed Bakura was sitting on top of the bed calmly gazing outside the window with his own composure, but mixed with a small amount of sadness as well. He sat motionless and silently, impressing somewhat he was actually enjoying the scene and view outside the fogged glass. From the side view of where Ryou was currently standing, he saw his yami blink a couple of times from behind his white bangs that fell loosely over his attractive facial features. Bakura closed his eyes and sighed softly.  
  
Ryou gave out a small wave to catch his attention, but the boy guessed that he didn't really notice him, and he slightly arched his brow upward. It seemed to Ryou that Bakura almost lost himself since it looked like he was too busy watching the snowflakes randomly fall to the ground one by one, judging by the calm expression he had on his face. But Ryou couldn't help but only smile. The teen continued to stare at him, leaning his back against the wooden door and wrapping his arms around his waist. He continued to watch Bakura with some sort of amusement that was casted upon his now staring eyes.  
  
Finally noticing Ryou's presence and allowing the curtain to fall back again in its own place, Bakura instantly drew his attention back and his eyes focused back to him. The darker boy stared for a couple of seconds, revealing his rare and unusual more softened brown eyes that now appeared to be alot similar to Ryou's. He slightly opened his mouth to appear like he was going say something, but he reluctantly backed down. Ryou soon saw a small smile slowly spreading its way across his lips in return. No, it wasn't the usual evil smirk this time that was always played viciously upon his lips, but a real genuine smile that the boy saw him never do before. Ryou always wondered and imagined what his smile would look like, and he wanted to see it for once---he wondered if it really looked much similar to his own, however, he was wrong. It looked completely different, but it was still real soft and gentle. Finally taking his eyes off him, Bakura turned his attention back to the window in front of him.  
  
For Ryou to see him like this, it bothered him. Bakura hadn't really talked to him all day ever since they both came back from the party. Slowly approaching his darker half, he finally made the decision to just sit down next to him on the bed. Ryou sighed softly before glancing back at the same window Bakura stared outside a minute ago.  
  
"It's beautiful...isn't it?"  
  
"Well duh. Why else would I be looking at it then?" Bakura scoffed, but of course Ryou knew he was only joking by the soft laugh he forced out at the end. Ryou smiled at him, shifting his body more closely to Bakura's. Ryou rested his head against him, and Bakura felt his hand grasp his own. Bakura sighed once more before finally taking the boy's fingers to caress it with his own.  
  
"It's too bad that it can't last forever. It's sad...isn't it?" Ryou's eyes closed halfway and he softly sighed out loud, frowning in mild depression.  
  
"What? Snow isn't permanent?" Bakura blinked at him in a odd way.  
  
"No, of course it's not. The only time when it would snow would only be during the cold seasons, so it's a really rare thing to actually see it even during in winter around here."  
  
"Oh," the last smile on Bakura's face had been replaced by a frown deepened in disappointment at the thought.  
  
"Hey... Bakura?"  
  
"Hmm?" the darker boy replied back softly, still not bothering to take his eyes off the window.  
  
"...I want to see it again someday. Do you think...you could be there to see it with me?" Ryou silently and patiently waited for his response. "I don't know how long that will take, but if I ever get the last chance at least..." Bakura finally took his eyes off the window, looking down at him. Ryou only smiled back.  
  
"Do you promise?" Ryou was speaking too softly for Bakura to even barely hear. He smiled at the darker boy.  
  
"Wait, your saying that ll this could disappear sooner or later?" Bakura asked slowly with the sudden hesitation in his voice. Ryou slowly nodded to his question.  
  
"What...do you mean by last chance...?" Bakura finally asked hesitantly, although he already knew well exactly what the boy was relating the subject to.  
  
Bakura then slowly turned his head towards to the youth's own direction to face and stare down at him, for him to now realize that Ryou already had several tears glistening in his eyes, and it shocked him. Complete dead silence then suddenly took over as none of them even spoke a single word afterwards, until Bakura finally spoke.  
  
"Ryou.... what's wrong?" he gestured comfortingly with his rare soft and gentle voice, carefully grabbing the boy's shoulder with his hands. He slowly pulled Ryou back away from him, allowing himself to come in better contact with him.  
  
"..I can't...I just can't..." Ryou spoke more slowly through quiet sobs. He kept his head low in an attempt to keep his eyes away from Bakura.  
  
It even surprised Ryou himself that he began letting out loud sobs at the end, and he soon realized that tears started cascading down his face. The truth was.... that it took awhile for Ryou to finally realize for himself that he really did only have a small amount of time left to live after all these past months. His condition was already getting more worse every month, and it was already obvious that he couldn't make that promise with Bakura, but on the other hand he wanted to keep it as well. A strong emotion of sudden fear and frustration that Ryou couldn't desperately control gradually took over him. He was now afraid, just afraid of everything what could possibly happen sooner or later.  
  
Ryou slowly slid his body off the bed he was sitting on. He felt his own shaking knees weaken as he soon fell and landed down onto the floor in a kneeling position. Ryou bawled more violently while burying his face into both of his trembling hands. Tears ran through past the small opening spaces between his fingers as he couldn't even control himself. Bakura, obviously unexpected, just stared at him with wide eyes.  
  
He soon felt Bakura's presence kneel down beside his fallen body, and he didn't bother looking at him. Ryou continued crying miserably until he soon felt a warm hand touch and hold his face. The white haired boy slightly opened his eyes through the blurry vision that his tears had caused, and saw Bakura softly brushing his cheek to get rid of them.  
  
Ryou couldn't handle going through this kind of situation----he knew it would hurt both him and Bakura greatly. Ignoring the hand holding his face, he quickly got back up on his feet to leave the room, but he didn't know Bakura stopped his own actions by grabbing his arm.  
  
"Where are you going?" Bakura asked more firmly, eyes narrowing.  
  
"It's none of your business, so just leave me alone." Ryou tried yet again to throw his arm away from Bakura's grip, however, the same result happened as well.  
  
"You never answered my question!" Bakura was frustrated off by the boy's behaivor. This time he tried forcefully grabbing him by the shoulders and turned his body around to face him. Ryou had more tears welling up in his eyes, unexpected and shocked by Bakura's sudden change of behaivor. Bakura's eyes softened more again after noticing the look in his eyes.  
  
"I-I...just..wanted to leave...is that wrong of---" Ryou stuttered fearfully, feeling his own voice break again at the end.  
  
Not letting him finish his own sentence Bakura grabbed him quickly pulling him into a tight embrace, not even giving him any chance to break free what so ever. Ryou frantically tried pushing him off, but his arms were too strong. Ryou whimpered and whined more.  
  
"Let me go!" his loud screaming mixed with the small choke of crys tore inside his throat. The boy violently dug his sharp nails deeper into the other boy's flesh, trying for the attempt to get away. Ignoring the horrible pain Bakura only held him more closely against his body, flinching occasionally, but never letting him go.  
  
Finally giving up on himself, Ryou stopped struggling against his chest in failure and rested his head against Bakura's. He started crying into his shoulder and allowed all the emotional pain to freely escape inside him. His eyes shut tightly, making the new tears now freely rain down his face while a uncontrollable shaky hand grabbed onto the other boy's shoulder. Ryou's grip that had formed into both clenched fists tightened on the back of Bakura's now wrinkled shirt. He was confessing everything he had hid inside all along, and all his anger was then replaced and actually expressed that he never wanted Bakura to let go of him.  
  
"Please...don't let go...please..." Bakura was even more surprised when Ryou finally returned the embrace by wrapping his arms around Bakura's neck, whimpering, and kissing him once affectionately on the neck sobbing desperately. "J-Just for t-tonight...only..."  
  
Bakura's hand reached the back of his head, slowly pullng his lighter half closely to him. He gently stroked through the boy's soft hair with his fingers, however, Ryou only began crying more violently into him.  
  
"Ryou..."  
  
Bakura gently captured his chin, slowly lifting his face. A pair of innocent chocolate eyes stared back sorrowfully with the look of desperate pleading and nothing else, begging somewhat that he wanted Bakura to say something to him. Anything. Ryou swallowed, but the lump in his throat remained. He just couldn't bring himself to do it. More tears trickled down his face as he slowly closed his eyes, waiting for the Bakura's response to be given to him.  
  
Bakura gently and softly pressed his lips against the boy's. Ryou's eyes widened in shock as he wasn't even expected so soon, but the purpose soon defeated his own frustration mixed with anger, and he felt everything gradually melting away. He closed his eyes again, finally allowing himself to instead give into the comfortable warm feeling he was enjoying at the very moment.  
  
A small desperate whimper was heard; the sound of pleading in which the crying boy wanted more of it. Ryou only wanted to be with him and love him, and thats all it mattered to him right now. The soft caressing hand holding his face gently stroked the tears away that continously slipped down his wet cheek. A couple of muscles in his throat twitched constantly, instantly caused by the struggle fighting against the uncontrollable sobs he tried to keep inside of himself, still, he continued to fail miserably and sorrowfully. As Bakura claimed his lips again, Ryou's tears kept flowing out of his closed eyes. He could not will them to stop no matter what.  
  
Bakura gently kissed all his tears away----his pale and soft lips trailed lower down, following the glistening wet trail from the tear that led down to the youth's bottom jaw. Very tenderly he kissed it away.  
  
"Let's only enjoy this last moment while we can..." Bakura whispered quietly against the other's lips. He lowered his head to start kissing the boy's neck passionately. Ryou tilted his head further back, allowing better access and advantage. He held the darker boy's head in his hands, bringing him closer against his own throat, breathing heavily, moaning softly, and whimpering desperately.  
  
"Bakura.... please....." Ryou pleaded softly, wanting more contact.Bakura granted his request, removing his lips from the boy's throat and replacing them back on the teen's soft lips, kissing him again passionately once more. Bakura wrapped his arm around his shoulders and using the other to gently grasp Ryou's other free hand below, his own hand held and interlocked with the youth's. Fingers caressed each other both tenderly and softly---each gentle and slow stroking ones that expressed strong affection, yet, the touch was so passionate.  
  
The kiss between them was never broken apart, except by the needing of breath they each took between the kisses imperceptibly at occasionally. Ryou moaned, deepening the kiss, sweet temptation growing more rapidly inside him. The white haired ex tomb robber unlocked his hand with the boy's to slowly roam down his slim waist, where he stroked his curves repeatedly with his skilled fingers.  
  
Ryou shivered slightly against the touch momentarily, before finally regaining relaxation completely. Carefully, Bakura gently pressed his tongue against the other's soft lips, licking them softly. Ryou responded by parting his lips apart, allowing entrance into his mouth.  
  
Ryou tilted his head and leaned his back against the wall, bringing the other boy closer against his body along with him. He gently stroked through Bakura's long mane, and Bakura caressed and rubbed the back of his neck firmly. Realizing for himself that the teen was growing more comfortable now, Bakura allowed himself to freely use his other free hand to slowly and carefully slide up the boy's stripped shirt, giving out and letting him know any signs of contact he was committing. Immediately, Ryou gasped in sudden alert and began whimpering insecurely in himself, at the fact that he had never experienced the feeling before.  
  
"Bakura....please......" Ryou whined quietly, suddenly growing more uncomfortable at the situation, but Bakura instantly cut him off.  
  
"Shh... it's okay. Just trust me and relax..." Bakura comforted gently, informing the teen he wasn't planning something odd or unusual so suddenly without any warnings. Truthfully freely admitting to his own self, Ryou was still very young and innocent, and he never experienced through such a great emotion before with someone. It felt nice, but he also had his own limits at other certain times, but although he did trust Bakura with all his heart.  
  
Ryou finally nodded gently, allowing the other boy to continue his procedure. Bakura, satisfied, slowly ran his hand along the soft smooth skin beneath his shirt. Ryou shivered and trembled, feeling his other half's cold hand against his own warm bare chest. Bakura massaged and caressed his chest firmly. Literally, Ryou purred assidiously, enjoying the touch. He immediately arched his body into it, desiring more better access.  
  
"Bakura...." Ryou moaned quietly, seemingly wanting more.  
  
Bakura couldn't help himself but to only smirk slightly, knowing well that the boy was enjoying it after all. When he finally removed his hand from inside the teen's shirt, he wasn't expected to get a small, soft whine back. It soon revealed to him that Ryou wanted more, to be touched----to be comforted----to be loved...  
  
Bakura noticed the desperate expression placed upon Ryou's face, and he frowned immediately. Bakura slowly reached out for his pale neck with both hands, and placed them around his throat as if he was going to suffocate the boy, however, he only wanted to touch the young teen. Slowly Ryou closed his eyes, enjoying that his yami was literally rubbing his fingers firmly against his relaxed muscles, and his head bent back almost instinctively.  
  
"Bakura... I....."  
  
"What is it...?" Bakura asked, continuing to caress him.  
  
"I... want to touch you.... like the way you did for me...." he pleaded softly, bending towards to kiss him again. Never breaking the kiss, Bakura allowed him to take control, changing his position as he sat beneath the other. Ryou wrapped his arm around his slim waist, his lips pressed against Bakura's collarbone, nipping gently, and kissing softly.  
  
Bakura groaned softly, tilting his head back as Ryou slowly trailed his tongue up his long throat until the boy finally reached and claimed Bakura's lips once more with his own. Ryou closed his eyes, licking them slowly and lustfully. Bakura groaned once more, arching beneath the teen's body, hands fisting into the carpet floor.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Ryou sighed softly, bringing his legs closer to his chest for better warmth. He was staring up at the big and dark falling sky with fascination. He smiled momentairly. Bakura was sitting closely right beside him , also looking up into the sky. The bright shining moon was soon revealed behind the dark cloudy skies, casting different dark shadows beside the two boy's sitting forms. Him and Bakura had walked a long distance to get away from the house to where the two of them finally reached and sat silently on top of the small cliff; the same exact place where both of them came across a couple of days ago when Ryou wanted to show and surprise Bakura what snow looked like for the first time.  
  
"Hey... it even looks more pretty in the night." Bakura allowed a small smile.  
  
Ryou nodded gently in agreement. "Yeah...pretty." He sighed softly.

It wasn't too long until Bakura then suddenly felt Ryou's hand gently grasp his own. He stared down at his hand before glancing back up at the boy again.  
  
"...Stay with me till the end. Please." Ryou spoke softly and gently, not taking his eyes off in front of him.  
  
"...Not just till the end.... Always." Bakura closed his eyes.  
  
Ryou slightly turned his head to look back at him, and smiled softly.  
  
"Always then..." he agreed softly.  
  
Bakura stared at him for a moment, before gently capturing his face. The darker boy kissed him tenderly on the lips once more while a small tear soon slowly cascaded down the Ryou's face, however, the small smile on Ryou's lips still remained.Bakura slowly pulled away, finally breaking the kiss. Ryou opened his eyes and stared back at him lovingly.  
  
"Did I ever tell you that....your beautiful?"  
  
"...No. You never told me." Ryou smiled, closing his chocolate eyes once more. He then slowly returned back the kiss by pressing his lips gently against the boy's own.  
  
"But... I always thought you were." Ryou whispered softly against his lips. The hands still remained interlocked with each other, and none of them ever broke the kiss. Ryou wasn't really sure what to think. For Bakura to kiss him like this, with such an honest feeling of care behind his lips, it still even surprised Ryou greatly. Yet the more he thought about it, the more he realized that this was what he wanted. To be closer to Bakura and change him was his only goal, and now that Ryou had finally found and made that light to grow inside of him once again, he couldn't remember when he had ever felt so happy. They sat there on the edge of the cliff, surrounded by the falling snow intertwined in their sweet bliss. Bakura ruined the moment by breaking and kiss, and suddenly stood back up on his feet.  
  
"Don't you think we should be heading back now? It's getting late." Bakura stretched his arms out tiredly.  
  
"Good idea." Ryou agreed.

_He gently grabbed and took my hand tightly in his as he first led the way by turning his back. We both held each other's hand while we continued walking back home, and he never let go... _

_We remained completely silent and none of us spoke a single word. I finally looked up to see the side of his face, for me to realize that his cold expression was still shown like usually. His face looked so gentle before, and now the next mintute it seemed that it had suddenly gotten back to that evil look once again. _

_But whenever he saw me looking at him.... he always smiled. _


	18. Not alone

**Chapter 18 - Not alone**

Ryou sighed softly as he couldn't make himself fall asleep no matter what. He had so much things floating around in his mind at the moment that he wanted to share with someone, but the only person that Ryou knew well enough who wouldn't mind would be Bakura, however, at the same situation he found that it was also difficult that he couldn't allow himself to explain Bakura everything, instead, he was actually hesitant in thinking how he would react. He wanted to have a better converse with Bakura about his own life for once, and also hear Bakura's own in return for that matter. Although he had gotten closer with him, there were so much other things as well that Ryou wanted to know more about him.  
  
Ryou finally found himself standing silently outside Bakura's room, debating whether or not if he should get the chance, but he relunctantly backed away from the door, lowering his fist, but Ryou wasn't expected that Bakura had already caught and sensed his presence standing outside by hearing soft noises that came from Ryou's own soft and shaky breathing.  
  
Bakura wore a lose hooded shirt with jeans, laying silently on top of the bed with his legs strangled out and arms crossed and resting under his head as he stared at the ceiling above him. Ryou wasn't the only one who had been in his own room thinking about thoughts, however, Bakura also had random things on his mind as well ever since his last conversation with the pharaoh on that one day. He had some secrets of his own, which he hadn't told Ryou about it yet. Of course he also had times when he did wanted to confess to Ryou everything about himself, for example, that one night when he was in Ryou's room while he was writing his essay after they both returned back after the meeting with Yami and Yuugi at the ice cream shop. Bakura was more confident in himself to tell him everything on that day, but he now remembered that he lost that one chance while he was talking with Ryou. Bakura wanted to tell him, confess to him, and share with what he wished to tell him.  
  
Now, he worried what would possibly happen if he never told him consequently, which now he realized the fact that he won't probably ever get the last chance to explain himself. Bakura sighed somewhat sadly, finally closing his brown eyes.  
  
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&  
  
Ryou lingered quietly at Bakura's door, resting his head gently against it. He waited patiently as if he was expecting Bakura to feel his own presence sooner or later and call out to him. Suddenly, several memories came across his mind at the moment as well. Ryou smiled softly at remembering the moments when he had taken Bakura out for him to enjoy having fun with himself. How Bakura experienced with snow for the first time ever, how Bakura enjoyed almost all the things that he also liked. Ryou realized then that Bakura and him both had some things in common after all, even if they were completely different from one another, both in personality and attitude. Ryou thought of him like his own other twin brother at times, although he never had one. He always wanted a sibling, of course he did have a younger sister named Amane long ago when he was much younger, but Ryou knew she was gone now...  
  
"...You can come in you know."  
  
Ryou snapped from his thoughts and suddenly heard a slight muffled voice behind the door he was sitting against. Getting back onto his feet again, he slowly entered the room, to immediately find that Bakura was resting himself on the bed. Bakura allowed himself to give him back a small glance before staring back up at the ceiling like previously. Ryou walked slowly over and sat himself down next to Bakura on the bed, hands resting on top of his own lap. He slightly turned his head to the side and slowly fixed his eyes upon Bakura, who only didn't bother glancing back at him and instead continued to stare above him.  
  
Ryou turned his attention back to the floor, staring quietly.  
  
"...What's on your mind?" Bakura finally asked calmly, breaking the silence that had taken between them.  
  
"...H-How did you know?" Ryou was stunned and surprised. "I know you too well...." Bakura replied simply. "...I guess so." Ryou agreed softly, eyes still glued to the ground. "I'm so obvious, aren't I?" Ryou tore a small pathetic laugh from his throat.  
  
"...About my past." Bakura easily answered his own question, flopping and rolling over to lay on his side. "...Am I right....Ryou?" he stated softly.  
  
Ryou was literally amazed by the way Bakura asked him perfectly on what was exactly on his mind. "...Yes." Ryou admitted quietly. "I'm sorry Bakura... it's really none of my business to be concerned about it so much, but I just can't help it sometimes... it's just that....I really...do care for you...alot...."  
  
"...Ryou....there's nothing wrong with that...." Bakura told him doubtfully, playing with the white sheets with his fingers. "I don't want to cause any more trouble Bakura.... I don't want to be a burden to anyone anymore. I'm so sorry..." Ryou whispered apologetically. "You're not a burden Ryou... trust me on that." Bakura frowned.  
  
"....I just wish....that I could tell you so much more what's really in my heart right now, but I'm only afraid that it would effect you as well." Ryou sighed.  
  
"...About your own past." Bakura answered simply.  
  
"I'm sorry Bakura.... since you've told me once before about your's, I'v wanted to share some with you of mine in return so we would come to understand each other more better. I didn't want you to think you were the only one and be sad..." Bakura then released the blanket from his hand, and sat himself up from the bed. He now faced the boy, looking at him in the eyes.  
  
"I'm not sad...." Bakura denied. "I don't care about the past anymore Ryou...I'v put everything back behind me now. It's not important to me..."  
  
"That's not true Bakura. I know you still think about the conflict from time to time, even now. I know you do, and I can see that your suffering from it..." Ryou frowned sadly.  
  
"I'm not suffering from anything. I'v lost something before in my life that I valued so much, but I don't have the right time to worry about it now as a big problem of my own, because it's the past. I have other important motivations that I must focus on. You know that right...?"  
  
"Bakura...your not the only one who lost something valuable in life, I'v lost something that I kept and treasured in my past before. I know exactly how it feels..." Ryou smiled sadly. "And what would that be Ryou...." Bakura demanded, slight anger rising inside him at the thought.  
  
"....My family." He whispered softly, keeping his head low as his bangs covered and formed odd and dark shadows underneath his eyes. "I'v already known that..." Bakura told him.  
  
"....H-How did you know--" Ryou looked surprised again. "I told you Ryou... I can read your thoughts and dreams you know. I'v seen it once before. Your mother and sister....I know what happened to them." Bakura spoke softly.  
  
"....Yes. Ever since I lost them.... I felt really lonesome living in this house by myself, although my father was always distant from me. I wanted them back again, especially my sister since I was so close with her in the family. My life was never fully complete without them ever since they left me here... I just feel so lonely..." Ryou closed his eyes. "I was there when Amane died...you know what she told me before she left? She told me.... to never change the kind of person who I was."  
  
"...She's right you know." Bakura agreed. "....You are a really good person, Ryou." he admitted softly. "Really?" Ryou asked quietly, finally looking back at Bakura in the eyes.  
  
"....That's why you always cared about me, giving me so many chances even after what I'v done to you and caused you all the suffering and pain in the past. You always thought positively even in the worse situations that would occur, trying your best to overcome it no matter what, even though you were always scarred. I realized....that your not so weak like how I used to call you so much back then, but instead, your a really strong person.... no one is like that Ryou, and having to go through all the horrible pain and pressure.... you were always patient with it, even now. No one has ever done that for me before...and....that's something what I admired about you...." He confessed.  
  
The look of amazement and shock was written across Ryou's face and wide eyes as he only stood silent. He never knew Bakura would ever tell him something flattering like this about himself. "Bakura....." he whispered shakily. "...I never knew you thought of me like that...."  
  
Bakura sighed softly, closing his eyes. "...Isn't it interesting Ryou?"  
  
"What is?" Ryou asked curiously. "Not only one, but instead, how both of us have lost something in the past that we loved so much. It's really interesting how it would all come down to finally realizing that I'v found and stayed with someone who has been through alot as much as I have all this whole entire time...I guess....we really do have things in common with each other....even though... we're completely different...."  
  
Ryou only smiled happily, glad to find that all he ever wanted was Bakura to tell him something like this which he never done before. It was very meaningful for him and Bakura to have a nice conversation for once over a good topic, which both of them can share with one another.  
  
"What did you lose that you loved?" Ryou asked. "....My family. Like yours." Bakura responded quietly. "Your family also? I... I never knew you had one back then...." Ryou's eyes slightly widened in shock.  
  
"They....were murdered...."  
  
"Oh my god...by who?" Ryou's eyes widened more. "Ryou....I can't tell you...it's... something that is forbidden to let anyone know the secrets of the Kura Eruna Village." Bakura kept his head low.  
  
"Kura Eruna Village....was that the name of your hometown?" Ryou asked. "Yes, it was.... the place where they were murdered....the place where the thieves lived....the place where I grew up...." Bakura whispered softly.  
  
"Bakura....I want to know what happened....it's alright..." Ryou comforted softly, wanting him to tell him everything he knew. He gently took Bakura's hand into his, and Bakura looked at him in the eyes with a frown. "....I lied to you Ryou....telling you that I didn't remember much, but you don't even know how much I remembered everything what happened...." Bakura's voice dripped with mild hate and anger. "...I think you deserve to know exactly what happened to me than any one else. I'm sure your ready by now to hear the whole real truth about myself..."  
  
Ryou nodded slowly, gesturing him to ahead.  
  
"...Ever since the day I was a small child back in my past life, I was forced to watch the many people of the Kura Eruna Village get slaughtered and detroyed unmercifully , including the murder of my whole family. They were all killed by the Pharaoh's army on a mission to make 99 human sacrifices in order for creating all the seven millennium items with their own flesh and blood....like the millennium ring right there...." Bakura pointed towards the golden ring hanging from Ryou's neck. "I was there when it all happened....hiding myself behind the wall that I found for myself to be not seen in sight, watching helplessly at the whole gruesome scene in front of me with my own wide eyes as I only couldn't help but instead only watch every single person die and suffer after one another...  
  
The pharaoh was responsible for this? You mean Yami?" Ryou's eyes widened in shock.  
  
"Not necessarily... it was actually the previous pharaoh before Yami became one after following his own father's foot steps, including one of his loyal priests who had ordered the men about the mission to be completed and carried out immediately on the next day... however... I was the only survivor remaining left after everyone died in my village that same exact day, and I realized that I was all alone in the middle of my own destroyed home place....with no one beside me anymore. Do you know how long and how much I experienced with loneliness? Know how much pain I suffered from all the years then?  
  
Finally leaving the painful memories behind me permanently, I soon turned and grew more corrupted with darkness; my own heart filled with both hatred and anger, wanting full revenge on the Pharaoh without giving him any mercy what so ever until I saw the day he suffered and died. But...Ryou....I was a lot like you once before....more innocent.... but that obviously didn't last long enough as I couldn't control my own sanity any longer afterwards...  
  
I immediately decided on planning my new goal to collect all the millennium items for myself and kill the pharaoh for my revenge...which I have been plotting to think of a good plan for a while all this entire time even after my defeat in Duelist Kingdom and Battle City... until I fought with him in the Memory World at the same time when I finally got my true identity back again in that place. I used Diabound against him with our duel. I lost at the end...but...I'm still alive right now. But now....I'm not sure for myself what I'm supposed to accomplish any further... and the memories from the past are still with me as I'm here without my true purpose. But yes, I wasn't evil back then like how I am now...  
  
So yeah....Ryou....I'v finally told you everything there is to know all about me. Are you surprised now by the whole truth?" Bakura finished simply. Ryou was speechless through the whole time Bakura was speaking to him. Ryou finally tilted his head up and looked at him with sorrowful eyes, expressing sadness. "Bakura....I..I..."  
  
"You never knew?" Bakura scoffed softly. "Of course you didn't....because I never told you about it ever before. And one last thing I haven't told you is that.... I also had a younger sister like you did. She was killed along with all of them, and I saw her face in my head on that same exact day when you showed me what snow looked like for the first time at the cliff. I remembered the same moment when I had also made that promise with her.... to someday show her what snow looked like. Ryou... do you know what she said before she died?"  
  
Ryou shook his head slowly.  
  
"....She told me to never change the kind of person who I was... exactly how your own sister told you before she left for her death. She loved me as a good brother to her, and she wanted me to make that promise with her. I did make that promise with her... but I broke it." Bakura spoke softly, looking down. "I didn't. I didn't remain the same person she wanted me to always be....instead.... I changed. But you Ryou.... you never changed, however, you were the one to always keep that same promise with your own sister..."  
  
Ryou finally had tears welling in his eyes after hearing from Bakura's whole story. "Bakura....that's so horrible...why....why did...." he sniffled, wiping his tears away with his hand quickly. "I'm so sorry...." he apologized softly. "You don't have to apologize Ryou... it's not your fault you know." Bakura told him.  
  
"I know.... but Bakura....just all the things you've told me....were the facts I never about this whole entire time. If only... I'v known this earlier...I would come to understand you more better and help out....but I didn't... instead....I always thought negative thoughts about you ever since..." Ryou closed his eyes. "Why didn't you tell me in the beginning....." he whispered softly and shakily at the end.  
  
"....Ryou... come here..." Bakura gestured softly, bringing and reaching his hand foward. Ryou looked down at his hand before glancing back up at Bakura's face. He smiled softly and finally took the response. Bakura gently pulled his body towards him closer, bringing him into an tight embrace. Ryou soon found himself resting his head against Bakura's chest, feeling his heart beat. Bakura moved his hand over to place it on Ryou's back, gently and lightly stroking it with his fingertips. Ryou didn't know why, but it somewhat felt very comforting to him.  
  
"...Bakura....your not alone....you have to know that. I...I know I'v told you once that I wished that you would die so you wouldn't have to cause me pain and suffering....but...now....I don't want you to ever leave....I want you to stay with me...." Ryou stared down below him from the other's chest with half closed eyes.  
  
"Ryou....I....I know that.... but.... I can't....I can't stay here forever. Even though the past is the past, I still haven't found out what my real and true motives are for the future, and I have to find it.... but I promise.... I'll... I'll stay with you as long as I possibly can...." he placed a pale hand on top of Ryou's head, gently rubbing the back of his silky hair.  
  
"I understand......Bakura.....maybe it isn't too late to that make that promise with your own sister....it's never too late....maybe you can start everything new now...." Ryou buried and nuzzled his face into the man's chest. He grabbed onto Bakura's shirt firmly as if he was desperately wanting him to never leave him by his side. Bakura allowed one of his hand to drop to Ryou's back, gently rocking the young teenager. Ryou then suddenly felt the tiredness catching up to him after a while. He sighed softly before finally and slowly closing his eyes, allowing himself to fall asleep on Bakura's chest peacefully and silently. He then fell fast into the slumber awaiting him...  
  
Bakura rested his chin on top of Ryou's head. He softly brushed his long fingers tenderly over the boy's soft face. "...Ryou.....I really do like you......alot....." he whispered softly, burying his face into the teen's white hair. "...You're right... maybe I really can start over and make a difference....but this time with you by my side. You had always needed me back then even at the time when everything was different between you and me....but now.... it's my turn by needing you....  
  
Bakura shut his eyes tightly. After a while of trembling lightly with Ryou sleeping silently in his arms, he finally took a long deep breath from his soft hair. "....I can't lose you too....I just can't....." Bakura eye's slowly closed, also feeling the tiredness getting to him after a while holding Ryou in his arms. "Do you understand....." he whispered softly before allowing himself into a deep sleep.


	19. My Promise

**Chapter 19: My Promise**  
  
...I'm finally about to come to the end of this very long journal I'v been always wanting to write ever since, allowing myself to reflect back at the past again for one last time, remembering all the good and bad memorys. As I'm writing and finishing my little story your reading at the very moment, my life is also slowly fading away more gradually as I sit alone at "our" own very spot. Bakura and mine, the love of my life. The small hill. I just.... need a little bit more further to go.... until I finally finish. I can't stop here...no. No. I'm growing more weaker every minute, but I'm continuing to fight against it with all of my remaining strength left inside me. Maybe...somebody lucky enough will somehow find my journal and read this story when I leave; which I'm hoping it would somday be Bakura. Now, I'v told you everything how it all started in the way beginning; and how it all finally came to an end. I'm glad that I got the chance to enjoy writing this story of mine before it's too late. I hope all this explanation made sense.  
  
I realized... that my love for Bakura had always been existing inside me somewhere even at the time when I couldn't clearly identify the new feelings I was experimenting for him back in the past. It took me awhile to realize that I did truely love him ever since then, but it was always obvious that none of us were able to express it to one another back then when things were so different between us. Then...he finally opened up to me when the time finally came, and I did the same way for him.  
  
So, thats it? Does that mean this is the end? Will he ever come back looking for me? It was very difficult for me to accept that day when I left him without giving any notice, except the small note I wrote him before I left him. I had to go back to the hospital when my illness was growing much worse to the point where I needed special care and I couldn't do things on my own more stably. When no one was looking after me in the room I was resting in, I took the chance to escape sneakily from staying there any longer. I didn't want to deal with the horrible pain awaiting soon for both Bakura and me since I knew I had no hope left inside me. I knew I was going to die sooner or later, so I couldn't allow him to watch me while I did. Maybe...he's searching for me now as I even speak. I feel guilty now for ever taking that risk to leave him, however, my love for Bakura will always remain inside me forever even if I'm forced to die with the pain and sorrow. Nothing could ever change that. Nothing. I know he cares about me; that is why I'm waiting for him to finally show up here. Bakura... I want him to know that he's very special to me in every possible way no matter what happens, and even if I was forced to leave him for eternally, I wouldn't want him to be alone again. Ever.  
  
I....just would like to hear him tell me that he loves me for the last time before it's all too late...that's all I want from him as a one last gift...  
  
I guess...I'll just wait a little more longer for him if he'll ever show up...  
  
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&  
  
Bakura panted and breathed frantically and exhaustedly, continuing to sprint possibly everywhere and anyplace where his already sore legs could take him. Nothing could ever stop him no matter what happened until he would finally find Ryou again, and only have him back into his protected arms again like once before. It wasn't long enough when Bakura found that Ryou was to be nowhere in the hospital, so he had immediately ran off searching for him outside. It was the exact time when he suddenly became frantic as soon as he found the small note sitting beside the desk in the room when he found that Ryou was missing. His eyes grew more wider and wider while reading each every other word on the small letter that Ryou left him before he left, and his hands had trembled uncontrollably with the paper still held in both of his hands. He had immediately dropped the paper carelessly to ground, and instantly dashed out the building...  
  
_Dear Bakura,  
  
...You're probably wondering where I went off to at this very moment while your reading this note I wrote to you, and your probably very worried about me. I'm sorry that I had to cause all this trouble for you to think where I ran off to, but I just had to make this last decision to leave without seeing you for the last time. I didn't want to cause pain for both you nor me when I know there would be no any hope left inside me any longer. I'v been very patient, and I'v waited too long to live with this terrible curse still inside me all these years, and it has been very painful; not only physically, but also emotionally as well. I think... it's really the right time for me now to finally be free from everything. I don't want to go, but it looks like I have no other choice to make...  
  
I remembered when you made that one promise with me back then; when you had promised to always stay by my side until the end, and you did. I thank you so much for everything what you did for me until then. You really did care about me after all these years of both suffering and good moments between you and me. Believe it or not... I had always loved you even at the very beginning. It was difficult for me to figure it out for myself after a while, but I really did, however, my love for you grew more stronger each and every day until I was finally ready to confess to you on that day when I told you that I really did love you. Maybe...you will find my journal that I always keep with me later, and I'm sure that you'll come to understand it more clearly someday afterwards. It's where I usually write all my own true thoughts and sayings, mostly only about you...  
  
Please try to understand what I'm trying to tell you Bakura... I just wished I wasn't forced to take this action, but if you really do come looking for me after you finish reading this note, I'll be waiting for you somewhere. I love you so much Bakura... and my love for you won't ever change no matter what. You're too special to me, and thats what hurts me more inside. I know I can't stay with you any longer for me to experience all the things in life with you anymore, but I'm really glad I got the chance to spend time with you as much as possible. I'm running out of time Bakura.... I'm so sorry. I hope you'll forgive my foolishness. I'll just pray at the place where I'm staying at that you'll really forgive me as you read this, and ll also pray that God will spare me some little time left so that I could see you again for the last time. Can you guess where you'll find me? I think...it would be easy for you to figure it out soon...  
  
Love,  
Ryou_  
  
"Ryou! Where are you?!" Bakura screamed as loudly as he can. His throat grew more sore after a long time of calling out the teen's name. He finally gave up miserably, finally falling to the ground on his knees exhaustedly. He shut his eyes tightly, breathing heavily and rapidly with strong gasps. "No..."  
  
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&  
  
....Finished. I whispered softly as I finally dropped the pencil from my fingers that I was writing with, allowing it to roll down onto the ground beneath me. I was really weak now; weaker than ever before. I don't think I could hold on any much longer, but I was desperately wishing that I had more strength to control it. I wish I was stronger, but I was too weak. My breathing grew slightly heavier with rapid, quick, and sharp, small gasps. I'm not ready to die....I didn't want to leave now, yet, I didn't want to leave Bakura without saying goodbye. There was a sudden sharp pain that stung through my heart, but I didn't care. I guess....Bakura really isn't coming after all.  
  
I took a final glance at my own reflection below me. I looked pathetic, but a small, sad smile was also shown upon my pale lips in return. I noticed how much I resembled much alike to Bakura in many similar ways from my appearance, however, we both were always so different from each other at the same time as well. People would always consider us twins when they saw us, and Bakura would fool them around that we're related. I laughed at the thought even if it wasn't the truth.  
  
I took the golden sennen ring out from the bag sitting right beside me. I took one last stare at it before placing it slowly around my thin neck. At least I could wear a symbol that represented and belonged to both Bakura and me while I die. Bakura had always kept his promise to stay by my side until the end, and that's all I ever wanted from him; to stay with me. I gently wrapped my arms tightly around the big rock beside my body; as if I was pretending and wishing it was really Bakura who I was holding and hugging at the very moment. I softly and quietly whispered his name to myself repeatedly over and over again. I gently rested my head against it, slowly closing my eyes for a while.  
  
I suddenly heard a faint familiar voice calling out to me not too long from a distance. The voice grew more clear as it approached me closer and closer; the voice I knew well that belonged to Bakura's. Did he finally find me? I smiled happily to myself, glad that I could really have the last chance of seeing him before I go. He really did remember the same place where we both used to come during last winter just to see the snowflakes fall. It was getting pretty late, and I could see the red sunset casting over the clear lake; it looked so beautiful. It was the perfect timing and scenery before my leave.  
  
When I opened my eyes again, I saw Bakura standing far away from me. His calling had stopped, and I couldn't hear his voice anymore. His eyes widened in somewhat both fear and unexpected surprise; still, he only stood motionless and silently as he stared at me for quite a while. I immediately saw all the hurt and pain through his eyes that he could give to me, and it wasn't long when I realized he was trembling. I returned the stare back at him and only smiled softly, just glad by knowing he was in my presence again.  
  
"Bakura...." I whispered softly, closing my eyelids halfway.  
  
"Ryou...." he whimpered softly, slowly approaching me carefully.  
  
"Y-You...finally came...I'm so happy..." I smiled again. There was a sudden great pause as I couldn't finish my sentence, and my voice grew heavier to even speak anymore. Another pain shot through me again, and I almost fell to the ground. Without a second thought, Bakura quickly ran over to me, catching and holding me in his wrapped arms. I stared up at his face weakly but lovingly. He held me closely against his body tightly, begging somewhat.  
  
"Ryou....I'm so sorry I wasn't here sooner. It's all my fault, but I'm here now..." Bakura whispered shakily, burying his face deeply into the crook of my neck. He sobbed quietly and began gently kissing my neck. "I'm sorry..."  
  
"Bakura...." I gently caressed Bakura's cheek, slowly lifting his face to meet his eyes again. I noticed all the emotional pain and sorrow afflicted upon his eyes. My frown deepened. All of my energy seemed to have been drained as I forced myself to open my eyes. My face felt wet but it wasn't from my tears and it wasn't raining either. My vision was slightly blurred and I couldn't see Bakura too well. I reached up to touch his face. It was wet.  
  
"Bakura...why are you crying? You're scaring me..." I spoke softly, gently and tenderly brushing the tears away from Bakura's wet cheek and face. "Please don't cry... I'v never seen you cry so much before..."  
  
"I read your note and I read every single word from your own mouth. Please... don't go Ryou. Don't leave me... I can't lose you...." Bakura sobbed more loudly and continued planting small, quick kisses from my face down to my neck constantly. I felt Bakura's hot tears tingling against my pale skin.  
  
"Bakura....I...." I whimpered, tilting my head back.  
  
"I love you Ryou....believe it or not....I really do love you with all my heart. I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier in the beginning..." Bakura ran his long fingers through my hair affectionately. I only smiled sweetly. "Bakura...thank you so much for telling me that. That's...all I'v ever wanted....from you....to tell me that you love me...." Bakura hugged me, pulling me tightly against his own body; and cried more violently into the my shoulder, finally allowing everything to escape from him inside.  
  
"I'm so sorry Bakura.... I don't want to leave you either. I want to stay with you forever, but it's obvious that its impossible and it can't be done. Bakura....I enjoyed being with you at the remaining time. We...really did go through alot, haven't we? Just remember....you're never alone. I'll always be with you no matter what, and my love for you won't ever change. I know it's difficult to accept things in life, but you can't really help it since life just goes on...it's cruel, but you can't really do anything about it. Please...try to understand...." I also had tears in his eyes.  
  
"I know Ryou, but....there might still be hope..." Bakura kept his face buried into my shoulder.  
  
"There isn't. It's already too late...I'm dying Bakura..." I sobbed.  
  
"NO!" Bakura screamed. "You're not going to die, trust me." Bakura took my hand tightly in his.  
  
"I'v trusted you with everything else when you told me to, but now I can't trust this one on you Bakura...I'm sorry...." I closed my eyes, placing his hand on my cheek. I gently nuzzled him.  
  
Bakura finally lifted hid face from my shoulder; and he stared at my miserable face. I slowly caressed his face gently, and his eyes softened more dramatically. "Ryou....your such a good person....my hikari......my love....." Bakura slowly bent his head lower down to the my face closely; he stopped until he was an inch away from my face, causing his white bangs to fall over and cover his eyes, forming dark shadows underneath his eye sockets.  
  
"Please....allow me to touch you for one last time Ryou...." He pleaded softly. Bakura then pressed his lips harshly against my soft lips, kissing me passionately than ever before. I gladly accepted it and returned the passionate kiss, moaning weakly. The kiss had lasted for quite a while, until Bakura finally pulled away, breathing breathlessly. I now had warm tears falling freely from my cheeks, and it grew more difficult for me to breathe; this made Bakura more concerned.  
  
"Bakura....I....have something....to give you...." I slowly reached a hand into one of my pockets, and revealed a small duel monsters card. "Please....keep this for me...." I smiled weakly at him.  
  
"W-What is this...?" Bakura lowered his eyes down to my hand.  
  
"Change of heart; my favorite card." I opened one of Bakura's fist and placed the card into his hand. "T-This is mine...but I'm giving it to you for you to keep with you always. It resembles both of us; that is why I kept it all along with me....but it's your's now..."  
  
"Ryou...I...." Bakura had more tears falling constantly from his eyes.  
  
"I-Is it okay if I keep this millennium ring with me? I....want to have something that resembles...both of us too, so that both of us would have something...from each other no matter what happens...."  
  
"S-Sure." Bakura forced a small smile.  
  
"Thank you Bakura..." I whispered softly. I was losing my voice. Not now, please, I prayed as tears fell down my face. I need to tell him before I go. I haven't told him yet that I loved him. "I....just....have one more....thing....to do for the last... time...." I picked a small piece of rock off from the dirty ground; I slowly brought it up to my eyes and stared at it for a while more weakly.  
  
I pointed a finger towards the lake in front of us. "Bakura.....there is this saying....where if you throw a rock in a c-chaped position across the water or the lake and if it bounces or skips three times, it means 'I love you'. My parents once told me about it long ago when I was younger. My mother told me that if I ever find the person who I truely love with all of my heart, I could be lucky enough if it'll really work...." I looked back at Bakura, and smiled. "Ready...?"  
  
With the last remaining strength left inside me, I quickly threw it across the lake, and it skipped three times. I love you. "P-Perfect...." I breathed softly. I then looked back at Bakura in the eyes, and I smiled happily once more back at him. "...I...I...really did it....."  
  
With that, I slowly closed his eyes for the last time and my muscles loosened; still held in Bakura's arms.  
  
"Ryou...." Bakura whispered quietly, bringing him closer. "Ryou...?"  
  
Silence.  
  
"Ryou??" Bakura gently shook the boy in his arms; still, nothing. "Ryou, answer me..." Bakura continued shaking him lightly, brushing the boy's bangs from his face. "Answer me!" He repeated more firmly. Ryou only laid silently in his arms. Bakura then grew frantic, shaking the boy more violently. "RYOU!"  
  
Nothing.  
  
"RYOU!!!" Bakura screamed loudly. He whimpered more desperately and shook Ryou again in his arms. "Ryou........" Bakura finally stopped, and stared down at the other's pale face with the disbelief and silence. He shook his head slowly. "You can't go...." but it was already too late. Ryou had already passed on minutes ago. Bakura screamed his name out loudly than ever once more before finally burying his face into the boy's chest and neck, bawling violently into him. He cried so painfully that his whole body shook with Ryou's own lifeless one; the worse pain which he had never felt in his whole entire life before.  
  
Bakura's hot tears ran persistantly down his face, landing down on Ryou's bare skin. He continued to suffer through all the emotional pain for a long massive amount of time, holding Ryou in his arms.

&&&&&&&&&

Bakura sat on top of the big rock, with Ryou sitting on top of his lap. The teen's head rested against Bakura's shoulder and his face buried into the darker boy's neck with his eyes still closed. Bakura only held him closely against his body, and silently watched the red sunset set over the clear lake in front of both of them.

"It's beautiful... don't you think?" Bakura whispered to the dead boy laying against him. "If...only you could watch it with me...if only you could open your eyes again....once more....it would be alot more beautiful..." Bakura stared down at Ryou's pale face, and watched him silently. He carefully captured Ryou's chin in his fingers, slowly lifting his face. "If only....you could open your eyes again just once more for me to tell you... how much I still love you..." Bakura slowly closed his eyes and pressed his lips against Ryou's cold ones, kissing him softly.

Bakura pulled away from him and released Ryou's chin, allowing the teen's head to fall back down to his shoulders. Bakura reached into his pocket, revealing the change of heart card in appearance that Ryou gave him. He brought it towards his face, staring at the half demon and half angel in the picture.

"I....haven't seen this card for a while..." With his other hand, Bakura picked the journal off from the ground sitting beneath him. He opened it slowly to the very last page to read Ryou's last paragraph or sentence for the final time.

_This card.... change of heart._

_I picked this card, because it represents both the connected bond and soul of both Bakura and me. He is the darkness; which the dark left side of this card represents him, and I'm the lightness; which the lighter and right side of this card represents the image of myself. It also reveals the heart shown in the middle, held by the hands of the angel in the picture. Its placed in the middle between the both dark and light sides of this card; to show that we share the love, even if both of us are completely different from each other._

_It also shows that any person's own heart and feelings can change unpredictably; whether good or bad, just like how the ability of the card itself works, however, no one can't ever force you to change the kind of person who you truely really are inside. Never..._

Bakura turned to the next page, noticing it was completely blank.

"Ryou....you never finished this....why did you stop here..." Bakura gently laid the book back down on the ground. He then hid and buried his face into the boy's neck, breathing softly. He remained to stay like that for a while, almost falling asleep against Ryou's lifeless body.

"Bakura...." 

It wasn't long when Bakura suddenly felt a warm hand touch his shoulder. The figure couldn't take a good view of Bakura's hidden face, and the unknown person slowly turned the white haired boy's shoulder. Bakura slowly lifted his head from the boy he was holding, and saw the tri colored hair teen; Yuugi.

"...Y-Yuugi."

"Bakura.... what are you doing here..." Yuugi then noticed the boy Bakura was holding as Bakura finally pulled himself away from Ryou, and instantly backed away slowly in half disbelief. His eyes widened.

"Bakura....Ryou....."

"Ryou...What happened...." Joey stuttered.

Yuugi shook his head slowly and quickly ran up to Bakura, pulling on his shirt furiously. "What do you mean too late?!" he demanded. Bakura only kept his head low, bangs covering his brown eyes as Yuugi continued to shake his whole body. Yuugi whimpered softly, eyes staring down at Ryou laying against Bakura.

"We tried...looking everywhere for you two....but now...." Yuugi's eyes welled with tears. He hugged both Bakura and the white haired teen, and cried into Ryou as his tears fell and stained the boy's pale face. Joey gently grabbed the short duelist's shoulders, and slowly pulled him back away from Bakura. Yami only stood completely speechless, fist shaking.

"I can't....let him go...." Yuugi sobbed softly.

"Leave him alone Yuugi..." Joey told him softly, comforting his best friend.

"How...did you find me here?" Bakura spoke softly.

"We read the note back at the hospital that Ryou wrote to you when we found it on the ground, and we...." Joey trailed off, voice dying gradually away. "Why didnt he ever....tell us what was really wrong with him ever before?"

"Joey...it's all my fault. Please....I'm so sorry everyone. I kept it a secret only between Ryou and me from all of you. He didn't want me to tell anyone about it. Yami and me...were the only person that really knew everything what was really going on. Please forgive me that I didn't get the chance to ever tell you guys earlier about it..." Yuugi apologized sadly.

"About what Yuugi?" Joey asked curiously.

"that he had... cancer."

Everyone was completely silent and shocked.

"Ryou..... he never told any of us what was happening..." Anzu slowly brought her trembling hands up to her mouth, and tears immediately fell from her face as she began sobbing quietly. It was too much for her to handle through all the hurting pain.

Bakura looked down at Ryou, brushing his bangs away from his face. "Ryou...I made you that promise of staying with you till the end, but no. It's not the end and it won't ever be. Not yet. Trust me...that promise won't ever be broken. Ever. You never finished the ending of your journal, but now....I can finish that for you..." he whispered softly to the boy. Ignoring the group standing around him, and for one last moment, he pressed his lips against the youth; he grabbed the millennium ring below and placed it into Ryou's hand along with his own, holding it tightly. The others watched him in silence.

Bakura took the book again in his hands for the last time, and with the pencil grasped in his hands, he scribbled a simple sentence on the last big blank page of Ryou's journal before slowly placing it back onto the ground. Carefully, he then reached his arms under Ryou's body and picked him up as he finally stood up. He turned his back from Yuugi and his small gang, slowly starting to walk away.

"Bakura...." Yami stated softly, reaching a hand out towards him. The white haired boy suddenly stopped at his tracks at hearing the voice of the formal pharaoh.

"...I'm sure Ryou was willing to say goodbye to every single one of you one day, but he never got that chance. I'm sorry that he didn't, however, I was the only person who watched him leave in my own arms. Read his journal...and I'm sure all of you will come to understand everything someday more clearly between us..."

"Understand about what?" Yami asked curiously.

"...How he taught me to love." And for the first time ever, Bakura allowed a small smile to appear on his lips towards another different person besides Ryou. Everyone was silent once more.

"Where are you going Bakura?" Yami asked softly.

"...I don't know. I'll be somewhere where I can always be with Ryou and constantly remind him that I love him. I won't ever break the promise I made with him..."

"But...can't you just stay here with us...?" Anzu offered slowly.

"I can't stay here any longer. Maybe...I'll return someday again...when I'm fully ready for the future, but for now... I must focus on what my destiny really is..." Bakura closed his eyes. The boy opened his eyes again and looked at the whole small gang once more for the last time, and continued to slowly walk away wth Ryou carried in his arms. "Goodbye."

"Bakura!" shouted Joey, holding Yuugi in his arms. "Where are you going?"

Bakura continued walking towards the sunset, carrying Ryou in his arms without ever looking back. He didn't answer back, and slowly disappeared off into the distance.

"Hey you guys.... come here." Joey gestured gently towards the small gang. Everyone approached the blonde teen sitting beside the rock. "What is it Joey?" Yami placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Read what he wrote." Joey handed the book to the pharaoh. Yami slowly took it into his hands and looked down at Bakura's writing.

"What does it say?" Anzu asked curiously.

"....True love never has an ending... "

E N D.

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Ah! This is finally the end. It really is. I hope you guys really enjoyed reading this story. It's really one of the best one's I'v written and really put effort to. Thank you so much for all your lovely reviews over the years. I really appreciate all your support and love. I'll be looking foward on writing a new Ryou x Bakura fanfic in the future as well. Till then... Ja ne.

Ryou: You......killed me.....

Bakura: ((chokes the authorness)) I HATE YOU!

Yumi: Xx; ((dying from gaging)) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry! But it was still good, wasn't it? I promise I won't write anymore character deaths in any of my fics anymore. This is my first anyways.

Ryou: I don't believe her...

Bakura: Let's kill her, shall we? ((smirks and pulls out chainsaw))

Yumi : Noooooo xX;

Please you guys... for those of you who were expecting Ryou to survive, please don't get angry or furious that I made Ryou die in this fic. I mean...there's really like a slight or rare chance of a person living from a serious heart desease xX;

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Until then. Ja ne.


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